Again My Brother Writes

by geevee 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • geevee
    geevee

    Hi, I had a thread a while back about an email that my brother wrote me. Mostly the prepackaged JW hoohaa that you would expect and most have had on this board.
    I have been plaguing him for some family info, not the indepth stuff, just some general chit chat.
    SO: Last Night I got thhis one:
    Hi Geevee,

    We have been on holidays for the week. Good fun.

    I have got a couple of e-mails over the past few months.

    Over the past few months I have heard a number of rumours that you have started to do a few things at odds with the truth. Things like you have celebrated christmas last year with a tree in the window, birthdays, and that you are almost apostate in the way that you treat the Brothers and Sisters in Hometown. Speaking things to keep them away from the meetings.

    If these are true or not please tell me. If they are true you must see that my loyalty needs to stay with the Creator. it is that simple.
    The people I have spoken with are people that I trust. Not just those in the truth either(christmas stuff from outside), I think you need to know that.

    When we left Hometown you need to know that I already knew about alot that took place within your book study group. the stand up and walk out. I find that really strange. I also new that your family had stopped going to meetings. even typing this I almost feel like crying because I think about the respect you have lost from others but also from me. I would have given alot to have had the Vee boys on the same elder body.

    The situation if you have left the truth makes things very hard. I think that is quite plain, and without wanting to argue about what has and is your choice I also choose to stay with the truth.

    If you ever want to change your mind then I will give you as much support as I possibly can but really until then there is not much that I can do.
    I love you, I love your wife and I love the boys. But it must be faith first. that is the only thing that puts everything into perspective and focus in life. I still get very sad when I think about the probability of life in the new system without them or you both.
    Little Bro.

    So.........after first fuming, I guess that he is taking the time again to inform me of his "position" and in some way, JW twisted way, he cares.

    My reply:Hi Little Bro,
    Thanks for replying.
    Yes holidays can be lots of fun, and you guys need to get in as much as you can while you can!! Did you get to any theme parks? Some are better than others, last time we went up there we went to two and had a great time at them both.

    Little Bro, in emailing you from time to time, all I ask from you is a little courtesy. As I have tried to say, we get so many people ask about all of you. All I want is a little info every now and then, so that I can share it with them. You said it when you rang and told me about your wife being pregnant, that you would keep us informed.

    You know, I really don't know where your people are getting their information from. If you are for real, then you are going to have to be a whole lot more specific than hearsay.
    A Christmas tree and so forth, really? Like we would be that stupid, as if we would put things like that in the window. Just think about it for a minute, instead of running with every little piece of BS that people say to you. Would you do that? Say if for some reason you stopped attending, would you put a tree in your window for all to see? Knowing full well that elders or anyone could call around any time and see it and you would automatically get the boot?

    If people are that concerned, these people need to express their concerns to me, not go slandering us all over the place, thats what the bible says doesn't it? I suppose if some one doesn't go to meetings, then the one who does go is more believed, no matter how slack they may be.

    They may have to show us the so called evidence. If people dont really know what is going on, then they like to fill in the gaps dont they? Some people seem to be so good at trying to manage other peoples lives while making a mess of their own.
    Maybe it was them who sent the elders around here all, expressing their concerned after a year and a half ! They said "Just come to see how you are getting on.....small talk, small talk......oh....there is a couple of things we'd like to clarify......"
    Thats a lie isn't it? Come to see how we are, but they also happen to be two elders investigating the depth of accusations, about who knows what from who knows whom? Not really interested in how we are, just looking for some dirt. Christ would be having a fit!

    As far as my/our treating/mistreating witnesses in Hometown, again, where do you get your info? We are always friendly to the ones that we see, in fact we go out of our way to talk to them. Some choose to turn their backs and walk away. Which is a fine Christian thing to do isn't it, it shows the depth of their concern. But it is still their choice and I can respect that. I have been that ignorant in my life too.
    I dont know what we are supposed to have said that would be interpretted as trying to prevent them from going to meetings, I realized that it is a persons choice as to whether they go or not. We keep our opinions to ourselves. Again, they may have to put up or shut up.

    When you left town, you had sat in the same room as me for two months and you would have known on the very night that I got up and walked out and yet you chose NOT to ask about why I walked out of the bookstudy. If the conductor chooses to sit there and lie and others are happy to sit there and agree with him, then it is up to them, but I couldnt stomach it or justify it, so I left. You said it yourself one day, nobody makes you go. Maybe you are ok with supporting pedophiles, but I am not. You might be happy to have the society spend hundreds of thousands of dollars defending their right to be able to hide these people with in the organization. Money that has been donated by little old ladies who believe that it is going to the world wide work, helping out some poor people in some third world country, yet the society spend it on expensive lawyers like it doesnt matter.

    As far as my family is concerned, again, you sat there for ever how long you were concerned for, and I would know that you were concerned by ........?

    So what else supposed to have occurred at the book study? I kept my end up for a long time.

    People have very little to do with thier time, but slander and gossip about someone else, I suppose it makes them feel better about themselves. If people want to know something, why dont they ask instead of pretending you dont exist?
    Faith is something that should not be blind. You cant excuse things just because one might say I need to just show faith, then it will be OK. Didn't the Pharasees think that they were showing faith, they thought they were doing all that god asked of them and more, but when Christ came, they were left in the cold.

