HELP - my boyfriend's ex called and wants them to reconcile....what to do? (page 2)

snarf

Juniper,

If he is having that much trouble deciding what to do, then he must have "some" feelings yet for this person. He can have a healthy relationship with his son wether he is involved with the mother or not. You know your value, so please don't wait for this man to decide if he wants you or the ex. Make your intentions known to him, but don't humiliate yourself by giving him reasons why you are better than the ex...it might put him on the defensive towards her. Give yourself a time frame for him to make this decision, when time is up, if he still hasn't made the decision, then time for you to move on. I know the personal heartache this can cause, but better to get it over with now than later. Hope this turns out for the best for you in the long run !! Keep your chin up even if it doesn't go the way you want sweetie.

PoppyR

Stand back, give him space, if he chooses her (this is not about the child, it's a straight decision between you and her, dont confuse things) then you are well rid.

If you convince him to stay, you will be sorry a few months down the line. If he stays, it needs to be completely his choice.

Poppy

nvrgnbk

"Relationship" and relationship are two very different things.
Stay with him.
It's cool that you're willing to share.
Too few girls are like that.

Sorry if my sarcasm was insensitive.

Just wanted to give you some coffee, as in "wake up and smell the coffee".

Uzzah

He will be of more use to his child if he is a good father. You don't have to be living with a child to be a good parent.

When the child sees his father in a happy contented normal relationship, that will be more of an influence than if he watches his two parent's living together in acrimony.

My 2 cents

Smiles_Smiles

OK let me see if I have this right ... HIS ex wants to get back with HIM and YOU are asking what YOU should do.

WHY would YOU need to DO anything?

This is his decision. From what you say he knows that you love him and would like to continue the relationship that yall have. PLEASEEEE do not become one of the women who fight over a man. He has a decision to make ... let him make it.

Love yourself to know your worth and see if he does the same. And if not then move on. No it is not easy to move on when necessary but anything else will chip away at your esteem and your self worth. No one is worth that.

Good Luck ~ Smiles

Quandry

my boyfriend

Well, it doesn't sound to me as if you have exclusive rights. Why has he told you this hurtful information? Is it to start letting you go?

I implore you to hold your head up, and keep your dignity. You will have little of it if you begin begging or trying to "sell yourself" to him.

If you "win" you will always (and maybe he will too) have in the back of your mind "What if they could have gotten back together?"

Maybe if you step back and give this relationship some room, you and he both will be able to think more clearly.

I know this must hurt terribly, but saying or doing anything rash could be even worse down the road.

nvrgnbk

doing anything rash

That's a good point Quandry, he could give her a nasty rash.

lonelysheep

"Relationship" and relationship are two very different things.
Stay with him.
It's cool that you're willing to share.
Too few girls are like that.
Sorry if my sarcasm was insensitive.
Just wanted to give you some coffee, as in "wake up and smell the coffee".

Well, I agree with you.

He's not just with you if he has feelings for her beyond 'my baby's mother'.

bisous

my 2 cents? take a deep breath, pretend you are your BFF, and go back and re-read what you posted as if your BFF sent you this inquiry. I believe a light bulb might go off in your head ... because when you read it back, it sure doesn't seem like this is someone who is committed to a relationship with you. You'll be able to answer your own question easily ...

sparrow

run away...

(if he's considering it at all that is)

HELP - my boyfriend's ex called and wants them to reconcile....what to do?

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