I caught a 'good standing' JW with another woman

jaffacake

Hi old friends,
The reason I joined this group was to stop my lifelong friend getting baptised a JW. Well, I failed when he was baptised 2 years ago.
He never returns my calls and we never see each other unless I call by his house to say an occasional 'hello'.
Anyway I called into a pub on Thursday and there he was having lunch with a woman, not his wife. He promptly left her table and sat with me chatting. He came out with the cliches 'its not how it looks' and 'we're just good friends' and who am I to argue, except for his obvious embarassment. When he didn't go back to her table after 5 minutes she left saying she was going back to work. They are work colleagues.
To me, it looked like he was back to his old ways, as he was never one to miss a chance of a sneaky date before he became a JW in recent years. I actually believe him when he says they're just good friends, in that I don't believe they've had sex, but the friendship did not look platonic to me.
What would his elders make of his behaviour? Any thoughts?
By the way he was on the booze whereas I was on orange juice as it was lunchtime and we were both going back to work.

Dansk

Any thoughts?

Only leave them to it. It's none of your business, they're both adults and everyone here knows hypocrisy is rife in the org.

Sorry he's such an old friend and likely hurt you by ignoring you once he became a JW - but that's the way things are with most JWs.

Ian

jaguarbass

Hello Jeff. So, your not a witless and you joined this group to stop your friend from becoming a witless. I dont know what to think, Jeff. Now your loosing your friend to not only a false religion but another woman, a second woman. Maybe your friend is not a saint. But your a guy and some guys turn a blind eye to what you have observed. Maybe your life long friend doesnt measure up to your standards in more ways than one. I dont have any life long friends, partlly because I moved out of state when I was 28. I cant say how it would have been had I stayed in my home town. Having been a witless for 33 years, I realize I didnt have any friends just a lot of aquaintences. Jeff, maybe its time you start seeing other people.

keyser soze

It may well be that they were only friends or work colleagues. But I know the elders would have something to say about him being in a pub, and with a worldly woman no less. And where was their chaperone?

lisavegas420

I have a comment about this:

By the way he was on the booze whereas I was on orange juice as it was lunchtime and we were both going back to work.

A couple years back my boss was having an affair with one of my co-workers. Both married. I noticed that during this time period, they were both drinking more than they normally did, during lunch, at work, after work...and on weekends. After the affair ended, they both back to hardly ever drinking or maybe only the weekends. When I look back on it now, I'm sure it was a way to ease their conscience.

lisa>----observed from afar and kept my mouth shut.

greendawn

Hi Jaffa we haven't seen you for a long time, how is everything with you?

If the elders knew about his association with this woman they would most probably call him and ask for explanations in case he intends to have a sexual relationship with her. The org must be kept clean they say.

carla

Hello jaffacake,

How are you doing?

Your friend? I would think the elders would believe the baptized jw over you anyway. How is his wife? Does she have any inkling to his ways? Not that you should be the one to fill her in, just wondering.

jaffacake

Many thanks to my old friends (Carla, Greendawn, Dansk) and new ones for offering your thoughts.

Don't get me wrong, if I'm judging him in this matter - he had affairs in the past and although I told him what I thought it never destroyed our friendship. Deep down I suspected his JW lifestyle was largely an act, and this may confirm it. He has had problems with work and financially all his life but the JWs finally gave him something to feel superior about, I think that was the main attraction.

I won't tell my wife because she is (was) very close to his wife and kids and she would be upset for them. I'm glad I ran into these two work colleagues because next time I call by his home to say hello, I think he will find it much harder to talk down to me about how my Christian beliefs are so inferior to the ones he gets from his worldly organisation.

I have missed you all. Its almost a year to the day since I last posted regularly but I intend to pop in from time to time to say hi.

Love from the jaffacake.

barry

Gday jaffacake, Good to hear from you after so long.

jaffacake

Carla

I meant to tell you that several months before his baptism (2 or 3 years ago) he admitted to his wife he wanted to leave her for another woman, someone abroad he had never met, except on the internet. His wife called the elders who read him the riot act. After a row, he did as he was told and allowed his mobile phone and PC to be confiscated, and six months later was baptised a JW.

Hope you and yours are well!

I caught a 'good standing' JW with another woman

Share this