by free2beme 35 Replies latest jw friends
LOL LOL their true colors do show. Its hard to give them time,
when we want all our love ones out NOW!!!!! What realy open my eyes is when I was to have surgery and if it went wrong I was to go
back to my unbeleiving family and they would care for me.LOL LOL
Lets see what is wrong with this picture. On one hand they are good as dead , birds will eat their flesh,unbeleivers are dead. don't talk to them.
LOL And now its OK. Which truck did I fall off of. LOL Shes gone.!!
We never know what will trigger it for someone. I think for most it's the "do more, do more" mentality that permeates the talks. I use to leave the meetings thinking, why bother, I'm not going to make it anyway. I wasn't a bad person, just felt that I would never measure up.
am I the only one who hears storieas like this and wants to go and slap an elder?
What an awesome example, thank you for articulating this so well. :)
(The witness attitude toward natural love is what sent me packing too.)
Good for your sister! Satan gets blamed for everything by JW's. Hope the kid is not called Damien!! just kidding.
The response from the elders varies from congregation to congregation. A few years back my mother-in-law moved out of the congregation. Six months later her group elder - you know, the one who is supposed to shepherd the 15 or so in his care, asks why he has not seen her in a while! SHE MOVED 6 MONTHS AGO, I told him. He was upset because she had not had her cards transfered so now he had an inactive publisher in his group and the CO was due! It never occured to him that he was a complete failure as a shepherd!
I agree with what you've said about the org and the tactics of it's members.
I grew up in dubland and left in my teens, 20 years ago, disassociated only.
Both parents are still in and will be for life. My mother has had various times where she's fallen away and has a spotty attendance record at best but is dub heart and soul. The social net and association is what brings her back, what keeps her head up, what gives her hope, despite anything i've said. She didn't have a family growing up, was abused and is an alcoholic. The org gave her the structure and rules she needed to change her life, of course to "fit in". My dad is in because of her, because of the changes it made in her life and because of me.
They joined as adults and are happy with their life and association and the purpose it gives them. They still leave pamphlets for me with key pages and passages noted and little notes about being "so close to the end", et al. I've asked them not to do this but they do it out of love, as misguided as the message is, the intent is pure. This still hits me like a emotional bolt from time to time, even to this day and i find it hard to deal with them sometimes. Over the years, I've tried so many ways to open their eyes and we've gone through much in our relationship but i am glad we have one. I feel for those here who don't, it is sad. "Don't cry for the family that wasn't, smile for the one you will have"
I don't try to change them anymore. Tonight we had dinner and they showed me some old photos from their early days and reminisced. We talked of little things, laughed at the tv and spent time. I had a moment where i almost broke down but they didn't catch it. I hugged my mother and told her i loved her. Despite all the f***** up stuff in their lives, they made a life together, better than some and they raised a good son (for the most part, lol).
Maybe one day they will see. Until then, i will love them as best i can and try to honour them as a good son should.
if you want your relatives eyes to be opened, have them take some time off
Easier said than done!
Ian
I believe it is a very good thing when someone has a break from the meetings - you stop the constant propagander entering your mind. In time the urgency and guilt trips that are constantly laid on you wear off as you're no longer reinforcing it by attending. Its funny how once you move outside of the 'ideal' that you see things that were not apparant to you before, such as extra rules above and beyond the biblical, men on power trips, double standards, politics, lack of love etc
CS 101
They still leave pamphlets for me with key pages and passages noted and little notes about being "so close to the end",
Save all of these and then 20 years from now show them to your parents and ask them why the end hasn't come yet.
I'll bet your sister will make a very good anti-witness now.
