How do you respond to JW family?

by Laika 22 Replies latest jw friends

  • Laika

    Hi all

    For those who have left and are still in contact with JW family, how do you usually respond when they bring up JW stuff, I.e. Start talking about the nearness of Armageddon or things like that.

    I usually say nothing and just let it pass but I'm considering changing tact to something more confrontational, less because I want to change their mind and more because I find it tiresome. Thoughts?

  • BU2B
    I am still in, but when cultish JW subjects come up, I either try to make a thoughtful TTATT influenced comment, change the subject, or remain silent or say hmmm....
  • DesirousOfChange

    Lately I'm losing my tact. Depending on the individual, as I don't want to have the person "zone out" into Cult Mode immediately, but I find that I more frequently say something like:

    "Oh yes, I remember them stating the very implicitly in a recent article......I think it was the May 22, 1969 Awake! magazine. In fact, that's why I didn't go to college."


  • OneEyedJoe

    Well I'm still in, but I think I'm in somewhat of a similar situation - I can't stand the constant JW talk. Depending on the topic being discussed I'll either ignore it entirely (sometimes I have to excuse myself to keep my sanity) or if I feel like I can say something to shut them down without it blowing back on me too much, I'll do it.

    For example, the other day I was with some family and they were talking about my elderly grandfather and how he'll need to be put in a nursing home soon and someone brought up a recent WT study article (actually I think it was two in a row) about caring for the elderly and one said something like "Wasn't that such a great article!? It was so good because a lot of people just don't want to think about getting older so they don't prepare for it at all." I just said "I don't think it's that they don't want to think about it so much as it is that they've been told their entire lives that they would never get old." You shoulda seen how fast they changed the subject off the cult talk after that.

  • pbrow

    I left about three years... damn.. more like 6 now.. holy cow... I simply refuse to let them shun me. I show up at my mom's, take care of a lot of upkeep on her house as well as mowing and snowblowing.. Just do not allow it. It really is that simple. What are your family members going to do?? Call the police on you? Let them call the police to kick you off of their property and see if that does not make an impression on them.

    When my brother is in town I take the same approach, no one is going to tell me I cannot see my family. (including my family) and no one should tell you that you cannot see your family.

    You can determine what you talk or dont talk about but do not allow them to shun you. They do not realize it but they are counting on YOU to show them what unconditional love is.


  • Oubliette

    "Have you ever noticed, no matter what the Society does, it's good? Even when it's something they previously lambasted. Take for instance televangelism. For decades, the WTBTS publications and GB speakers spoke disparagingly about televangelists. But now they have JW.TV and it's a good thing."

    "If it was bad when Pat Robertson and others did it, then how come it's suddenly good?"

  • freemindfade

    Say nothing! They are preaching to you to bait you into a witch hunt. Trust me. I always kept my mouth shut, when I suggested they not speak so callous and extreme because it would actually not draw people to god but turn them away, I got drawn into a debate, the debate turned into accusations and now no one is speaking to me anymore. Just ignore them. I know its hard. Feel it out carefully at the least, if someone really wants to speak about rationality ok, but generally I would steer clear, they may already suspect and they are waiting to get to the bottom of it so they can get down to the punishment/shunning part to make you come back to god.jw.cult its a trap.

    Just remember this scary fact about the witnesses and other high control religions and governments

    Thinking critically or independently are the MOST offensive and WORST sins you can commit. It's sick but that is the reality.

  • jean-luc picard
    jean-luc picard

    I understand how you feel. I once did that.....and my mother did not speak with me for 5 years..... until she fell gravely ill. So now I say nothing again.

    But it drives me crazy.

  • Phizzy

    I have been out for a good number of years, and my JW family simply do not discuss anything of a religious nature with me, I do believe they are afraid to do so.

    When I on rare occasions meet JW's they have sometimes dropped the odd comment, and in the early days I used to let it slide, or just put in a subtle reply.

    I decided a couple of years ago, that unless it was downright inappropriate, or unkind to do so, such JW's would receive a challenging reply.

    My favourite, which usually ends the conversation is to challenge them to prove to me that they now have the "Truth", as it has all changed since I left.

    I await the call from three or four Elders to do so, strange, it's been many, many months, and they haven't got back to me.

  • freemindfade
    I have sat through so many crazy conversations. Just this weekend I had some Uber dubs staying with me, two are bethelites, they started discussing the lovely rape, dismemberment concubine story. Also god saying yes go and then twice losing. And tens of thousands dying doing what God said to do. I just looked down and kept silent. even at one point with all there justifying the one still said "who can know jehovah" barf. The witness wat of saying god works in mysterious ways ie this makes no sense.

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