They are stalking me,,

by gabriella 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • Tuesday
    Tuesday
    Just politely say, "excuse me but I have to go to the toilet." Close the door and don't open it again. If they're stupid enough to wait that's their problem.

    I think that would be especially funny if you say "Excuse me but I have to run to the bathroom" shut the door then loudly turn on your TV. Or shut off all the lights in the house, and shut off the front light where they're standing when you close the door.

    In all seriousness if it were me I would just say "I haven't been to meetings for five years, why do you want me to go now?"

  • gymbob
    gymbob

    Most of the time it just comes down to the type of elders you're dealing with...

    I tried to fade and they were not going to let that happen. I tried to not talk about it, change the subject, etc. these guys were real "buckaroos". When they formed a JC, they told me if I don't show up they would DF me. And there you go.

    Sometimes they just don't let you walk away.

    Any witnesses reading this....What does that tell you about your religion?

  • SnakesInTheTower
    SnakesInTheTower

    gabriella...

    From a fellow newbie and so far unsuccessful fader: If one has family in the truth, it makes it hard to avoid being encouraged stalked if you want to maintain contact with family. You are fortunate that you have family that has common sense that has not been Borgified and still talks to you. Good for them!

    I too live in the area where I have been in the "Truth" most of my life...I live in one congos territory, but go to another congo in another circuit about 20-40 min away. Family is not the problem. Many of my friends live near me and are "very very worried." They know that I miss a lot of meetings (I go to Sunday and some TMS/SM, but not tonight ). Word about my not going in formal ministry is not yet seeping into their dub-addled minds yet....when that realization hits fully, then I expect the accelerated "Encouraging" (aka stalking) to start. Since my family is not in this area, I am looking at moving out of state (about 8 hours away) for a possible job promotion, but I am getting flack about that ("you'll get weaker spiritually"....yeah...ok... or "stay and get on your feet spiritually"....isnt that what I am doing by fading...but I digress)

    gabriella... as a former elder, I kinda know how to play this game to keep the locals off my back. (but for how long I dont know) You have 2 choices:

    option 1: The first is not really doable if you want family contact: get in their faces and tell em where to go (and be prepared to be d/f or d/a in absentia..this was becoming common while I was an elder not that long ago)

    choice 2 (and the preferable option):always answer the door and be polite (but dont invite them in unless YOU invited THEM) and be real general about why you arent at the KH....(job, depression, etc as others have said)

    If the BOE gets to asking too many nosy questions, ask them if they know the "411 Scripture"? When they say no, tell them to read 1 Thessalonians 4:11 and wish them a nice day as you slowly close the door -- with a wry yet regrettable smile on your face. Try not to laugh until they are gone. And remember this: there are some rare elders (like I was, not bragging, I promise) who really did care and did not think of the "encouragement" visits as "stalking". We were genuinely concerned if we did not see someone. It wasnt about "numbers" with us, it was about looking out after our fellow human beings. Try not to be too hard on the genuine ones.

    Not much help probably, just my 2 cents worth from snake...

    SnakesIntheTower (of the Lazy Sheep Class)

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    Delay tactics: be polite, warm, grateful for their help even. "Thank you for coming by, I'm sorry I'm not well so I can't have you in. I've been depressed lately. It's an issue that is personal to me and I feel like I need to deal with this on my own. But I am very grateful for your help, take care now, bye."

  • TG-Jasper
    TG-Jasper

    They were very determined not to let me fade into the background. I ended up moving to the other side of town. My mother stil sometimes gives out my number to jws even tho i have asked her not to and i stopped going about 5 years ago. I still get jws turning up at my door, i never answer but sometimes my housemate does if he doesnt realise who they are and they get very agro about things. I have been putting it off but now for various reasons i think it will be safer to just disassociate myself. I mean...my mother is going to be forced to basicly disown me anyway so who gives a dam.

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    Welcome TG-Jasper!

    Please feel free to post your own thread about who you are and why you're here. We all love a good story here.

    V665V665

  • nolongerwaiting
    nolongerwaiting

    Welcome TG-Jasper!!

    NLW's wife

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