Well, a couple of weeks ago, I get a message on my answering machine - out of the blue - from my older sister.
She tells me that another sister (also older than me) was admitted to the hospital for 'tests'. It seems that she had been having pain over the last 6 or so months - and it finally got so bad that she allowed herself to be put in the hospital.
Initial diagnosis was cancer. Doctors were running more 'tests' to see how bad.
Well... I went to visit her in the hospital, and bought her a stuffed animal - a tiger. Nice and soft it was. (I'm not too good at figuring the best things to buy someone in a hospital - much less my older sis.) She was still able to talk, and accepted the stuffed tiger - put it next to her in the bed.
We chatted for abit that night... then I went home. It appeared to me that she had waited too long for treatment. The hospital had her on a 'drip' that was cutting the pain a bit, but she was still in pain.
Last Saturday, I got more messages on my machine. I called my brother, who told me that she had been moved to another facility - a hospice - and that she only had days - or hours - to live.
My girlfriend and I - again - went to visit. This time - she was lying in a bed - and sorta staring out - not recognizing anyone - and struggling to take each breath.
My older sister, and two younger brothers were there... and pleasantries were exchanged. (They are all JWs - I am not... although they do not ask - I do not tell.)
Anyway... everyone stood around... not sure what to do or say.
I went over and rubbed my sister's hand as she lay in the bed... myself, not sure what to say. (Things like 'get better' or 'hope you're felling well' just didn't seem right)
As the minutes turned into an hour or so... one brother needed to leave to go home to his wife, and so mumbled a goodbye to my sister who lay in bed, taking each breath with a gasp.
A few minutes later, I went over to her - rubbed her hand lightly - and told her that I needed to be leaving and for her to "...not worry about things. Everything would be okay."
I then went out into the hall to tell my other sister and brother goodbye.
After a few minutes, the attending nurse came outside and told us that it appeared that my sister had a few minutes left.
We all went into the room, and my older sister stood by her bed, not saying much. I reached over and rubbed her hand... as the nurse tried to get a pulse. She left - and returned with a stethoscope, and placed it against my sisters' chest, trying to get a heartbeat. After a few seconds - which seemed a long time, she looked at my older sister and slowly shok her head.
Why am I relating this?
I dunno. I've never been in the same room as someone passed. My three siblings - now two - that still live 'at home', are still solo - not married... not dating... and no intentions of doing so. They subscribed to the fairy-tale long ago of an Armageddon... where afterwards, our father and another sister (big family)- who was killed in a car wreck - would be resurrected, and all coud 'live happily ever after'. They were holding on to a fairy-tale of our father 'walking them down the aisle' at their wedding. *sadly shakes head*
I look at my two siblings... my older sister... who looks far older than her years... my younger brother - who also looks older than he is (my girlfriend commented to me that if all three of us stood next to each other, she would pick me as the youngest. I'm 4 years older than the middle brother - and 5 older to the youngest)
Anyway... I think my older sister is slowly beginning to realize that they are all going to die off... spinsters - with no big 'A' coming anytime soon - or at least in their life times. She was really looking sad and worried.
Me? I'm doing great. I left home when I was 21 - and was ostracised because of that. They pretty much shunned me for that action. (At the time, I was still a JW, too.)
My other brother - he left about 10 years later... and got married. My mom was pi**ed. I heard her state that she 'wanted to pick the one he married'. *rolls eyes*
Anyway... another sister passed. That's pretty much all this is going on about. The funeral will be sometime later this week.
That'll be another 'experience' for me. A JW funeral. If it's like the last one - my mom's - they'll pontificate long and hard for 30 minutes about something (I don't really listen - I never did - even as a JW), and they'll reconvene at the graveside, where he'll do a 30-minute repeat of what he said at the funeral home.
Regards,
Jim TX