Please allow me to introduce myself...

by Asheron 35 Replies latest jw friends

  • Asheron

    Hello all,

    Please escuse the obvious Stones lyrical referance but thats the first thing that came to mind. I am a 44 yo Male fader from Pennsylvania. Been faded for 22 years or so and been lurking and reading all of your posts for 6 or so months. I recently began doing some research after renewing contact with my mother and brother (JW's both) whom I havent spoken with in over 15 years. Prior to getting married last year I wanted to try and "mend" our disfuntional family picnic and invite them to our wedding. At first it was heartwarming to share all of the life expieriances I have had over the last 15 years and introduce them to my new wife. We shared some dinners and nice times but that all came to a screaching halt when they realized that I wasnt interested in ever returning to thier world.

    It all happened when my brother told me he was going to go to Bethel. He is a full time pioneer. We got into it kinda deep for several hours and I used the "C" word (Cult) when referancing the JW's. I wasnt trying to offend but a friend of his that he dragged along to a mountain bike trip I had arranged for us to bond started in on me. I am sure he was brought along to make the -"where two or more are gathered...blah blah blah" -day more of a witnessing thing. The friend of my brother thought of himself as a "highly intelligent" "well read" "great thinker" even if he did say so himself. Needless to say all he spewed was WT drivel and my brother sat thier saying "uh huh" "he's right you know" "too true".

    I managed to keep my smile for 2 hours or so and then I cracked. Hit em with all the glaring errors in the JW reasoning and some of the history I now know. Of course they responded with "there are all kinds of rumors out there" and my brother dropped the "We dont follow men anyway" and the grandaddy "even if they are wrong its still the best place to be". I tried to retreat to a neutral corner several times but they just kept up with those false, Im interested in what you believe questions that are in fact questions looking for an opening to attack my beliefs.

    Since that day the phone calls have stopped and my Mother and Brother are very short on the phone and ussually just tell me any major updates (my Grandfather just died at 93 yo) and sign off with a "thats about it for updates". I think someone has dropped the word that I am not just a meek fader anymore and some meetings and "counselings" have occured.

    Whew....I just wanted to say hi and now look what I have done. Anyways, I want to thank all of you on this board for telling your stories and sharing your feelings. It has made the reopened wound a little easier to deal with.


  • BizzyBee

    Welcome - good story. Thanks for sharing it....More to come?

  • thecarpenter

    welcome to the board asheron, your tale is one that has been repeated many different times in many different ways, such is the world of a cult. Just grin and bear it.

  • Asheron

    Hi Bee,

    "More to come?"

    Ive got enought to fill a


    Welcome aboard....


  • sspo

    Welcome on this board

    If it makes you feel any better most of us are going or have gone thru the same thing

  • Asheron

    Thank you all for the welcomes. While it doesnt make me feel better that some of you have been or are going through this, it does make me feel less alone. My wife cant relate to this issue as much as she tries so I cant really talk to her in depth too often about it. I consider myself a fully realized man and I also believe myself to be realatively free of the old demons and fears but this family thing is a tough one to put down. The suitcases are light but the luggage is till there if you know what I mean.

  • grey matters
    grey matters

    Welcome Asheron.

    I laughed out lound when you mentioned the Stones reference. I wasn't sure that was what you were going for, but it popped right into my head.

    About the JW family, yeah, I know. You just can't reason with them. It seems like their religion is the only thing they consider to be important.

    What has helped me is to be close to non JW family - aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. I come from a big family. The members that are JW are significant to me, but they are not the majority of the family. I try to remember that to keep things in perspective.

  • katiekitten
    and the grandaddy "even if they are wrong its still the best place to be"

    How utterly frustrating. Its like banging your head ...

    Anyways welcome to the board. If your wife wasnt a dub its kind of hard to explain all the ins and outs isnt it? I find myself having to preface every 2 minute anecdote about 'why I hate the Witlesses' with a 20 minute explaination of doctrine and practise so that my partner gets the punchline!

    Looking forward to you filling up the server.

  • SPAZnik


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