Question for Christians only

by Steve Lowry 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Steve Lowry
    Steve Lowry

    Ok, I got save in 1984 (left the WBTS 1979). I have always felt at a loss when it has come to the emotional impact aspect of Jesus' Sacrifice. What I mean to say is, that I have seen other Christians openly weep about Jesus and His Death on the Cross, while I have felt nothing. I've heard sermon after sermon about it with pastors getting choked up in the middle of their exhortation as their feelings of gratitude over take them. While I feel nothing. I think its because as a kid growing up a JW, the way I was taught to view Jesus sacrifice is that is was kinda like His job to do it. Like it was His job (or responsibility), to come to earth and die on the Cross. Doesn't that suck? I can't get in touch with any kind of emotion about it, and I've tried. Its like, what’s the big deal? In my mind this was what He was SUPPOSE to do. I wonder what is wrong with me sometimes? Has the Watchtower Society sucked even this feeling of compassion out of me? Or am I just a cold-hearted son-ofa-bitch? Yea yea, I know that because of His Sacrifice I now have the ability to commune with God, and I am grateful for that, very much so. But that kind of ‘special’ feeling of gratitude I have seen in other Christians (a definite reverence about it), I can’t seem to attain. It’s frustrating. It makes me doubt my faith and my own humanity. I truly think this is Watchtower related. It is presented to the JW in an unemotional way, as if this was Jesus meeting a job description. "Ok, I’m Jesus, and I go to earth and die on a Cross to save all mankind." The Watchtower makes it out to be a kind of mathematical equation. Adam sinned and lost communion with God. Jesus died to right that wrong. End of story. Maybe this is just another attempt from the Pit, to diminish Jesus and His Sacrifice? If there ever were a religion born out of Hell, the WBTS would be it, IMO.

    Well, I was just wondering if any other former JW’s could relate to my experience.

  • nicolaou
    nicolaou

    I am a former JW and I can relate to your experience. However, the title of your thread excludes me as I am no longer a christian. You are clearly sufferring under this 'trial of faith' and I have no wish to make things more difficult for you so I will leave you in peace.

    If you would like a different perspective on what you are going through you only have to ask.

    All the best,

    Nic'

  • Gordy
    Gordy

    Hi Steve

    I was a JW 1971- (DA'd) 2001 I became a Christian in 2000. Won't bore you with why I left JW's but it was pretty bad experience.

    I understand your feelings over Christ. It is only recently that I have begun to feel any emotion over what Christ did. Considering I attend a Pentecostal church where many do show such emotion. I felt I was standing on the sidelines for a long while, sometimes still do. I did put it down to my many years as a JW, that showing emotion in worship was just not right. Also as you say the Watchtower somehow dimished what Christ did as sort of He came, He died. Then you find that the central teaching of Christian faith is Christ came and died for us. From hardly being mentioned in a Kingdom Hall, to it being the main theme of Christian worship. So your mind has to make this change over and its difficult to do so.

    But does showing emotion for what Christ has done really mean we should break down in tears etc? Just because we see others doing so does it mean we have to be affected that way. Sometimes it maybe that a person gets carried away with the moment. I know others in the church who do not seem to show any outward sign of emotion. But it doesn't mean that deep down we don't have a deep love and appreciation for what Christ did. Just because you don't burst into tears or fall to your knees etc. I wouldn't let if bother you.

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    G'day Steve,

    As a JW I felt much the same as you, I just couldn't see the big deal about Jesus happy thirty 33 1/2 years being worshiped on earth followed by a short period of suffering and a quick trip back to heavenly glory . The Watchtowerm Society's 'ransom sacrifice' reasoning never made sense. I was moved to tears with the stories of the suffering in Malawi but not that of the suffering of Jesus of Nazareth.

