Advice anyone? On how men think and faithfulness. (page 2)

Thegoodgirl

Gabriella,

Reading between the lines (well,okay, it was obvious) you do want out of your marriage. The other posters are right. You have to decide to be faithful to your husband, or to leave him.

Of course the other guy is a player. But at the same time, maybe he is thinking two things:

1. there's no chance with this Gabriella, she's too faithful to her hubby AND

2, I'm a terrble person to have kissed my friend's wife, I can't face him again, I feel like a jerk.

So he doesn't hang out with you guys. Do you actually think you can ever have a normal relationship with him agaiin? no.

And as to the kiss on the cheek vs the lips, honey, he was just flirting. Had you given the green light, he would have kissed on the lips.

Maybe you read too much into it. I have several male friends who kiss me on the lips in greeting, we are quite close, but we will never be sexually involved. It sounds to me like you are seeking connection, which I find is common with many ex witnesses having been disconnected so long. You are perhaps misinterpreting this desire for connection to wanting a better partner.

See if you can connect more with your partner.See if you can make connections with others without sex involved.

AuldSoul

It is simple:

(1) If you are in a committed long-term relationship and your partner isn't okay with you having trysts, you are going to ruin what you actually have in exchange for what you might have.

(2) If you are in a committed long-term relationship and your partner IS okay with you having trysts, you still RISK ruining what you actually have for what you might have.

(3) If you aren't in a committed long-term relationship and your partner isn't okay with you having trysts, they risk ruining what they have for what they might have.

Hope that helps. By the by, I expect you are used to getting what you want in life. It seems that way from your post. That's what this man thinks.

Respectfully,
AuldSoul

Gerard

He has nothing to loose. But w hat is your marrige worth to you??

JamesThomas

Gabriella, you don't need advise about men. You need to get clear on what is going on with you.

j

daniel-p

"Is it possible to stay friends with a girl that you had hit on? "

No. His ego is wounded. He sounds like sleaze to me....

AK - Jeff

Be careful. Your words reveal your heart. You miss him.

If you want to keep your marriage intact - keep away. Seriously. I think you know this.

Jeff

Apostanator

Had the same situation happen to me. My wife and I were best friends with this couple for years. They were going through a rough time and eventually got divorced. Well, I always suspected that my wife and my friend had some sort of attraction for each other. One friday I came home from work and my wife was nowhere to be found. Now I'm wondering, what's going on here. I call my friend.......no answer. Bottom line, they took off together for a weekend. You've got to be carefull, you could be playing a dangerous game. Oh,,the wife? I got rid of her. And my friend? He came sooo close to being the target of a blanket party. That was 11 years ago. It all worked out in the end for me. I am now married to a beautiful woman and soul mate.

gabriella

Thank you for the posts everyone. I think you all gave me some really good advice,, even those of you who let me have it. I'm just glad that I didn't cheat and I still have the opportunity to work on my marriage. I talked to my husband and he kind of knew what was going on and he said that he was just worried about loosing me. What a sweetheart. I don't deserve him, but I'm going to try.

Advice anyone? On how men think and faithfulness.