My sister in law was talking to me about birthdays yesterday. She was not raised a JW (Morman), converted in order to marry my brother. She had to take a stand with her family regarding BD and Christmas etc. It has caused her alot of heartache, not to mention headaches and stress with her family.
What she finds hard is that my mother (active JW) gives the kids BD presents. She is so confused! Here she is telling her family they cannot give the kids BD presents, but my JW mother gives them presents on their BD! Go figure.
She asked if this was something mom always did. In a way she did but not to the extent she does with the grand kids. We'd always get a "Have a nice day" card and a little gift. Nothing big, just a little token, and never wrapped like she does with the kids.
I feel for her, and told her that I don't think receiving a BD present from her parents is a bad thing. It will further hurt her mother and cause problems if she finds out the JW mother in law is giving gifts and she's not allowed. Hopefully in the future the kids will be getting gifts from both grandparents now. Or she has to go to the other extreme and tell my mom what she is doing is wrong and it's causing problems and she can no longer give the kids BD presents. I don't think she'd go that route. I hope for the kids she doesn't.