How do the elders deal with a very poor brother or sister?

by JH 45 Replies latest jw friends

  • Highlander

    My experience has been that here in the states, the wt corp AND the majority of individual j-dubs are not very generous in helping those in need.

    My experience in other countries, specifically, third world countries, I find that the j-dubs are very generous amongst eachother, however wt corp is not.

  • asleif_dufansdottir
    Then their non-JW relatives are supposed to help them.

    That always just *galled* me. Tell you to stay away from unbelieving family then expect them to bail you out.

    We were converts, no family in the bOrg. When we were studying and active my family was "a danger to our spirituality" but when we were destitute and didn't have a place to live, the elders actually met with us and told us to go to my family to live - knowing that we wouldn't have transportation to the hall or anything - and that my family would unceasingly pressure us to go to *their* fundamentalist church.

    That was the beginning of the end (and I think at least one of the elders knew it would be...he seemed to be very upset about the whole thing). We resisted going to church with my parents (I was so depressed I didn't want to go to a church or a hall of any kind) but it was a horrible time.

  • katiekitten
    All those brothers I helped in cleaning business for FREE, when I was working and didn't need money, ignored me completely when I suddenly lost my job.

    Yes but in fairness JH I bet you were never without a Watchtower or Awake to study, right?

    Jehovah provides brother, Jehovah provides!

    When I was a kid we were all pretty poor, no cars, no phones, no TV's. Then the C.O. or someone decided that we needed cheering up as a cong, and moved in a group of families from a nearby congregartion (I suppose they reassigned the cong borders because they were all from the same geographical area).

    It was a disaster. They were all really well off by comparison, not only did they all have a car but the mums had cars too. They went on holiday together, they used to stop in a hotel at assembly time. And they were utterly selfish to the last. But they never stopped telling us from the platform how generously Jehovah provided for us all!

  • MsMcDucket

    My mother was not a witness. She's just a regular old christian. Even though we were very poor, anyone was welcome to come over to the house and eat with us. One thing that I did hate was that she'd give her last dime to the church. And you know what? They always took it. I believe that there are cliques in every organization, religion, culture, or what have you. Then there are people who just don't give a damn about status, they just care about people.

    In response to your question. I think that the dubs felt that the poor ones in the congregation were supposed to "glean from the fields", which means if you have to go to the American Red Cross to ask for handout, then do it. Utilize all of "christendom's and Satan's secular organizations" to get by. Just don't be a burden on the congregation.

    I must reiterate that I do believe that there are truly loving and kind people in all religions, and that some of them truly feel as the song "Lean on Me". Which goes:

    Sometimes in our lives we all have pain
    We all have sorrow
    But if we are wise
    We know that there's always tomorrow

    Lean on me, when you're not strong
    And I'll be your friend
    I'll help you carry on
    For it won't be long
    'Til I'm gonna need
    Somebody to lean on

    Please swallow your prideIf I have things you need to borrow
    For no one can fill those of your needs
    That you don't let show

    Lean on me, when you're not strong
    And I'll be your friend
    I'll help you carry on
    For it won't be long
    'Til I'm gonna need
    Somebody to lean on

    If there is a load you have to bear
    That you can't carry
    I'm right up the road
    I'll share your load
    If you just call me

    So just call on me brother, when you need a hand
    We all need somebody to lean on
    I just might have a problem that you'd understand
    We all need somebody to lean on

    Lean on me when you're not strong
    And I'll be your friend
    I'll help you carry on
    For it won't be long
    Till I'm gonna need
    Somebody to lean on

    Lean on me...

    This song was written by Bill Withers (I think.). Anyway, I do know that he is the one that recorded it.

  • purplesofa

    I personally have received help many times in many different congos.

    I have come home and had food laid out on my kitchen counter, had bills anonomously paid, a collection taken to pay my rent, electricity, and once my convention trip.

    I was struggling and a sister from a JW internet site( that I never met) sent me money she made from a garage sale that was originally to send where the need is greater.

    I have never found the brothers and sisters anything but caring and giving in my observations.

    And I have helped out many myself when my circumstances allowed it.


  • DaCheech

    Purplesofa, I'm glad they helped you, but:

    I've been frequenting the same cong for 30+ years,I'm a MS and I'm in good standing to the eyes of all.

    Grant I'm not poor.... but It took me 1 month to get my house straightened out, and my family back in (6 weeks altogether). The day the floodwaters were lowering 2 brothers passed by to say hello.

    During the 4 weeks that I missed the meeting to clean up, the only other phone call I got was "hey dacheech, when are you coming back to meetings"?

    When this family's (JW) house burned down (1 mile from my house). during the next couple of days the local priest came by to help with necessities. these JW's refused and told the priest that they were already well taken care of by their brothers (JW). the truth was that their relatives were helping them (including free boarding). Zealots know how to change words, I'm sure he's gonna repeat this one on the next DC.

  • MinisterAmos

    Our congo passed a resolution to pay the plane fare of a friend of the PO from Bethel to the Gulf of Mexico so he could have a vacation. I thought that was very nice of us. We "needed" him for the Memorial for some reason, I'm not sure why.

    The brothers all took up a collection when the PO became so busy in the ministry that he didn't have time to work. Since his four daughters all all DF'ed, they could not provide assistance.

  • DannyBloem

    most of the time B) and they are right to do so.

    the social serurity is very well here.

    in a few cases that there were really problems, I remember that the congregation really helped. THe brothers and sisters were ask to donate some money, and most of them did. They really helped out that poor brothers and sisters


  • Forscher
    A) Tell them that the Organization is not a place to beg but to preach, to give and not to receive.

    That one's the closest of the choices. In the workforce I was something of a bottom feeder. Although I'd trained in a trade, most of the shops in that trade were little family outfits which concentrated more on keeping family members employed than anything. Since I wasn't family, I was the odd man out when times were lean.
    I remember one time when I was between jobs when I was hauled before a committee. When I went to that meeting I had two jobs lined up, it was going to be a week or so before I'd have one or the other for sure. That went right over their heads. As far as they were concerned I was lazy and that was it. so they weren't there to be of any help, they were there for the sole purpose of informing me that I was a man who "refused to support his own" and, therefore, the word was going to be put around the cogregation that I and my family were not to be given any help. To that point, I'd asked nobody for any help and didn't plan to. So much for their much vaunted love for their fellow Witnesses!
    My wife had helped clean house for one of those elders when his wife was sick. And he also expected the sisters of the congregation to provide cooked food for them as well. I gues that just like the government that elders couldn't abide any competion for the resources of the publishers.
    Later on, that elder went on disability. He owned two homes, still went out and did some work for money several times a year (I'll bet he didn't report that income to the SSA). He also expected the publishers of his cogregation to help them out with food, pay for his trips to assemblies, clean their house, etc.... I ended up on SSI and he very promptly put word around that there was nothing wrong with me and I was just too damn lazy to work and shouldn't be given any material help (as if I was going to beg for it any way). Nice fellow, wasn't he?

  • DaCheech

    no nepotism and lordshipping??????

    devil's got more love and justice

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