I honestly think it's not the kids who are finding it hard with the transistion. By what I have read, it sounds like the parents have personal issues that they are putting onto their children. Yes, it is hard to let someone or something that we love behind, but don't put it onto your kids. If you truly love Jehovah and put all your fears, worries and your marital problems onto Jehovah and if you practise what the Bible says regarding marriage, everything should fall into place,,BUT if you are bringing a child/ren up on your own, just know that Jehovah provides. The end is just arpund the corner. Please, brothers and sisters, hold on to Jehovah. He will make a paradise for you and your kids.. Hold on
When you left JW, how did you help transition your kids?
by merfi 14 Replies latest jw experiences
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jgnat
How about introducing independent thinking by way of family bible study?
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merfi
'Mummy's not with us because she doesnt love Jehovah anymore
It's their dad that is no longer with us. And he claims to "love Jehovah" yet his life reflects more of a "double life"... but that's ok, I guess. As for "...she doesn't love Jehovah anymore" -- that angers me to see that. It's one of those little mean catch phrases that speak VOLUMES more to an indoctrinated dub. It is basically saying that "mommy is now wicked and will be destroyed by Jehovah." And it IS stuff like this that I need to have an answer to for the kids if they're thinking this...BUT they knew what they wanted,,"Mum and Dad. to be together.Thats how kids feel when Mum and Dad are not together.Its a devastating issue for children and more so, when kids don't understand what's happening with Mum and Dad.
I understand. Yes, I'm sure the kids would like us together. However, that is not an option. Never will be after all that he did to me. There came a point where it was a choice of staying and being emotionally and mentally abused or kicking his a$$ out and showing the kids that it was NOT all right to be treated that way, but to be strong and not controlled. They are at an age now where if they ask questions, they will know the truth about what happened. At the time of the separation, they were young and unable to comprehend.Jun 16, 2006 I honestly think it's not the kids who are finding it hard with the transistion. By what I have read, it sounds like the parents have personal issues that they are putting onto their children. Yes, it is hard to let someone or something that we love behind, but don't put it onto your kids.
They haven't verbalized any difficulty dealing with the transition, but I know it's coming. I'd rather be ready for it than not have a plan. As for my personal issues -- maybe, but I don't feel that I'm not putting them onto the kids. And I don't want the kids to have any more issues than they already do and will. I do not verbalize MY issues to them, FWIW. Everything spoken at my house is positive...If you truly love Jehovah and put all your fears, worries and your marital problems onto Jehovah and if you practise what the Bible says regarding marriage, everything should fall into place
Someone should have reminded the ex about this. It only "works" if both put it into practice... My divorce was "scriptural" if that gives any indication.Jehovah provides. The end is just arpund the corner. Please, brothers and sisters, hold on to Jehovah. He will make a paradise for you and your kids.. Hold on
I'm sorry, but I do NOT believe this. I've "leaned on Jehovah" in the past, only to be left empty... even when doing "everything right". Still never good enough for "Jehovah", never good enough for the elders. "Love among yourselves" was a joke in my old congregation; I had and have more support from my "worldly, bad association" workmates and family than I ever did with "Jah's people". I will never go back to that. I believe that I can create a better "paradise" in my family -- where there is love, respect, openness, tolerance, acceptance and a close bond that the Witnesses just can't seem to express without being legislated to do so... It's just so messed up. I appreciate your post and thoughts, though. I respect that you believe what you believe. However, I no longer believe in the JW version of parenting and am seeking advice on a replacement of sorts. (for lack of a better thought-out word :) ) merfi -
foundfreedom
My children are 20 and 11 and they are soo happy with their lives now, my daughter is marrying a yound canadian this summer that is not a JW and my son says that its so great to be a normal kid just like his so called worldly friends. I let him go to his first birthday party a few weeks ago and he had a great time. He feels so free now that he is all smiles and it makes me happy to know that I made the right decision. I have told my husband that we arnt going anymore and that our son was not going to be raised in the organization like we were only to be hurt and humiliated by so called brother and sisters.
My husband says that he doesnt want to go anymore but he does look down on me for reading what he calls apostate books and web sites. One day he will come around and finally give in and see the organization for what it is in all its glory. I dont push him and he knows not to cross me on my beliefs now, I have told him that I guess that I am an apostate and that he can accept it and stay or leave, he has chosen to stay says that he cannot live without me and the kids. Our family is much happier now and we get along sooooo much better.
Prais Jah for letting us see the light
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Tylinbrando
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