I feel like Im in a bad dream most of my life, fighting back the poisons that have come into my family through the Watchtower. Because I am married to a JW and his sister and her family are JWs and my DAd mother in laws 2nd husband is an Elder, its pervasive and intrusive and insidious...and I feel like Im running around stomping out fires constantly that might consume my children and take them away from me or me from them. Im exhausted from it.
My JW husband has always been an alcoholic. Always. And over the last 20 years he became more and more dependent on it and spent more and more time in bars and less with his family. I had to go find him and drive him and his vehicle home countless times passed out in parking lots, in bars, on peoples couches ...and my kids saw this. He has a flash temper that his liquid diet fuels. He never goes to meetings, never goes in service, never cracks a book or magazine. Finally last January he went to one of my sons basketball games intoxicated and had to be escorted off the floor for getting in the face of the referee...and then he went BACK to the bar AFTER the game. I went there and confronted him about not coming home to his family and embarrassing us all in public and he gave me this F-CK YOU look and turned back to his beer. He came home at 5am from that bar and beat me severely, dragging me from my bed, choking me sitting on me and slapping and backhanding my face at least 15 times while I was screaming for him to stop. He fled when I finally escaped to a neighbor and called the police and he was court ordered to stay gone for two months. But he is back now. And yes Im still here because even if I file for divorce I cant keep him out of his own house. And supposedly he has stopped drinking "indefinitely" (his word for it) But the kicker is...his mother DAd herself in December and HE is shunning HER! And now wont allow his own mother to speak to him after all the hideous heinous things he has done to me and to his children! He told my oldest that wearing a CROSS was OFFENSIVE to him! Jesus Krist! And on top of it he comes back into the house on April 1 and goes to the MEMORIAL all dressed up in his little suit with his bible and song book in hand....like NOTHING HAPPENED. And Im finding books that he is hiding in the kids ROOMS all the time. When he was gone I ripped to shreds every JW book and magazine in this house I could find. It obviously makes NO DAMN DIFFERENCE to these people their HOLY CALLINGor trainin...they can abuse every body and ANYBODY and STILL in their twisted minds have JEHOVAHS FAVOR. I sent pictures of my face that was shredded into hamburger to TWO elders who have known him since he was a teenager and nobody did a damn thing...not even a slap on the hand because he beat his apostate wife. Apparently thats ok to do, and I must have deserved it. Not a goddamn thing.
He said to me "I may have my faults but unlike YOU at least I DIDNT LEAVE JEHOVAH LIKE YOU!" . I was stunned. So obviously as long as they dont admit fault or get CAUGHT beating their wives...they get their E-ticket to Paradise no matter what and they can treat the rest of us like sh-t and theres not a damn thing anybody can or will do about it. His response to his non JW sisters and his father about what he did to me? "She bruises easily."
Anyone else have to deal with abuse like this from the CHOSEN?