Aftermath of DA letter-what to expect?

exwitless

I already posted this question in the middle of my previous topic, but I think I buried my question there. I would like to hear some more experiences from those who DA'd themselves regarding the immediate "aftermath" (specifically with the elders). Neither my husband nor I have any JW family. Any "heads-up" from you experienced ones would help us a lot. We took our DA letter to the post office today. We are nervous and relieved at the same time.

Moomin

Hi, I printed my d/a letter out and then signed it. It was very short and sweet with a cheery tone.

About a month later 2 elders came to my door and my unbelieving husband answered it. They wanted to know if it was really me who sent the letter. He told them that their org is a joke and not to return.

I was looking from the window at the time and could see one elder that I knew and the other I didn't. I do remember someone pointing him out to me as being the elder who deals with wrongdoers by counselling them.

They were all suited and booted and had the bible in their hands. I was so annoyed that they had obviously planned to see me and prepared themselves, but had not given me the same opportunity.

When my husband answered the buzzer (we live in a flat), they wouldn't even say who they were, they just kept repeating that they needed to speak to me. It really creeped us out.

I had been taught on the ministry to always tell the people with intercoms who we are straight away so they don't become concerned wondering who is at their door or gate. They don't apply that when its one of their own.

I haven't heard anything since. That was earlier this year.

Congratulations fon leaving. Hopefully they won't bother you. Also, I had only gone back to the meetings at the 05 memorial and then baptized that July, they probably thought that I didn't understand the seriousness of my decision. :)

I hope everything goes well for you.

Moomin

fullofdoubtnow

I took my da letter to the kingdom hall and handed it to the po, to make sure it was delivered. He tried to talk me out of it, and delayed announcing me for a while, but I threatened to send a copy to the UK hq, along with a note on how uncooperative the local elders had been, and I was announced at the next service meeting.

They will contact you as soon as they receive it, and will probably ask you if you are certain, but eventually they will announce it. If you have any problems, I think the threat I made about sending a copy to the bethel would work for you as well.

After the announcement, they will shun you.

BritBoy

I wish I had done this... I am still uncertain as to whether I have been DF'd or not... I simply faded. But I have heard rumours that I have been DF'd (without trial, which according to those in the know on this site is possible).... wonder how I can find out so I can DA myself?!!!

fullofdoubtnow

wonder how I can find out so I can DA myself?!!!

Hi Britboy,

You could always do what I threatened, and Trev actually did, and write a letter to the HQ in the UK. If you don't know the address, we have it. Just ask if you need it.

Linda

garybuss

The Witnesses disfellowshipped me without notifying me after I had not attended group sponsored meetings for 18 years. After they disfellowshipped me, they asked to borrow my tractor and mower. I think they forgot about my tractor and my appliance cart before they disfellowshipped me. This is a true story.

BritBoy

Hi Britboy,
You could always do what I threatened, and Trev actually did, and write a letter to the HQ in the UK. If you don't know the address, we have it. Just ask if you need it.
Linda

Linda, I am not sure if I am DF'd or not. If I have, it would have been in South Africa. I suppose while I am there in February I could try find out... but to be honest, I have to ask myself the question "Am I bovered?"

You're coming to the apostacurry right? We can discuss it all then!!!

fullofdoubtnow

to be honest, I have to ask myself the question "Am I bovered?"

Britboy, you don't seem bothered!

I suppose if you're in a differrent part of the world from when you were known as a jw, it doesn't really matter. I still live in the same area, and I da'd because I wanted out, and I didn't want the other jws bothering me. By doing that, I've had a nice, peaceful year, no pressure from elders or former friends, to get on with healing the wounds being a jw left. I needed to da, you probably don't really, so no worries.

exwitless

I am so hoping to be left alone by the elders. I just want to live my life without worrying about what Witness might be around seeing me buy Lucky Charms cereal and Easter Peeps! We stated in our letter to not call or come to our home because the decision was made and we were aware of the "consequences" of DA'ing. Do you think they'll actually comply?

isthisit

we wrote our letters, and delievered them at the same time to the elders and the people that counted. The elders came and asked if we understood the depth of what we were doing, that we were condemning ourselves to death and that we would not be able to see any of our friends again. After we answered we understood, and explained everything over again, they asked if we could pray together, we accepted, then they left. Some of our friends have never spoken to us, and with others we have pints in our old places, as if nothing has changed. We missed our first meeting the next night and went for a meal with some friends- they wondered why we were smiling so much, the thing is- they never knew we were witnesses, and the bigger thing is, if they did, they probably wouldn't have cared. Basically, expect feelings of elation, followed by periods down in the dumps, before you go back to elation. You lose a lot, but gain so much more.

Aftermath of DA letter-what to expect?

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