Were you afraid of what they thought about you in the Kingdom Hall?

by The wanderer 25 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  The wanderer

  Were you afraid of what people thought about you in the Kingdom Hall?

  Throughout my tenure as one of Jehovah's Witnesses, I could not help notice how individuals
  became so conscious of what others thought about them. It came to a point in which things
  that were said and done were carefully, almost, politically correct, in most if not all instances.

  Voting at the Kingdom Hall

  Every so often there would be a vote at the Kingdom Hall. Usually, when the circuit overseer
  came into town, there would be a vote to pledge a certain amount of money for his needs. Or
  when the Kingdom Hall needed a "facelift" a vote would be taken for that cause.

  Recalling one less than flattering incident

  After one of the Thursday night meetings, an announcement was made to take care of the ex-
  penses of the circuit overseer. This included his automobile insurance and his health insurance.
  The announcement was made and the vast majority held up their hands to pledge money out of
  their pockets and out of—mine.

  The Opposer Reveals Himself

  It was supposed to be a democratic vote, but when my hand went up to oppose the pledge
  the looks I received were ice cold. One sister made a point of letting me now how she felt
  about my position "YOU OPPOSED" was her expression. My reaction was " I thought this
  was a democratic vote"? "YOU STILL OPPOSED" she uttered. The good relationship was
  destroyed by my act of voting.

  Did you feel under pressure to "perform" while in the Kingdom Hall

  Personally, it never scared me to think or act differently than the "group think" mentality
  that I came across in the Kingdom Hall; but there were plenty who were fearful of what
  others thought about them.

  What about you?

  1.) Were you fearful about what others thought about you?
  
  2.) Did you hold back on how you felt about certain matters
  because you wanted to conform to the program?
  
  3.) What about on this discussion board, do you allow others
  to dictate the pace for you?

  Please add your commentary to this open-minded discussion

  Respectfully,

  The Wanderer
• 

  mama1119

  My Mom definitely cared what people thought of us. She really wanted my brother and I to have the right friends. I didn't care as much, although I tried too. I did care, however, that no one think I was "bad", and was very careful to avoid being labeled so. Then, later I just avoided anyone finding out I was bad, until I got DF.
• 

  MinisterAmos

  Let me just add an experience about voting, corruption and mind control.

  The PO of my foreign language congo was switched from an english congo about six months prior to this event. He had made a custom of flying a buddy in from Bethel (just a regular Dub) to host the memorial, put him up with one of the Bros with a house on the Gulf of Mexico, and had always paid for the expenses out of congo funds.

  He decided to continue the custom but using the new foreign language congo. When it came to a vote I raised my voice and asked if I could ask a question. He glared at me and said yes so I asked if Brother Freeloader spoke XXXXX (the language of our congo.) Man I'll tell you he got hot! Steam rose from his little bald spot and he had to admit that (ahem) the Bro would have to give the mmorial in English but that he, Bro PO, would translate.

  My tactic must have worked somewhat because 5 or 6 other people voted against the proposal. It was the first time anyone had ever voted against any issue raised from the pulpit.
• 

  Star Moore

  Yes to all the above.

  I was afraid...that the local needs talk would somehow be about something I said or did wrong.

  I was afraid to get taken to the back room, about something I did wrong..

  I was afraid to make friends..for fear they would see an imperfection and report me.

  I was afraid to be removed from the pioneer list.

  etc, etc, etc...an ATMOSPHERE OF FEAR FOR SURE
• 

  OpenFireGlass

  Were you afraid of what people thought about you in the Kingdom Hall?

  HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!!!!

  No, I was more afraid of the ass whoopin' I was going to get when I got home from the hall...
• 

  buffalosrfree

  At times, my wife seemed to care more about what the fellow r&f at the hall thought about dress etc. , than what we the rest of the family thought about it. She seemed forever to be worrying about what others might think, she didn't want me to make comments that weren't exactly written down in the paragraphs. I never listened to her and told her many times I could give a rats ass as to what brother or sister whomever thought about what i wore, how i answered or anything else for that matter.

  My children when they grew up and left home were quick to tell her this, but she is and was oblivious about it, she only thought about the things that were important to her. She never sat and realized that she had no true friends in this particular group of people. Most of them were people who only liked those in their particular cliques. She is only now really starting to realize this. better late than never I guess.
• 

  Juniper123

  Yeah I could never get when I read the literature about how we were so much better than Christendom because there were no rivalries or petty jealousies in our congregations, and we all got along and love, love, loved each other and how this was illustrated with dozens and dozens of carefully staged photographs. And then the reality than in my KH at least were some of the meanest, pettiest people imaginable that smiled at you while making a list of everything they thought wrong with you.
• 

  Zico

  Wanderer,
  
  Why did you oppose the CO money?
• 

  The wanderer

  I opposed the C.O money because at that time, I
  did not even have health insurance and I did
  not feel I should be paying for someone else's
  who was not even related to me and that dropped
  in once or twice a year.
  
  Respectfully,
  
  The Wanderer
• 

  blondie

  When I was younger, I worried more about making other people happy. But I found that what made one happy, made another unhappy. I tied myself up in knots trying to make everyone happy. I realized that if I wanted some kind of sanity, I had to focus on what I saw in the Bible that God wanted for me, without filtering it through the opinions of people at the KH. That wisdom probably kept me in the WTS longer but it kept me sane and it was one step out of the WTS control.

  There is such a climate of backbiting, gossiping, and lying in the Borg; and that among the so-called "mature" JWs. There were some that only took the knife out of my back to stick in someone else's.

  The thing to remember if you follow "Pharisees" you will end up in the pit with them. The Bible said to follow Jesus' footsteps closely.

  Blind guides is what they are. If, then, a blind man guides a blind man, both will fall into a pit

  Blondie