Ok, so how big of a deal is it when a jw tells you this:

by Check_Your_Premises 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • calico
    The reality is my wife's problem is not that she is a jw. Her problem is that she is psychologically unbalanced... she has unresolved issues and experiences. She has experiences that she has not put in proper perspective. She has experiences that she has not rationalized. She has behavior resulting from those experiences that she has not recognized and understood, and therefore cannot control.

    Excellent statement--sounds just like members of my family.

  • anewme

    CYP, it is a big deal when a witness says this! They are tired of the fight-----the fight between what they are hearing and how they feel and believe inside!

    It is a hard thing to let go of, but in the interest of sanity and happiness, something has got to give!

    Your wife's life is out of control. Out of her control.

    She definitely needs a break and vacation and to get away from the meetings for awhile.

    She needs nature and your love and to laugh and feel free and her old happy self.

    Suggest a get away or one later in the Spring or Summer to look forward to.

    Talk about how nature makes one feel so close to God.

    Who is born and looks forward to becoming a life long advertiser for a publishing company?

    At some point many would like to retire.

  • outoftheorg

    One thing you might consider is the probability that your wife may be experiencing what is called cognative dissonance a form of mental confusion that occurs when one is told beliefs of certainty, that are in conflict with daily real life experiences.

    Your wife since she was not raised as a jw is really gifted, in that whe has a former active personality that the wbts wants cancelled while they give you a new and different personality .

    It may help if you can slowly engage her in some of these previous feel good activities that the original personality enjoyed.

    I feel really good about your wifes expressions, since I can see her coming home to her legitimate original personality.


  • sass_my_frass
    She assured me she still believes it is the truth. She just isn't happy.

    I was completely convinced of it, and not believing it at the same time, and therefore very unhappy. It's not easy being a female cult member!

    I like what you said about her doing 'the right thing'.

  • sass_my_frass

    If you go with the vacation idea, check first that it's not going to coincide with any 'important' events like memorial, assembly... don't put her in the position of choosing too often - she might like the feeling of being a martyr. 'It must be right, because it's hard'.

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