Had dinner with some worldly friends, WTBTS is full of it

by thecarpenter 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • thecarpenter

    Just had dinner with some worldly friends and relatives and what a great time I had. It was sobering to think that I cut them out for so long and yet they are such nice people. We were conditioned to believe that they were bad influences and were demon possessed but actually are quite decent and church going people with real strengths and weaknesses like everyone else. Our conversations focused on religion, marriage, children, jokes, business, politics and a host of other things. They were well read and contributed important points to the conversation (quite a change from the usual dribble from my jdub associates). I am truly sorry to have cut them off for so long but it is great to have such company now.

    On a similar note, I am taking some hobby classes and met some really nice people (met a doctor, elementary school teacher, investment banker, musician, and many interesting people) during the sessions. Afterward, the teacher and some students put on a dance performance that was really cool.

    When I think back at the level of mind control in the congregation, it seems absolutely absurd that anyone would willingly put themselves under the control of these 12 guys in Brooklyn who supposedly possess the correct interpretation of worshipping God. Thinking about the policies the society has in place as well as the misguided doctrine, it is no wonder that there is such a intellectual void in the organization. The jdubs pay an enormous price to be witnesses of a publishing company, it's very sad. Unfortunately, the bOrg is not the only high control organization out there.

    Has your experience integrating back into society been this rewarding? I find myself looking forward to associating more with my newfound friends. I can't wait to start school again as well as checking out different nondenominational churches. This to me is what Jehovah intended his people to be like.

  • chuckie77

    Isnt it great when you realise that there are so many people in the "world" that are good, nice and caring people! Makes you wish you were allowed to discover them years ago instead of being told that they are all evil wrongdoers.

    I was lucky in some ways, unlucky in others. I grew up on a tiny Island where there were only a couple of JW families, so Ive always looked for my friends outside the organisation (which for my whole life is where ALL my true friends have come from). That said, going to school and everyone knowing that I was the JW kid whos dad was the one that knocked on all the doors "harassing" people was a bit ordinary at times!

    Even my mum now says that her true friends are her friends from outside the organisation.


    Couldn't agree with you more!!! Glad you had a nice time and found out how many nice people there are really are out there! As I had some close relatives that weren't JW's, I've always had some friends that weren't JW's. I owned a few businesses in a small town and so knew almost everyone and hung out with lots of people besides JW's all the time. It kept me sane...I think! LOL!


  • jwfacts

    I am embarrased to think of the ignorant view I had of others. I now have non JW friends that are wonderful people.

    As JWs we thought we were this special gifted group bringing a message of salvation. Our time at the doors was the great sorting work. I now find that the majority of people have no idea about the JW message, just view them as cooky book sellers.

  • aniron

    Likewise when I left and discovered that "worldly" people where not the demonic controlled people we were taught they are by the Watchtower. The vast majority are good caring people. I've seen more love and care from some rough, tough guys than from any JW brother. When the tsunami happened in the far east a couple of years ago. I saw groups of these "worldly" people off their own bat, collect money and clothes etc for the disaster relief. A few of them even flew out to help in Sri Lanka. What did local JW's do ?

    Also you can a damned good conversation on religion with a "worldly" person than any JW. Because they have a free mind, will question and argue. Not like the one-dimensional minds of JW's.

    I was have a real good conversation with my "worldly" friends on religion. I asked why didn't they do the same with JW's when they came to their doors. Most said that they didn't think standing on a doorstep was the place to do it. One comment was that when a JW calls, you're not in the frame of mind to talk religion, you have other things on your mind.

    As already mentioned , how many people really know what Jehovah's WItnesses believe? After nearly 130 years of "preaching" and the millions of WT publications. You ask a person what a JW believes and you usually get "They knock on your door and don't take blood" .

  • SirNose586

    This was one of my pet peeves too. Not to say that conversations with non-dubs were exponentially more enlightening or stimulating, it's just that I didn't have to sidestep any landmines with them. With the most hardcore dubs you can talk about...the weather...last sunday's talk...the last bookstudy...the last service meeting...service...how horrible the world is and HOW WE NEED THAT NEW ORD--NEW SYSTEM!!...etc. It gets better with your non-benighted dub...you can talk about non controversial movies, music, TV, local news, general national news. But nothing that you can sink your teeth into--nothing that you can argue passionately.

    I certainly hope the experience is mine alone, but one thing I really detest about talking with dubs is that you can't argue. Everything must be happy sunshiney wonderful unity. Sure, nobody's feelings get hurt, but during these bore-fest "gatherings," I want to leave within 5 minutes. I've heard the same puns, the same phrases, the same eyeroll-inducing humor. I've got an image to keep up though, so I endure it.

  • isthisit

    i was always "encouraged" to have friends in the congregation but my folks always understood that i wasn't content with just that.At Uni i had a wide and diverse circle. I always enjoyed my nights out with them far more than meetings. Likewise sitting down over a coffee with one or all of them was far more enlightening than anything i experienced in the hall. My family always used to make the argument that they weren't "real" and that when things got tough they would fall away. Funnily enough when my uncle died suddenly last april, and we had to travel to galway for the funeral, non of my JW friends made the trip (he was a very active one, with an unbelieving and lovely woman) two of them came up for the funeral. I love my real friends in the hall. :-) i'm just glad that the fact they were in the world never bothered me

  • aniron

    Some said above reminded me , how when a JW we were always told that when we had a get together or JW friends round for a meal etc. We should talk about "spiritual" things etc.

    I found that it was the las think you could get a JW to talk about. I've spent evening with Elders who came for a meal. Couldn't get them to talk about anything spiritual no matter how hard I tried.

    Learnt since becaue they are afriad to say anything out of order or can be taken the wrong way.

  • truthsetsonefree

    I have been having similar experiences. When I read Ray Franz's book I finally decided to do what he wrote about. Namely, not judging people by their religious affiliation, but rather by who they are. I had wanted to do that for so long, but had held back because of the WTs influence. It is amazing how they take the few unsavory things done by a few, magnify it and project it on every non-Witness. Further we were taught to think that these people were about to die. I was actually afraid to make friends for fear they would soon die. Sounds a little crazy perhaps but its true. I have also been astonished by the fact that some of my fellow elders are not of good character. In fact, in the average congregation it seems that the people considered 'weak' are often the most fun to be around, loving and likely to be loyal friends. Many an elder is more interested in organizational 'cleanness' and his title than anything else.

  • Arthur
    With the most hardcore dubs you can talk about...the weather...last sunday's talk...the last bookstudy...the last service meeting...service...how horrible the world is and HOW WE NEED THAT NEW ORD--NEW SYSTEM!!...etc.

    I felt the same way SirNose. I do relate to what you wrote. Conversations with militant JWs does continue to be an endless rehash of the "us vs. them" script.

    It basically boils down to the same old cliche, platitude laden pap:

    Jehovah's Witnesses: Good / Godly / Deserve the Paradise

    "Worldly" People: Bad / Satanic / Deserve to die

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