by crazito 21 Replies latest jw friends
Do think because she is "worldly".................. she is this way?
There are just as many "nut jobs" and "bad marriages" in the org. has out......................
You did marry this girl ..............after meeting her just 24 hours before .........................
If you had married any witness girl after just meeting them after 24 hours.................Your marriage would still have a 99% chance of failure!!!!!!
Think about it.............................
I suggest you watch a great movie called Mail Order Wife:
http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=70027123
It's presented as a real documentary, but it is actually a Mockumentary that is very hilarious.
Essensially everything that happened to you also happened to the main characters in Mail Order Wife.
My advice: Wise up and have nothing to do with that woman. She is a user and is taking you for a ride. Just file her under your list of other psycho chicks.
She says she needs "time alone" but I think you are the one who needs time alone. Loneliness is not cured by trying to "save someone from a poor country and a bullying boyfriend. It is a recipe for further loneliness.
Why not take some time to get to know yourself and what kind of person you are really looking for? Try meeting people in person-through your workmates and friends, by volunteering in a hospital or charitable organization. Have as your goal making friends. Friendship can and often does blossom into love by getting to know the person.
What is the rush? If you were buying a new car you would undoubtably look at consumer reports, take test drives, etc. instead of settling on just anything. This is a mate we are talking about here. You need someone compatable, not the next one who takes a bit of interest in you.
You need time to build your self esteem, also, probably. I'm sure it has been a blow to you that your "friends" and wife that were witnesses were less than sterling examples. Perhaps take some college courses or Tech school training to build you up.
You deserve better than you are giving yourself!!!!
In or out of the society, you have to keep your head.
A wife is not a child. You are not responsible for her future. She has gone back to her bad boyfriend TWICE. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me". Learn from your mistake, and let this woman go to her foolishness.
Run!!!
That is the issue. Although it was an erroneous marriage to begin with, what's done is done and I feel totally accountable to God (not the watch) to now make this marriage work... to me this is like a teenage girl becoming pregnant out of wedlock and taking responsiblity for her baby as it is still sacred regardless of how it was conceived...
Huh? Teenage girl? Pregnant out of wedlock? Dude, she married you (i.e. played you) in order to get a quick VISA to the States. Thats all it was, and making this issue into a "religious" issue or bringing "god-guilt" into the equation is like trying to put a fire out with gasoline.
This is a practical issue, not a theological one. Take advantage of this loophole and run far far away from this chick.
Before you run like the wind, find out where she lives so that you can serve divorce papers; next find a good divorce lawyer, particularly one that can handle cross border matrimonial issues. You could try to get the marriage annulled but I dont like your chances. Divorce is probably the easiest option but take some action to protect your assets before you mention the D word. Once everything is protected then hit the using bitch with the divorce proceedings.
Scriptural issues have no bearing in this matter; get out as quick as you can.
DB74
THANK YOU ALL!! I will ponder on all of your responses... :)
ps - next time don't rush into marrying someone you have only courted online. It's lunacy to marry someone after only meeting them in the flesh the day before.
C,
What makes you think "worldly" people are bad? I was raised a JW, and it seemed every guy/girl I knew was suspected of cheating. I married a non-JW, and he is the most loyal and kind person I could have ever wanted. My dad
Plus, marriage and unborn fetuses are not sacred. You have to make yourself happy, and if a spouse or an embryo is standing in your way, get rid of it. Ditch that insane chick. She is making you sad, and she is using you. Please go get an HIV test ASAP as well, because you might have caught something from her that she caught from the ex.
You should date a real person a little while before committing. Ask a friend/co-worker to hook you up.
Make sure you talk to a lawyer before even mentioning it.
Remember, worry about your feelings before hers, because your happiness is your responsibility!
Take care!
