Do you have a "Confidante"?

by JH 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • Jamelle

    I can talk with my husband about almost anything. He will listen when I talk about Dub stuff or emotions I still deal with as a result of it. He is sympathetic and supportive.

    But as bad as this may sound, I feel like its very difficult for someone that didn't live through the Witness "experience" to truly comprehend the scope of it. (Not impossible, mind you, just difficult) Thus, when it comes to matters about the JWs I have one true confidante. My oldest and dearest friend - she left the dubs about the same time I did.

    We supported each other, reminded each other of why we were leaving, cried and laughed our way through the years of craziness. We are still very close, although we don't feel the need for long talks about the JWs as we used to. I think this is a sign that we are healing. We were both very lucky that we had the other's support when it was most needed.

  • AlmostAtheist

    Wow, what a great topic! I have to admit, I expected to come on here and everyone would be talking about their great highschool buddy or their brother, and I would say, "Nope, there's nobody I can really open up to. Poor me."

    As it turns out, the majority of you are in the "poor me" category! Poor us!

    I talk to myself alot. I guess I'm my own confidante. I spent a few weeks not talking to me (I had a falling out with myself) but we're on speaking terms again.

    Seriously though, how CAN a person acquire a confidante? "Friends" are pretty easy to come up with, but how do you find the friend that you can really trust?


  • JH
    Friends" are pretty easy to come up with, but how do you find the friend that you can really trust?

    There is a difference between a friend, a best friend, and just an everyday aquaintance.

    Usually your best friend should be the one you can come up to and open up and the true friend will listen.......

  • Ellie

    I didn't, I used to bottle everything up until I exploded but then I joined this board and met someone who is so easy to talk to and understanding, the fact we havn't met in real life probably helps too and the way he understands my history unlike my friends and partner, so I tell him everything and he still sticks around, I'm very grateful to him.

  • LittleToe

    Several, both male and female. The common denominator is that I choose them carefully and they are trustworthy.

    There are large areas of my life that I rarely reveal here. Further, if I don't want to tell someone something I just don't, and won't be drawn on the subject. I don't know how many people have asked my my age, for example, and it's something that I simply don't want to reveal. It started as a means of reducing pigeonholing, and turned into quite a game

  • Satanus

    Square peg no go in round hole.

    S stubbornly trying to pidgeonhole lt

  • Gretchen956

    Yes, two. My partner is one and my life-long best friend is the other.

    I know how old Ross is, he's 4, says so right under his picture!!


  • JH

    Well, in a way I do have a few confidants

    First my mother. Usaully I'll keep things that worry me to myself until I can't bear them anymoe then I'll reveal things to her.

    2nd, I have a very good chat friend that I say alot to and that I appreciate so much

  • tijkmo


    how sad is that

  • serendipity

    I have a friend at work that I complain about my Mom to, because she also has problems with her mother. I do a lot of venting on the three forums I hang out on. My mother is my main dumping grounds about work-related complaints. I don't want any one person to have a 360 degree view of me.

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