My thoughts today

by purplesofa 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • purplesofa

    As I get myself ready to go to work today

    I was a housewife for 10 years.........and now have worked the better of 18 years........

    there is still hardly a day that goes by where I don't long to be home. I would never be bored, I could find endless things to do.

    Do men still look for wives that would be, or need a woman "full-time"? What she can bring to a home. The many talents, love, personality.

    Is that just too prehistoric? Is it always going to mean a woman has issues for wanting to live that way?


  • mouthy

    I am sure there are men out there that could love a home body. But today two pays are needed to live ....Expenses are so high that I find two are better than one ( wages)

  • freedomlover


    I have moments like this also, where some days it would be great to just stay home - but.......

    then I get to work and enjoy the change of scenery and the challenges and the people. I'm a much happier wife, mom, and woman - working. that's just me, but I did the stay at home thing when the kids were really little. There was always plenty to do at home, but I was climbing the walls from the mental funk it put me in.

    now if you could get PAID to stay home that may be a different story......

    There are for sure men who like women who want to be a housewife and not work. My experience has been they are mostly JW men who have ego issues and want the "little woman" around to "take care of him." I'm not saying they are all like that - I'm just not attracted to men who want that kind of thing. I'd rather have a guy who is secure enough that he wouldn't care if I made more money than he did...... :)

  • nicolaou

    You're not prehistoric purps. My wife is just like you, she got a job working 2 hours midday at a local school so that she can be at home longer and will always be at home during school holidays. She's a great homemaker, but she's certainly not 'the little wifey at home'.


  • ballistic

    Here's a horrible thought... in England, house prices doubled during the 60's over and above the normal expected house price increases \ inflation etc.In other words, as soon as it became the norm for women to work, property (which accounts for the biggest proportion of household expenditure) suddenly doubled. It makes you wonder if anyone is better off. Similarly nowadays, the only thing which appears to holding the upper cap on house prices is 'what people can afford' often dictated by dual incomes.

  • purplesofa

    Maybe I am just lonely today.........and have been home more than usual. I just love the peace, comfort and security of being at home. I feel what I do here is important and I feel needed here.

    I have had a career, raised kids, ......I just find that lately, i feel that I can contribute and feel fulfilled dusting baseboards and sorting socks...........

    ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh uggggggggggggggggggggggg.................I have to go.......I take care of 35 I have to get payroll delivered to 185 employees scattered in different offices in a 50 mile radius. Get important medical documents from one hospitol to Orange Juice for one center that needs it so the patients blood sugar does not drop.........and on and on and on........

    I do not want to go in today.


  • purplesofa

    My stepdad always said women going to work was the demise of America..........Mens incomes lowered so they could no longer support a family without the income of their wives. It took mothers out of the homes where they were very valueable to the family structure.

    I know from expericance working full time...........I wish I had a wife that kept the house clean, would have supper ready when I got home..........and well if "he" was dressed nice and smelled good with a huge smile and kisses when I came through the door, life would be grand.

    Instead I come home to hungry pets..........a dishwasher that needs to be unloaded..........FOX news and lovely companion......



  • LovesDubs

    Purps love, it sounds to me like you are a bit depressed today, and you feel deeply unappreciated for all that you are doing for others in your job even tho you get paid for it. Its a lot of work and at the end of the day, none of those people you worked so hard for even know who you are behind the scenes. It sounds too like you have a lot of love to give, so maybe you can change what you do to have both worlds? I dont think I could ever go back to working in an office again after working at home for the last 12 years. If you like to clean and help folks out, maybe you can start a home cleaning or "organizing" service and work whatever hours you want to? Many of the elderly love having company as well as having someone help them around the house. You would be less lonely, could help someone and get paid too.

    I think we all get to be where you are at times. Keep posting cant see us but there are a bazillion of us with you.



  • kid-A

    "Do men still look for wives that would be, or need a woman "full-time"? What she can bring to a home. The many talents, love, personality."

    I dont think this world has existed for a long time. I much prefer an equitable marriage, with both partners sharing the responsibilities of the housework and both

    having fulfilling, rewarding careers outside the home. With the advent of dishwashers, automatic dryers and washers, robotic or central vacuum cleaners, there really is'nt much

    left to do around the house anyways in terms of housework. In 20 years, I think virtually all household cleaning tasks will be fully automated.

    Kids are another story altogether, but I am happily living the "double-income no kids" lifestyle! LOL

  • purplebunnyfoofoo

    Purps, I totally agree with what your saying about enjoying being a homebody. I wonder how much of our thinking is from being JWs. I totally enjoy all the home thingys, laundry, ironing, cooking, cleaning ect.....flower garden. And its rare to find ones as ourself just because the way society is nowdays.
    I was so 'lucky' to be a stay at home mom as a JW, raised 3 kids and life was fulfilling to me. Then with divorce, and all the nightmares to follow to combine being a single mom and working was an adjustment. I would rather live simple with a husband/mate/partener at home instead of working tons of overtime to have more material things.

    Then to date 'in the world' is almost as difficult as a 'sister seeking a brother'.

    I ask the same question, where are those men who would enjoy and look forward to coming home to a real home cooked meal, met with hugs and kisses, to have not a rushed evening but to relax in his castle he provides while his queen/princess takes care of him and the possessions. Maybe I live in the fairytale of life because the reality of such desires aludes me.

    I would rather me do the house thing, he do the outside man thing, get it all done and head out for a day on the lake fishing.

    I am a school bus driver, and keep my bills paid, and if a relationship did ever appear, I would enjoy doing the driving job, just less hours. Funny, my lonliness comes alot of times in having no one to cook for.....or to fuss over at times. Or when I get the urges to head out to the lake, the boat is sitting there, and no one to go with.

    I know many speak of getting on with life.........but its hard when all you have known is the 'truth' as a way of life and you still struggle with how life was verses how life is now.

    I appreciate these xjw boards, at least we can associate among those who do understand, even if only by computer.

    Some have found 'life' within another religion, funny, I have no interest in any religion at all. Just to live a quiet life, enjoy nature, and see how the adventure unfolds. I am 47 and life is on the downside from here on out.

    I apologize for my rambling thoughts, but at times you just want someone to hold hands with. Someone to kiss and make love with....and its always harder at nighttime.


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