how do guys ask you out on a date these days?

by Calliope 32 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Calliope
    Calliope

    ever feel like you've been sequestered from normal human interaction for too long?

    since my split (from hubby), i've been wondering what the rules are these days. in my earlier days, i was a partying stoner (well, a closet one) and i didn't date guys as much as end up in a closet or in a parked car, hot tub... okay you got the picture.

    so, i've been email bantering back and forth with this guy i used to work with and yesterday, got this email:

    If you'd like to get together for a drink some other time though,
    that sure might be fun. I'll be going to "jazz club" on tuesday to
    see a band. If you're not "jazz club-ed" out.. consider that?

    Talk to you soon,

    this was in part, a reply to an email i'd sent him a couple days earlier inviting him to the same club. to get a better picture, i did see him at a concert recently with a girl (who of course, can be his sister or cousin, nothing-more-than platonic friend, maybe mother?). so there is that possibility that he already has a girlfriend.

    so should i go to the club? should i go it alone or tag team with friends? should i be stoned? or high? stone-cold sober?

    #$)(*$#%)(*&$ - this is so strange!

    cal.

  • G Money
    G Money

    If you know him and he´s no perv, go alone to a public place and go sober so you can really get to know him without missing things from being impaired. That is assuming you want to date and soemthing more than a fling. If you just want a fling, then call me first at 011 52 998 886 xxxx. No, just do what makes you happy, after all isn´t that what really matters?

  • Robdar
    Robdar

    The dating rules are still the same. If a guy likes you, he will ask you out. If you like him, you accept.

    Go to a public place the first couple of dates. I never recommend drinking too much or smoking too much doob on a date. What's the old saying? "Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker". 'Nuff said.

    Have fun.

  • jojochan
    jojochan
    If you just want a fling, then call me first at 011 52 998 886 xxxx.

    LOLOLOLOL!!! Damn....

    jojochan.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    Firstly, I thought you girls were very good at doing your homework to find out if men are attached or not. Sometimes it's so spot on, it's almost like a sixth sense when walking into a bar. (us men are no good at it in reverse) If you've missed this step, next time ask the guy how his love life is to avoid disappointment.

    Secondly, I would go sober. If the guy is anywhere near your age, I'm sure he's no longer looking for chicks off their head or liable to throw up when things are getting romantic and intimate. hehe. . I'm sure you wouldn't want a guy turning up as a drunk \ idiot \ looser or someone with nothing serious to talk about.

  • Jim_TX
    Jim_TX

    I agree with the others... get to know the fella in a 'sober-state' first (no, not Utah), then you will be able to learn more about the individual.

    Don't accept any 'come back to my apartment to look at my etchings'... or whatever they have nowadays.

    Be friends first... if you can. Sometimes typing words in e-mails, and talking -in person- can be two different things, and can reveal a totally different person.

    Regards,

    Jim TX

  • freedomlover
    freedomlover

    Calliope -

    I really can't speak from recent experience but.......I think it depends what you want with this guy. Are you looking for another long term relationship, booty call dude, or just be friends?

    If you are serious about this guy I'd go stone-cold sober but hey if it turns out to be "friends with benefits" then I say get stoned and have a good time! :)

    BTW - I'd really like to chat with you sometime about some things.......if you want to chat PM me your email - my MAC won't let me send PM's through this website... arghhhhh

  • confusedjw
    confusedjw

    Thankfully I'm not in a position to ask ladies out on a date, but if I were I would go with the old faithful tact of throwing a frog at them and punching them in the arm to let them know I like them.

    I don't know how they do it in this century, but I do suggest meeting someone new sober so that your perceptions won't be fogged and your inhibitions lowered.

    In fact perhaps you should just meet this boy in the parlor, wearing a turtle neck, and discuss interesting things like the weather with your father in the room?

    Cheers, Hope that helped.

  • Calliope
    Calliope

    turtleneck? good suggestion.
    weather? got it!

    thanks!!!
    ;)

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu
    The dating rules are still the same. If a guy likes you, he will ask you out. If you like him, you accept.

    When did this happen? Most men today will NOT ask a woman out, because they're too intimidated by her good looks (or they find her unattractive). Women can't win in either situation. If you like someone, the best way to find out if they like you back is to ASK THEM OUT!!!!

    Also, don't show up with a bunch of your friends. That's more of a social gathering than a date. As far as him being with another girl, she might be a friend, she might be a girlfriend, she might be a relative. So what? You're only dating him. Dating is just a way of passing time until you find a good mate to be in a serious relationship with.

    Just go out, date him, and have fun. Worry about the technicalities when they pop up.

    Also, don't wear a turtleneck. If you want him to be attracted to you, wear something that makes you look sexy. I don't care what anybody says, men like it. Don't worry about looking like a slut, because guys don't give a shit about that type of labelling.

    And go there sober. A drunk woman CAN be a turn-off to a man.

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