by katiekitten 34 Replies latest jw friends
Another womans husband?
Could you call that an addiction? It would probably feel like one, but would it attract the same kind of empathy as a different addiction? Would we bless it with the medical definition and attendant 'be let off the hook free' card?
If we were not married to addicted person it would be a whole lot easier to say it was a medical addiction, than if we had to personally live with the far reaching consequences.
Hi Katie,
It is important to understand how 12 step programs define addiction. The answer may suprise you. If it was strictly a morality or will power issue than most people would kick the addictions and that would be the end of it.
There are people who when they drink or drug to excess do things (as an example:have sex with anyone) that they under normal circumstances would never in a million years do. So there are a great many people who when the addiction is lifted, resume a fairly normal life that doesn't include that type of behaviour.
Unfortunately, you have people who come out in public and blame their addiction for their behaviour. In the recent US scandal. a gay congressman was found to have been propositioning teenage pages for sex. His spin doctor came out and said he was molested as a teen and was an alcoholic ergo that is why he wants to mount teenage boys. This was an ongoing problem that occured many, many times. This is a horrible distortion. It is an insult to gays and it is an insult to alcoholics. Most 52 year old gay guys who drink to excess do not go out and try to molest teenage boys.
A 12 step program approaches addiction from the standpoint that it is a problem of the mind, body and soul. Physical, mental, spiritual. When someone quits cold turkey, they may successfully conquer one area but not all three. (Maybe you know of people who have quit drinking for a month, but walk around like a miserable SOB because while they have removed the physical they are preoccupied and are unprepared to deal with the mental thoughts of not drinking. They throw up there arms and resume drinking again.). Those fortunate people who following a 12 step program and deal with the physical, mental and spiritual aspects have a better chance of long term success and more importantly a better quality of life afterward.
It's imporatnt to seperate psychological addiction and chemical dependence. Then just to confuse matters even more, there are psychological addictions which produce chemicals in the brain we find addictive such as addiction to heavy exercise and endorphine producing extreme sports. I think the worst possible scenario are chemical addictions which affect brain chemistry to produce widthdrawl symptoms which includes alcohol. The addict returns to drinking to alleviate the "feelings" produced by widthdrawl - that is the nature of addiction.
For the reasons stated above...it is very difificult for people to quit cold turkey on their own through sheer will power. A good 12 step group provides support and guidance.
Just my 2 cents
Another womans husband?Could you call that an addiction? It would probably feel like one, but would it attract the same kind of empathy as a different addiction? Would we bless it with the medical definition and attendant 'be let off the hook free' card?
I feel that that would be more of an obsession than an addiction, though I imagine the two feelings are similar in nature, and in potential consequences.
Just to throw in another random thought into the thread... I'm currently giving up smoking using the drug Zyban. Isn't it interesting that taking a chemical can suddenly change behaviour by altering brain chemistry \ blocking affect of the addictive substance. Kind of makes me feel that what we do is the product of chemicals floating about in us rather than always being the product of rational thought.
Just to throw in another random thought into the thread... I'm currently giving up smoking using the drug Zyban. Isn't it interesting that taking a chemical can suddenly change behaviour by altering brain chemistry \ blocking affect of the addictive substance. Kind of makes me feel that what we do is the product of chemicals floating about in us rather than always being the product of rational thought.
Just helped a friend successfully taper and completely withdraw from an addiction to Xanax. She is blind and had a chronic pain condition and was prescribed Xanax for panic attacks. It worked like magic for a couple of months. But what happens as the body becomes addicted is that as the drug wears off it produces the very effect it is supposed to control. So she was going through withdrawel and having severe panic attacks on a daily basis. To successfully withdrawel you have to do a slow taper to allow the body's natural chemicals to once again take over and moderate the system. Two months later, she is like a new person.
I think it's very difficult for society or people to understand other people's addictions. For example, I found it extremely easy to loose weight when I needed to. I don't really understand people who say they can't loose weight and appear to be eating all the time. However, I have had trouble with drink binges over the years and some people would scorn that this is mearly a matter of self control
I just saw a report on tv about obesity and over eating. They showed that ones who are obese have less connectors in the brain, so they have to eat more to feel satisfied. Eating produces chemicals in the brain that make you feel good, plus it is instant satisfaction once you start. Then when you feel bad after the high you become depressed, thus needing to eat more, its a cycle just like other addicitions.
I believe that addicitive personalities are passed from generation to generation. My grandfather was an alcoholic, my brother struggles with drug addiction(heroin), not to say you can't stop the cycle, but you are more prone to be one.
What is the nature of addiction?
Dependency!
attendance at 5 meeting a week.
Katie if you really think you are struggling with an addictive personality and want to know more about it here is a good link with lots of info that might help you:
http://www.indiana.edu/~engs/hints/addictiveb.html
One thing though to think about is all behaviors are a choice and as with all behaviors you can choose to do them or not. Sure it's hard giving up something your body has chemically become addicted to but it can be done if the desire to be free from the addiction is greater than the desire for the chemical. It's a choice don't let anyone tell you it's not.
Happy reading!
Addiction has to do with a failure of reality to penetrate the mind.
We substitute something as a replacement for what is real and true and actual.
There is, in effect, no Q &A allowed. It is like joining a cult in which no criticism of the ruling regime is allowed.
Things are polarized.
False reality.
What is the purpose of addiction?
Reward without earning.
Pay without work.
Theft, in essence.
