I had an interesting opportunity/experience today. My family and I went out for breakfast. Afterwood we went browsing in the shops...pre-christmas.
After we purchased some items I see a man and his wife and two small children walking along. I instantly recognise him and move across to say hello. Shook his hand and then he introduced us to his wife and children.
Remarkable in the fact that I was one of the three elders who disfellowshipped him and fairly shakey grounds and have felt bad about it since and especially so after realizing that the whole thing is a crock of %#*t.
He was being extra cautious...as you would as to my actions. His wife had to take one of the children to the parents room in the shop, so I got to tell him striaght up that we dont go any more. He was astounded to say the least. We had a fairly rapid fire conversation from that point, as you do when you meet a fellow JW survivor.
I had the opportunity to apologize to him for what happended. I have felt pangs about this guy periodically, but he moved away and I didnt know where he ended up, so even though I wanted to say I was sorry, I didnt think I would ever get the chance in this life time. He absolutely bore no malice! He felt that we all did what we did because of the circumstances, just the cult mentality at work. He found himself free and being DFed gave him that chance to start again and build a better life which he is doing.
I told him I have felt sick about it all, but he was OK with it!!!
I have felt blown away all day!
Just thought that I would share that.
That is a great story! I am sure you must be relieved to know that he is doing well. What a gift you received to be able to talk to him and express your regret, and for him to forgive. It must have made you feel very good. That was a very nice gesture on your part to approach the man, not knowing what might come from it. That must have been a gulp and deep breath moment when you saw him. I admire you for your actions.
You don't need to feel sorry anymore, now you realise that your actions helped free him from cult mind control. JWs do not realise that d/f ing is assisting the demise of the organisation faster than just about anything else that they do.
Geevee, that was a good story. There is nothing like making ammends for a past wrong. I did the same when I left and called a lady that I had helped disfellowship about 12 years prior. She accepted my apology and then I told her it was her out of state, JW brother-in-law who ratted her out in a letter he sent to Brooklyn. I felt better when I gave her that information.
What a wonderful experience.
Good for you. Every once in a while we get to put one in the "win" column. This certainly qualifies for that.
that is good news indeed.
That is one more thing you can let go and feel peace.
Geevee thanks for sharing that. I've been off and on this board for some time now but have rarely noted experiences to do with how the Elders personally felt about disfellowshippings. Good ending, where two decent human beings can connect once they've shed the clothes of the cult.
that's great! it's good he moved on with his life. you never know if people will after being disfellowshipped. but maybe with the information available online now, the number of disfellowshipped people still believing will go way down, and the numbers of disfellowshipped people learning what they were involved with, and how to move on, will increase. so it's good you talked to him, and the apology seemed to help you more than him, but I'm sure he felt good about hearing that too, got some closure.