It depressed me...
While reading this article I could'nt help BUT to feel my self worth plummet. It made me realize one thing about their organization. What your place is among them. As a slave; a slave to their dogma in thinking that the only reason that things are the way that they are IS in fact so that all can convert into witnesses since he does'nt want all to be destroyed.And to prove to the debil his prowess.
Somehow that answer does'nt quite satisfy me right now, at least not like it used to.
Even when I was still going I thought that their reasoning was suspect in the sense that their truth changes every so often.We all noticed how they would "slip" it by the collective every once and a while. We have evedince of this.(blood issue, men of sodom,disfellowshipping, smurfs, ect) But this article, this article was them in it's rarest form. Which bothered me. And with others like my family that would try to pour upon me words of encouragement did'nt mention to me anything about this article. I guess it depressed them as well, but alas the sun is still in their eyes but deep down they know and somehow hate realizing that they are nothing more than a slave to the society, an ant in their god's antfarm, which was and still from time to time how I feel as well. And reading that poison; that pure example of curcular reasoning almost drove me to the point of self hate and mutilation. To feel less than zero, to feel like you have NO identity in the society's eyes,makes you feel small, minute....a cog in a big monstrosity that seperates, confuses and depresses those that are in the dark. That are sighing and groaning over how f'ed up the world is. But it's ok...just run to that hall, run to those doors on that beautful saturday morning to wake people up to hear the dogma, run to those meetings where you will hear the same thing everyday but worded differently. Sit there and try to swallow down the explaination of "patience".
I could'nt swallow...I had to spit.
I'm done, hand me the pen and paper.