I would like your opinion

by Soledad 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    What does it mean when an adult is terrified of being alone? When I say being alone I mean living alone, not want to eat alone, sleep alone, or even go to the bathroom alone. Why would that person be so fearful of loneliness?

  • AuldSoul
    AuldSoul

    Abandonment is often at the root, either actual or fear of it. Sometimes our measure of self-worth can become attached to our perception of how attached people want to be to us. I am sure there are other causative factors, maybe Lady Lee will breeze through and post.

    Respectfully,
    AuldSoul

  • looking_glass
    looking_glass

    Is this your fear? If so, can you be a little more specific?

    There are some people in the world who do not like being alone because they feel isolated and it frightens them. They need constant companions. It gives them energy and recharges them. However, others are the opposite. To be around people all the time, tires them out and they need to be alone to recharge. Myers Briggs (sp?) has a presonality test that breaks the various personalities down and describes their needs/weakness/strengths.

  • cyrus
    cyrus

    I think loneliness can be terrifying .We are social creatures god recognised this at the time of adam .remember he said it is not good for man to be alone and then he gave eve we are at our best when around others ,well i am .you know i fear nothing accept being alone .solitary confinement is the worst punishment that can be given to prisoners what does that tell you? by the way hi everyone

  • Lo-ru-hamah
    Lo-ru-hamah

    http://www.mental-health-matters.com/articles/article.php?artID=825

    This article touches on it. It seems that a person with this fear needs to build their self confidence. It is called autophobia.

    Don't know anything else about it but thought this address might get a start.

    Loruhamah

  • blondie
    blondie

    Alone time is precious for me; I was always happy with my own company, reading, tv, writing, listening to music, baking cookies. I love being in the bathroom alone too, prefer it...I have to adjust to sharing stalls at work. I like to draw, play a musical instrument, practice my languages.

    When you eat, set a nice table, flowers, crystal, china, silver. Sit and take time to eat and savor. I used to put on a tape to practice my Spanish. Nice music is good.

    After growing up in an abusive household, I longed for the safe, quiet time when my father was not home.

    Add in some time with people. I used to:

    Go to the same restaurant at the same time with the same server...got to know them.

    Go to the hairdresser.

    Visit the library.

    Conversely, I can be in a large group of people and imagine myself alone...helped me endure the meetings and conventions.

  • BizzyBee
    BizzyBee

    I agree with Blondie - I love alone-time. Mr. Bee is gone playing golf ALOT!

    But I do not feel the golf widow thing - We both love it when he comes home, but until then, those alone hours for me are precious.........however, if no one is coming home at then end of the day or few days...........we are talking REALLY ALONE.

    Depending on your sitch - age, prospects, etc. - it can be a totally different deal. You may have to ask yourself what your real issues are--and this can be a valuable time in your life to gain greater knowledge of yourself.

  • Carmel
    Carmel

    aaww, now that answers my long held query as to why some people used to build two-holer out houses!

    carmel

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    Interesting blondie thankyou. I can relate to all you've said.

    Our upbringing affects us for the rest of our lives. I was raised in a big family and got in the habit of rushing through life like a mad billygoat with too much to do and the music up loud. A few years in the forest helped mellow me and gave me an appreciation of quiet time (not that silence is common or a man is ever alone in an Australian forest). Socialising is fun but time alone is precious. Hours in the shed bringing antiques back to life or making things of iron and wood is wonderful as is getting lost in a good book or fishing or sleeping at the beach.

    unclebruce who will be kayaking along the coast tommorrow while the sea is calm.

    :::

    Hey carmel .. pass the watchtower..

    alt

  • penny2
    penny2

    Hi soledad

    Preferring the company of others is one thing, but being terrified of being alone would be a problem. Perhaps the person has suffered a panic attack while alone. They may subconsciously fear having another panic attack if left alone again. People who suffer panic/anxiety disorder often fear the circumstances or place they were in when they had their first panic attack.

    Just a thought!

    penny2

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