Yep, you heard me correctly. In the Spring and Fall of every year at our community fire hall there are three meals held to support and help out the fire company, ambulance, and one for the Lion's Club. Now, every good JW knows not to support worldly organizations, right? Apparently grumbling stomachs over-rule organizational policy. My family has always attended all three, even when I was a little co-pilot back in the day. You have the option of eating in (all you can eat), or simply buying a "Take-out". Well, while my JW mother, myself, and my family were waiting to be seated, who do you think we saw standing in line for a "take-out?" Why, a JW Elder! Not just any elder, but a guy I've known my whole life. He saw us from across the fire hall, but didn't waive or say anything. I couldn't believe it! Why was I being ignored? I'm an unbaptized non-publisher who shows up 3 times a year for a meeting, which means I'm still in good standing.....no reason to be shy! So after a while of being snubbed, I simply walked across to greet him! Of course then he put on happy face and we chatted a bit, and I am actually the one whom brought up the Memorial, as to which night it was, etc. He didn't even invite me, I had to invite myself! Also, while speaking to him, he kind of looked past me, out towards the crowd. I found this quite rude and ackward. WTF? He really just looked like a tired old man, and even stated he wished he were retired, he had grandkids, etc. Also, a woman I didn't even know came up to me to thank my mother and I for a gift basket my mother had sent her elderly and ill mother. I was totally floored. She came over to my mother then and spoke some more. Here, I had to walk over to an Elder, a SHEPHARD of the flock to make small talk, but a "Worldly" woman came up to thank me for my mother's gift. The irony was so thick you could have cut it with a knife.
This brings me to my next issue, which has been bubbling to the surface of my psychy for the past few years. Now that I have my own son (now 2), what am I to do with him? Do I take him to the Memorial? Indoctrinate him into the JW belief system only, but not overburden him with the organizational BS? But that doesn't seem right. So far we have celebrated B-Days with him, that is it. Last year, I took my non-JW wife to the Memorial to only have her be confused and unimpressed. I was also unimpressed. The "Hall" was only half full, not overflowing with folding chairs in the back as it was when I was a child. As an adult, I have learned to step back and just watch people and events. What I saw at the last 3 meetings I was at was this: low meeting attendance (especially at Memorial), lack of emotion, depressed and tired looking faces, old faces, lack of people aged 19-35, mono-tone singing, and on and on. A total lack of joy. When I was a child, there was actual JOY in the Kingdom Hall I attended, and it showed. It was common to have get-togethers, congregational picnics, supper with friends, etc. In the mid-80's that all changed, and it seems that everything went downhill from there. Also, there was real SINGING, with a woman playing a piano at the front of the hall with actual feeling. Now it's just canned non-enthusiastic droning. Jesus said that you would know his disciplies by their love and works towards one another, and I see next to ZERO of that. Who takes care of the elderly? What do they give to the community besides magazines? I find it amazing that my worldy Lutheran in-laws have so many activities for their children at their church, picnics, camps, choir, even a community center but the JW's have absolutely nothing to help their congregations. You give the society and Bethel everything, and you get magazines to peddle in return and are supposed to keep track of your time and quit working to pioneer full-time? What BS!!
This brings me to another thought I've had the last few years.....why the removal of literature from the mail? Why not post EVERY magazine and society publication right onto the WatchTower website for EVERYONE on the ENTIRE earth with a computer to be able to download immediately? Think of the cost savings, the speed at which the news would reach everyone? But then I thought about it......if they did that, they couldn't have every publisher out there peddling magazines and they'd have free time to actually think about how much time they've wasted doing nothing in life. They sure wouldn't want that!
So these are some of my random experiences and thoughts recently. Maybe some of you can relate, and any help you think you might be able to give me would be appreciated. This year I've been thinking about attending a "worldly" Easter service, maybe with Seventh Day Adventists, or Lutherans perhaps. Just to see something different. I know the Memorial talk by heart now, and I never get invited anywhere anyway (not good enough), so why even bother with the JW's this year?
Thanks for listening,
Wing Commander