    Perhaps it was meant to be that way. The last thing the WBTS wants is JW's actually feeling they have a retationship with a personal saviour.

    cheers, unclebruce

  • serendipity
    serendipity


    Hi Steve,

    Do you get emotional in gratitude over anything else? I don't get weepy about much at all, and don't feel deep, reverent, profound emotions thinking about Christ's death. I'm grateful but that's about the extent of it.

    I tend to think different personality types will experience spirituality in different ways.

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet

    I am going to temper my response as you seem a sincere and honest person and also because Nic has led the way in that respect.

    However if I had the choice between several hours of flagellation followed by a crucifixion or losing my family again which has given me years, months,hours, minutes of endless inside shrivelling agony of grief then I'd opt for the former. What Jesus went through was a walk in the park in my comparison. The torment of being treated as if you are dead by your mother, father and siblings until the day I die is not just a cross to bear - its a bloody great skyscraper.

  • KW13
    KW13

    I can only describe it i think, this way.

    If you stand on grass (or sit) for a short while or maybe even put something on it, the grass will usually spring up and go back to how it was.

    IF something is pressed long enough, it becomes a bigger deal.

    This isnt your fault, dont expect to recover over-night. Christian or non-Christian what the witnesses have done to everyone is repressed feelings and discouraged showing them outwardly in certain ways.

    You'll be alright.

  • freetosee
    freetosee

    In Jesus day it was the common way criminals were humiliated and executed. Jesus was killed by the Romans like many criminals (Luke 23:41). The manner in which Jesus was put to death is not alone the significances of his sacrifice.

    As raised JW I remember many memorial talks and some of them were quite emotional, also during the memorial time often emotional comments were made during the meetings. And even then I felt that I don’t share the same emotions. I couldn’t help but think, Jesus was much better off than most humans especially women and girls. He was never raped and sexually molested. And he knew for sure he will be resurrected and return to the presents of God and continue to enjoy an elevated position unimaginable "sitting at Gods right hand". The virgin girl in Judges 19:22-29 had it a lot worse than Jesus. So I could never share the emotions about the torture and death of Jesus. fts

  • Qcmbr
    Qcmbr

    Staggering - just staggering - I understand a great crime of the JWs a little more now. To compare what Jesus did to a few hours of pain and poof its all over shows just how little real understanding has been gleaned from that teaching.

    You who have suffered the pains of rejection can barely comprehend the God who was rejected by his entire people:

    O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not!

    Though you may have paid great prices in pain and suffering your empathy should be greater - not less for He that forgives and loves as only a family member can:

    Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.
    Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.

    We can only guess , for this is not something we can even share in, what He went through to atone for a world's sin:

    And he took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be sorrowful and very heavy.
    Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me.
    And he went a little further, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.

    And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.


    In His moment of agony He gave what is for me the single most awful question of all:

    What, could ye not watch with me one hour?

    And then to relive it all upon the cross until the great work was done for a selfish stuck up world such as ours and to be put to open shame by the ungrateful mob. I am amazed that we have the temerity to whinge about how our life can in any way be worse.

    (Doctrine and Covenants | Section 122:5 - 8)

    5 If thou art called to pass through tribulation; if thou art in perils among false brethren; if thou art in perils among robbers; if thou art in perils by land or by sea;
    6 If thou art accused with all manner of false accusations; if thine enemies fall upon thee; if they tear thee from the society of thy father and mother and brethren and sisters; and if with a drawn sword thine enemies tear thee from the bosom of thy wife, and of thine offspring, and thine elder son, although but six years of age, shall cling to thy garments, and shall say, My father, my father, why can't you stay with us? O, my father, what are the men going to do with you? and if then he shall be thrust from thee by the sword, and thou be dragged to prison, and thine enemies prowl around thee like wolves for the blood of the lamb;
    7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.
    8 The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than he?

    If ,as a Christian, you are unmoved by the atonement you do not yet understand it IMO.

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    geez qucmrbah, you've got it bad .. unc holds 'is breath an' steps away

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