JW couples don't love each other

by Nosferatu 35 Replies latest jw friends

  • stillajwexelder

    utter bullshit - well at least in our KH

  • Kristofer

    i noticed this a lot in my previous relationship. There was a serious lack of affection. Of course I know some of it was due to a guilty conscience...me being a wordly pagan apostate!

  • blondie

    Actually, in many areas married couples are told not to be too affectionate, holding hands, kiss on the cheek, at the KH; they are told it makes the single sisters sad. I can remember a visiting elder's wife put her arm around her hubbie at the WT study and was "reprimanded" by the local elders. Her husband told them not to schedule him to visit that KH again.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Actually it seems to me to be a matter of the right place and time. I doubt you would find a lot of cooing in the pews of any church at their services. Mature people don't have to 'display' in the public forum to be in love, do they?


  • cyd0099

    Just like anywhere there are couples whose relationships have gone stale or they have grown apart. The biggest problem in the congregations is these people have limited options* and pressure from the elders not to make descions that could possibly stumble their brothers.

    *scriptural divorce-somebody gets DF'd
    unscriptural divorce-nobody gets to move on with their life**
    separation-leads to speculation and gossip in the congo/circut/district/ and so on
    Stay together vI.0-it pleases everybody(congo / elders / god) except the couple, thereby creating unhappiness and resentment in the relationship, i.e. the original post.
    stay together v1.5- it works out (much more rare, in fact, I've never seen it happen)

    **Okay,somebody finally gets tired of celebacy and a lack of intimacy and moves on. DF'ing ensues and if it all works out they join us on the board.

    Cyd, of the "divorced while a dub" class

  • The Lone Ranger
    The Lone Ranger

    I have noticed that there is a measure of coldness between couples, but then they reassure others how happy they are, particulalry elders wives. How can they really be happy, their hubbies are never home, they have to go to elders meetings, etc... they do everything by arrangement nothing is spontaneous, maybe even their sexlife. They must allways be out witnessing, on the weekends too, do a family study, personal study, and go to all the meetings.. thats enought to kill anyones' emotions. And then are they expected to feel lucky because they have such a wonderful and spiriual husbands! No wonder so many just give up leave a note on the table and run off with someone else.

  • greendawn

    I think it was generally the oppressive nature of the cult that makes everything the JWs do look incompetent. They lose too much dignity to the org and as I remember most of them lacked depth and felt like robots.

  • JH

    I think this is true in couples of all religion. The flame gets smaller with time.

  • LDH
    When they asked her if she regretted not getting married for the purpose of pioneering she broke down in tears. You could tell she really just wanted to have a man in her life but as many will tell you if you don’t get married young in the truth you won’t find a decent mate anywhere, only weirdos and freaks. She tried to explain away her reaction but everyone saw through it. I still feel bad for that poor sister.

    That sucks hard.

    Not because she's single like a lot of people her age, but because she still couldn't admit to herself that selling magazines is not a substitute for good sex with the person you love. She'll be df'd soon, because some asshole will sense this and know how to play her like a cheap fiddle.

  • Chimene
    Cyd, of the "divorced while a dub" class

    That would be me to. Only, I wasn't baptized. This was their excuse also to not help me when I asked for spirital help with my marraige. However, I met someone AFTER I left him, so now, they shun me as if I was baptized. How hypocritical is that?

    He turned into a robot immediately after saying "i do" completely different person from who I dated.

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