Advise please...

by tapout1 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • tapout1
    tapout1

    I'm new here. Left the org about 4 years ago. Cheated on ex-wife, confessed had JC done but was not kicked out. Went on my way, moved from Mexico to the States 3 yrs ago. For some odd reason I still feel guilty about things (about the org), it's like I don't enjoy my freedom much. I used to tell ex wife after I baptized that everytime they asked for more and more. I don't understand a lot of the things being spoken about here. I still think that people in the org are genuinely ok. I'm not saying I'd go back, I just want to understand. Also, I believe no group or organization is perfect, so why rip on the JW's. I'm not trying to be argumentative, just want to understand. I was baptized for maybe 2 years before I left and I have mixed feelings. If anybody has any opinions please let me know. I feel like I have a big weight on my shoulders and I need some help. All of this became stronger when a sister came to knock on my door and I accepted the magazines. It's BS, I don't know why I feel like this. Was (is) it part of mind/group control? What the heck??? I'm always feeling guilty about one thing or the other... it just won't let me be.

  • Zico
    Zico

    Welcome to the board tapout!

    'Was (is) it part of mind/group control? What the heck??? I'm always feeling guilty about one thing or the other... it just won't let me be.'

    Yes, it is the mind control, and most people have struggled with it, it's nothing to worry about, it's normal for ex-JWs.

    I think you'll find most people here believe a lot of JWs are, individually, good people, it's the Organisation itself they have the problem with, the Organisation has caused a lot of hurt.

    You've come to the right place tapout, perhaps you should stick around, as this place has helped a lot of people to deal with those feelings of guilt.

  • What-A-Coincidence
    What-A-Coincidence

    Welcome!!!

    Was (is) it part of mind/group control? What the heck??? I'm always feeling guilty about one thing or the other... it just won't let me be.

    Yes. Read "Combatting Mind Control" from Steve Hassan found in this link with other books.

    http://p071.ezboard.com/fthethinkingjehovahswitnessdiscussionforumfrm50

  • daystar
    daystar
    I still think that people in the org are genuinely ok.

    Many of them were and are, but they're influenced by an overly controlling and even cold-hearted organization. It's bound to rub off.

    Also, I believe no group or organization is perfect, so why rip on the JW's.

    Because, while no group or organization is perfect, the WBTS claims to be, if not perfect, the closest thing to it, governed by the Elect and guided, solely out of any other organization, by the Holy Spirit.

    So, while no organization is perfect, the organization which (with much hemming and hawing when the matter is pushed publicly of course) claims to be so should be held accountable for, ultimately, not being so in reality.

  • Chameleon
    Chameleon

    people "rip" on the WT because the WT "rips" on anyone that isn't a Witness, when the WT itself isn't exactly squeaky-clean.

    sorry daystar, i hadn't seen your post.

  • dedpoet
    dedpoet

    Hi tapout1, and welcome to the forum.

    Yes, the way you are feeling right now is due to the mind control that the
    jws exert on all their members. The watchtower use guilt as a weapon to
    keep their members in check, and gulty feelings can persist for many years
    after leaving, but they usually pass eventually, and you have come to the
    right place for help and healing, so please stay with us.

    I believe no group or organization is perfect, so why rip on the JW's.

    I agree with you, no group is perfect. However, most of us on this forum are
    ex jws who have been through the same watchtower-induced guilt feelings
    that you are now experiencing. We've been lied to and in some cases lied
    about by the wtbts, so a degree of anger directed at the organisation is quite
    understandable. I know many individual jws who are generally kind, loving
    people, though most of them shun me now. It's not individual witnesses that
    most of us on this forum vent about, it's the organisation that they are part of,
    in particular those at the top of the wtbts that make the rules that all jws are
    expected to live by.

    dedpoet

  • Gerard
    Gerard

    Read the articles on www.Freeminds.org

  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    hey man, first off, welcome to the board... ill tell you why someof us are bitter and why most of us dont believe that people in the org are not so good... they arent... alot of them take pains to hurt us... they do all they can to keep the cong under their thumb... and yes it was mind control.... read this... you might at least understand my plight

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/101870/1.ashx

  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    hey man, first off, welcome to the board... ill tell you why someof us are bitter and why most of us dont believe that people in the org are not so good... they arent... alot of them take pains to hurt us... they do all they can to keep the cong under their thumb... and yes it was mind control.... read this... you might at least understand my plight

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/101870/1.ashx

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    Also, I believe no group or organization is perfect, so why rip on the JW's. I'm not trying to be argumentative, just want to understand

    Dont be a sheep, figure out what you think or believe. People that like the dubs go to meetings. Some people that have issues with the dubs hang out here.

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