Are most JW`s deeply unhappy?

by jambon1 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • jambon1
    jambon1

    Its not until you are out of the religion that you notice how unhappy a lot of witnesses are. Through family I still have contact with quite a few and hear of stories of whats going on.

    I am like a different person now I am out. Of course, JW`s would love nothing more than for you to be deeply depressed but I think when they see me in the street or hear about me, they are perplexed as to how I can possibly be so happy. Its not what they expect.

    Meanwhile, you hear about more and more family break ups, ill health, and just general negativity from inside the org. I am taliking about the brothers/sisters who are telling these tales. I heard of one pioneer who said he wanted `out of the truth`!!

    I can see it written over the face of family members on meeting nights/mornings - they are so tired and worn out, and simply would rather give the meeting a miss but they are stuck in this dilema about 'never missing a meeting'. The same goes for field service mornings - what a stress to control 2 kids, speak to people who dont want to be spoken to & do all of this when you are physically exhausted.

    I drank heavily when I was a JW because I couldnt cope with the 'nothing is ever good enough' mentality. I was mentally, emotionally & physically wrecked trying to keep up. Add to this, serious doubts about various doctrines and I nearly had a breakdown.

    But is this just regional to my area? Do you think there are lots of witnesses who are facing the same battles? Im not so sure, some congs seem very lively.

    Anyone concur?

  • lovelylil
    lovelylil

    Jambon,

    Thanks for sharing your story. I agree with you that many JWs are unhappy and depressed. They use antidepressents and alchohol to mask their unhappiness. At least this is from what I personally saw in the two halls I was in.

    Also the talk was always negative about bad health, kids who don't listen, hubbys that are never around, not feeling like they are doing enough for Jehovah, etc..and this can rub off on others. I used to tell the "friends" when I was out in service with my kids that I wanted them to refrain from the negative talk because my kids felt like Jehovah's people were all negative and unhappy people so why would they want to become one? (out of the mouths of babes)

    Since coming out my whole family is much more happy and I am off anti-depressents that I had to take the whole 12 years I was in the org.

    All legalistic religions have this same affect on the people in it. They stress constant works over God's grace and you never, no matter how much you do, feel like you can do enough.

    Since leaving, I see these people in stores all the time and they look even more unhappy to me now. My kids saw one elders wife recently in a walmart. I did not see her but my daughter who is 13 commented that this lady looked so unhappy and depressed. And that she looked so old too. She is my age, 37. stress and sadness ages you prematurely.

    I am also so happy to be out of the org. And I am a completely different person too. Thanks again for sharing, Lilly

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    I think quite a few of them are, I know I was during my last years in the org. Of course, we were taught that once someone has left the org, they will never be truly happy again, yet most of the ones I have met since leaving seem far more content than they ever were as jws.

  • Why Georgia
    Why Georgia

    My husband and I were talking about this yesterday. He was telling me that when he was younger, everyone was happy and had zeal. Lots of parties and get togethers.

    Now everyone we know who is a Jehovahs Witness is depressed and just grumpy. Nobody is happy. And if you are happy, they don't want to be around you because they are jealous or discouraged by your unattainable happiness.

    Where are Jehovahs Happy People?

    Best Regards,

    Chrystal

  • unique1
    unique1

    I think a lot of them are unhappy. I know an entire family of 7 and all but 2 are on antidepressants. Several put on a happy face when at the meetings and in field service, but then they go home to their family and the smile goes away. I think a lot of them are just faking happiness.

  • jstalin
    jstalin

    My JW friend drinks a lot and seems generally unhappy. We don't get into deep conversations much, but he does mention that he generally feels poorly each morning because he drank too much the night before.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Actually, JWs don't expect to be happy in this wicked system. Most of them are hanging on until the new system...lots of antidepressants and alcohol. I was stunned at the number of elders and elders wives on medication.

    Blondie

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    I don't know about what goes on today because I left the dubs 20 years ago but back then the dubs weren't particularly unhappy or happy they just looked like plastic people, but then again that congo wasn't very fanatical in the jw ways they didn't really take the org taht seriously.

    Nowadays perhaps the JWs lost their sense of purpose because the new system was postponed indefinitely in 1995 and that coming paradise was their major hope.

    Otherwise the WTS system is too works oriented and stressful, it's a hard daily struggle to survive the coming judgement.

  • metatron
    metatron

    Depression , as diagnosed officially or not, is an epidemic in this organization. Good evidence comes from the Awake magazine

    in years past, which used to publish many articles on depression - but stopped as the matter became an embarassment to the organization.

    Don't count on ReichFuhrer Jaracz to allow this subject to gain new emphasis.

    metatron

  • Country Girl
    Country Girl

    You are only happy because you are partaking of the Devil's feast -- that which gratifies you and delivers every desire. You are giving in to your most base desires, whatever they may be, so because you have pleasure and joy in your life, it must be the Devil's doing since we all *know* that doing God's will only brings suffering and persecution, and you surely would not be enjoying it if you were doing God's work. Doing God's work, which *should* bring you persecution, is the only way to peace of mind, since when you are doing GOD'S work, and NOT the Devil's, you should have confirmation that you are on the straight and narrow, and only means what the persecution confirms of you: that you are doing God's work. If you have peace of mind without persecution, you must be out of your mind.

    CG

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