    Just out of interest, and I am not saying that we do, but if celebrating a birthday is such a taboo, thare must be some very strong scriptural instruction against it. Like you know in 1 Cor 6 it warn\s against all kinds of things that would prevent you from entering the kingdom of God, so it must also be with the celebrating of a birthday. If you check your elers handbook, what are the things that a person can get disfelowshipped for? You may be surprised, but celebrating a birthday is not one of the Check it out about page 92 onwards. Even WT articles say "mature" christain would not celebrate.....What about in the early chapters of Job, 1:1-5; 3:1-3; his family used to get together to celebrate their day, and he was a man of great faith.

    So, instead of trying to force me to do what you want me to do with all sorts of emotional blackmail, just be my brother. Surely we have more in common than just religion. You spent time in the same womb as me, thanks to the same sperm donor as me.
    Christ does the judging, he is the one who reads hearts. Human judgement is flawed from the start. I am not going to argue with you about this, as far as I am concerned I have said enough, and I understand the way you see the situation the way you do, but know this, that if in 1 year or 2 years or 5 years or 10 years or 20 years or 40 years [I will be pretty old by then] you want to have some kind of friendship/relationship, I am there, with the door open and a coldy in the fridge.
    Take Care,
    Love,
    GeeVee



  • LovesDubs
    LovesDubs

    Its amazing isnt it? That our own flesh will sooner believe others than come directly to us with their concerns? And that they would not give us the names of our accusers even tho the bible says we are entitle to face them? And that gossipping and slandering are sins?

    And that they can just dismiss and destroy their relationships with us as if it was just a breeze.

    My whole family on both sides, Dubs, exdubs and neverdubs....are so divided from each other over this facockta religion that we may never see the light of day again as a family.

    I feel for you...you replied very well...and more calmly than I would have. :)

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    I enjoyed your letter to your brother. Good job! It was interesting the things he was willing to accept as fact. I am glad you set him straight w/o compromising your position.

  • geevee
    geevee

    Thanks. My reply was formulatted over several hours ending at about 1.30am. I had to pound the keys for a while, edit and re-edit, then delete any thing to personal about any dub or dubz as a group. Thats why I say "people" this people that....meaning Witnesses.
    He is very self righteous. Has been all along, but i tried to keep the personal attcks out as much as I could......save them for later, but there are some good ones that I may use if I deem it necessary...last resort stuff as a reminder that he is NOT perfect.
    Take Care.

  • BrentR
    BrentR

    At least you have some communication. My two sisters have not spoken to me for over a year. The last time I saw and spoke with them was at our family reunion. It may have been because they had to since I was there. They won't answer emails and brush me off when I call them on the phone. I have never tried to discourage them from the JW's or talk negatively about the religion.

    I was never DF'd or ever attacked thier religion in thier presence. But they have completely disowned me. It is very sad but I will always do my part to keep the door open and be available.

    Your letter was very well put together and a JW can read an email w/o anyone finding out they are communicating with you.

    It always blows me away how un-christ like they can be all the while professing to be a Christian. I cannot believe that my mom is still with them either. She has had so many rumors and false accusations thrown at her over the years by other JW sisters and yet she still keeps going back for more.

    They are truly brainwashed.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    Good letter. You stayed above board and it is usually better to take the high road with people. To shun a brother over false accusations is so unloving. It only proves that they teach commands of men as doctrines and judge others as they were told not to by Jesus.

    When I think of all the ruined families because of this cult, I am overwhelmed with sadness. It is so cruel and unloving. When the scriptures say that your own enemies will be persons of your own household, I don't guess they realize it is talking about them. I long for the day when I can get together with all of my children and their spouses and children. But I am afraid it will never come. When I tell other people about the policies of shunning, they cannot even believe this happens in a so-called Christian religion and a free country.

    I feel sorry for those under the mind control, but the ones that enforce this policy will some day answer for this.

  • geevee
    geevee

    Choosing Life and BrentR,
    Thanks for your comments too. It is frustrating to say the least when you cant have an honest discussion with family over how you feel and what you have learned about the wts. It can get heated or they switch off and stare into the corner and then change the subject and report you to the elders.
    We can only be there when and if. But by the same token, we have wasted enough precious time on the BS. Our lived need to be lived with or without them.

  • jwfacts
    jwfacts

    I hope things work out ok. Unfortunately he sounds hardcore JW, so nothing is likely to make him understand that a person can worship the Creator without having the WTS as the intermediary. It appears that the most you can hope for is occasional contact.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Blood is thicker than water - but is it thicker than 'spirit'? That is the question.

    Nice response Geevee. I hope you broke down a bit of the wall.

    Jeff

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    G'day geevee! How are you this hot and windy Sunday?

    Thx for sharing the emails - pretty typical, eh? Sad but true.'They' never cease to amaze me at their illogical arguments.

    This seemed to be a classic!

    you have started to do a few things at odds with the truth. Things like you have celebrated christmas last year with a tree in the window, birthdays, and that you are almost apostate in the way that you treat the Brothers and Sisters in Hometown. Speaking things to keep them away from the meetings.

    If you had celebrated xmas, how does that stand with "you are almost apostate"? Huh?

    Frankly, he doesn't sound too bright!

    As you rightly refute, the argument that you are "treat(ing) the Brothers and Sisters" in a bad way is gross slander when there were no facts to support it. But then again, when did they ever need facts? And as for "speaking things to keep them away from the meetings"....well! In truth, they've pre-judged you and the situation - they beleive any bad story simply because it fits what they've already decided. You'll never be able to do anything right (in their eyes).

    Resign yourself to the fact that all sorts of bad and nefarious things will be 'credited' to you behind your back. It's what powers the WTS - hate.

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