by Billygoat 27 Replies latest members private
What do you do to scratch below someone's surface?
Pay attention. Where people look when they talk, voice inflection, what and how they talk about, body language (wrapping your hand around your thumb is a sign of insecurity for example), how tense or relaxed they are and so on and on.
People will always show you who they really are. You just have to pay attention if you really want to know.
I wouldn't want people to know me as well as I know myself. I am happy for them to accept the appearance I choose to give.
Privacy is a great privilege, which is why we don't live in communal homes but live alone or with a partner who we trust enough to reveal more too. Do our partners really know us or our secret thoughts?
As Sinatra sang,'The deepest wounds we hide inside ourselves were they never show.'
I have to wonder what scholar and Ianone/Rigboy are like IRL....
Is it then MY fault that people get the impression of a perfect girl when that is the front I put up?
(((((Andi))))
You gotta get through the day somehow, you know?
In my job I have to talk for literally 9 hours per day, whether it's in face or person to person, and when I come home I'm just ready to hear SILENCE!!!!!! But I do what I have to do to get through the day.
I don't think you're so different from the people you see and meet every day.
At my last job, there was a girl there my age who was just aching for everyone's approval. Everyone in the joint knew her personal business. In the process they lost a lot of respect for her, and she became the victim of brutal non-stop office gossip. She's looking to go to a new job, and I gave her some advice. KEEP YOUR PERSONAL SHIT TO YOURSELF. It doesn't do any good to spread it around the environment you have to be in for 9 hours a day.
I think what you are seeing is that mature people like yourself are trying not to 'burden' others with your troubles. This can be good, as long as you have someone, i.e., hubby, to share your troubles with.
No one likes to hang out with milque-toast, know what I mean?
You are just fine like you are.
Love,
Lisa
But they have no idea who I am, what I believe in, what I represent, what impassions me, or what issues I struggle with on a daily basis.
I actually consider these to be matters which should be concealed from the general public. My experience with the WTS and its tendency to snoop into one personal life, and then use this information to control and punish, instilled in me an over developed sense of privacy.
I enjoy the idea that people DON"T know such things about me.
We all try to keep "the front porch swept" so to speak to appear to be decent folk.
That just makes sense.
But if you have lived a while you know that everyone struggles with just about the same things.
Inner drive may vary. And that can change due to time and circumstance.
I see in the life stories of individuals that hope in the form of the love from another human or an extraordinary experience can change the direction of a life to out perform the rest of us.
Just the opposite, awful experiences with significant guardians and health and circumstance setbacks and the untimely death of a loved one, can break a spirit and catapult the human heart into the depths of despairing cynical mentality.
We are all a combination of all these factors. Thank God some human being has shown us kindness and cared for us while we were helpless and growing. And now though grown, we still owe thanks to those around us who are caring for our hearts...friends, lovers, family.
Everyone's life is a story, usually interesting if you enjoy stories of courage, perseverence, sadness, weakness, struggle, triumph, and grace.
You should write Billy Goat. I have read your posts and you are a very gifted girl. Then everyone will know the real you.
i think most people don't know themselves but they live successful lives as other people, or aspire to be other people. they never question anything and everyone around them is so happy that the image remains intact.
o, i think i just described my congregation.
apart from these types of people, there are those that are ever-changing and that are trying to figure themselves out, that are trying to explain things, defining the "bigger picture" and how they fit within it. they don't know themselves very well either... but they don't try to hide it.
billy,
I put up a really great front.
How many of us do this?
not any more. it's even painful so much of the time. but i don't do that anymore. so tired of that mentality. but ya, it's true what others say. don't worry about what others think of you regardless.
What do you do to scratch below someone's surface?
it's easy. you observe them for a while, and then just go in for the kill and plunge the estoque into their mind with questions about the meaning of existence. and if they have easy fast answers, you just keep asking "why?" until they start crying. and then you go on a road trip, and stay in cheap motels and do lots of drugs. and basically, that is how you get under someones surface.
he he
ts
i am pretty out there. i mean what you see is what you get. y'all can tell this from my posts. i know who i am. i have a hard time presenting it accurately to others. certain parts get exaggerated. like people see my weird side but don't seem to notice when i'm being serious. its frustrating.
:: you observe them for a while, and then just go in for the kill and plunge the estoque into their mind with questions about the meaning of existence. and if they have easy fast answers, you just keep asking "why?" until they start crying. and then you go on a road trip, and stay in cheap motels and do lots of drugs. and basically, that is how you get under someones surface.
OMG LOL!!!!!!!!
