TR,
I am also grateful to Ray Franz and internet forums such as this one. When I saw through the deception that starts with the GB my life began.
As someone who was taught to be devout from infancy, the teachings of the Borg were in every fiber of my being. They shaped every thought I had and every perception of myself and others. Every school class, every book I read, every news article I read, every conversation I had with anyone on any subject, every challenge I faced in my life, all were perceived through a carefully constructed, altered state of reality which prevented me from attempting to understand their true nature and effect upon me. This induced a denial about the very nature of my existence and the world that is more pervasive than any other that I can imagine.
As I stated in another thead recently, all the activities (in proper balance) are not bad for one, and I learned many good habits of personal development as a result of taking my faith and responsibilities seriously. These are things, however, that may be learned equally well outside of the context of God and religion, given proper training and direction -- and learned without the denial and mistrust of others, and without the cultlike isolation physically, mentally and emotionally, that can induce many types of personality dysfunctions among JWs.
It took over a year for me to completely divorce my mental indoctrinations. It took countless hours of studying everything I had been taught and re-evaluating them and how they had affected me. I would still be in that process if I had not had access to the thorough, well-researched books by Ray Franz. I went through many painful evenings, and yet I knew that this was a very important process, if I was to regain my life and my find my true identity. Of course, that was only a start, but it sure feels good to finally start.
I also grieve for those who are still deceived, many of whom I love and care about personally. I must remember that they will find out when they need to and, in many cases, when they will permit themselves to question beliefs that will shatter the very foundation upon which they have built their lives, and how they relate to themselves and the world and to God.
