If you needed my background, this thread will tell it-
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/121888/1.ashx
My wife recently asked me about not commenting at a WT study.
Our discussion was the topic of this thread-
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/126485/1.ashx
She's been on alert since that discussion. Over the holidays,
she had some time off to visit family. I had business obligations so
I caught up with her a few days later. We had quite a discussion
while away from home.
Background- in her immediate family, she has a DF sister, mother and
father never got baptized as JW, but attend the cong. meetings. Other
siblings are never baptized, not JW at all. She has aunt and cousins who
are JW. Her DF sister has a daughter. My wife loves her niece, loves spending
time with her. The DF sister hooked up with a new boyfriend. While my wife
was visiting the family, that DF sister refused to come around and refused to
talk with family, answer the phone, etc. My wife would call and leave messages
saying how she would love to see her niece- messages piled up unanswered.
I arrived in town. I had a huge layover on my travels. I am currently reading
IN SEARCH OF CHRISTIAN FREEDOM which is a huge sized book. I decided to
put it aside and start reading RELEASING THE BONDS by Steve Hassan. I carried
that book with me.
Okay, discussions start. My wife tells me how her sister won't take her calls and let
her see the niece. I answer by saying "Could she be mad that you shun her?"
"Well, there's a principle involved."
"Your parents talk to her, your siblings talk to her, the only one who shuns her is you."
"They aren't JW's."
"Your JW aunt and cousins all talk to her. How is she different from your worldly
siblings?"
"She got baptized and knows better. She made no efforts to come back."
"Not true. I talked with her elders many years ago.(while I was an elder elsewhere)
They said she tried to come back, but we denied her after her first request, so she
just stopped coming to the Hall. She got baptized as a teenager because her friends
were getting baptized."
"If she got baptized, it's because she wanted to serve Jehovah. If she wasn't able to
live up to the dedication, the elders should have stopped her or her parents."
"Your parents are not JW's. They didn't stop you or her as teens. The elders didn't
even consider making her wait. She's living the same lifestyle as your siblings and
the only difference is that she made her mistakes after baptism, while your siblings
held back. You talk to them. She might be tired of your shunning, only wanting to see
Niecy, perhaps her new boyfriend encouraged her to withhold the girl."
Wife in JW overload, changes the subject-
"So what did you do on your business travel and layover?"
I do not believe in telling lies to the wife. If I am asked questions, I will answer.
If I wanted to mislead, I could have said I looked at magazines and JW literature.
(I did have those with me.) If I had been reading Ray Franz, I would have ducked the
question, still letting my wife know that I was ducking, so that I wasn't deceiving her, but
just didn't want to be DF'ed for my answer. I decided to try total truth with an opportunity
for her to stop questioning at any time.
"I was reading a book."
"What book?"
"RELEASING THE BONDS. It's about using the freedom of your mind."
"Using the freedom, how?"
"By removing the negative influences that prevent you from independent thinking."
"What negative influences?" (She wants to know, she wants me to say.)
"There are influences on people that control their behaviour, information available
to them, their thinking, and their emotions. They prevent independent thinking and
want you to just accept what they say."
"I still don't understand. What exactly is the book about?" (I gave her the opportunity
to stop. She did not stop.)
"The book is about mind-control cults and their danger."
"Do you think JW's are a mind-control cult?" (Many JW's would automatically assume
they had to defend the WTS on this subject.)
I only duck enough to avoid a direct answer. "They do seem to fit the profile."
We discuss back and forth for awhile on this subject.
She says "There are some basic Bible truths that I know only JW's preach. They say that
the Bible doesn't teach Hellfire and they proclaim the good news thru-out the earth."
"I can agree about the Hellfire doctrine, but other religions tell the good news. The guys on
downtown corners with a microphone telling the gospel are copying the apostle's example
more than our door to door witnessing."
I will post this and continue the story in my next entry.