Yes, I find it very hard to admit that I was such a fool. And I never volunteer the information, the fewer people who know about it the better.
Are you embarrassed?
by desib77 50 Replies latest jw friends
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Darth Yhwh
I was embarrased as a kid growing up as a JDub but not now that I'm out. I was always afraid my schoolmates would find out and ridicule me. Now I have no problem with sharing my story or the WTBS's lies with others.
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south african beef
I got embarrassed recently when a client of mine saw me cross the road and nearly get run over.
She asked whether if I was knocked out cold and she went to the hospital with me she would be allowed to say that I could have blood.
I said that of course I would accept anything to enable me to stay alive. I then found it very hard to explain why for nearly 40 years I was so against blood transfusions.
I think that when you are a Witto you really are brainwashed, because they seem to imply that all hospitals are turning to non blood management and that they all realise how dangerous blood is. That is just not true.
I am vey embarrassed about virtually everything I learnt and did whilst I was a Witto. -
KW13
Hey, nevermind feeling embrassed. People with bad information, what they thought was right was biased/lies and twisted. Anyone searching for something better for them, their family e.t.c wouldnt stand a chance unless they knew some stuff in advance.
Your real achievement, is achieving the impossible. You LEFT! That says to me, someone very clever. Nevermind what others think, if they had of gone through the same then they'd know.
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lonelysheep
Yes, very embarrassed!!! I don't tell anyone at all. If I was raised in it, I don't think I'd care...but having began to study at 21, I feel like I should've known better. Up till then, I did.
Growing up, the witnesses were always looked at like they were full of crap, but no one had ever told me why.
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desib77
Nice to know I'm not the only one. :)
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Fleshybirdfodder
Like many others, only when I was one (I was raised a JW). Now I use it as an ice-breaker at parties.
No one who came in as an adult should feel any shame. Don't you remember at the theocratic ministry school where it was taught that we need to search out those who are going through difficulties in their lives? We heard it constantly because we were in "often worked territory." "You never know if someone has suffered a financial loss, a divorce, a death in the family, etc...." The Witlesses prey on those in dire straights. Anyone who has left, regardless of when they came in, should be proud that they had the strength to stand on their own two feet and reclaim their identity.
FBF
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katiekitten
I always tell everyone I was raised evangelical Christian.
Me too.
If I had left when I was 17 like OFG, then I might be less embarrased, but I stopped in until I was 30. I feel like some part of me choose it, and that really hurts. I cant defend it.
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daniel-p
I think the main reason many of us here are embarrased about it is because we were so deeply hurt by it all. I remember the bitter agony I felt when for the first time I thought of Paradise and how I was just fooled into believing it. I didn't ask for a cult, no one here did. I was born and rasied into it by a mentally unstable mother, learning to equate my self-worth with how much I was "serving" Jehovah. The word I try desperately to keep out of my head is "waste, waste, waste..." such a waste of my precious life. But I know I shouldn't feel too bad. There are many here who spent a much bigger part of their life in the bOrg.
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katiekitten
learning to equate my self-worth with how much I was "serving" Jehovah.
I cant express how much I agree with that statement.
hurts
hurts
hurts