when i was a wit, i was into it too. one time i sand papered my right cheek, and told people at the hall that i had been mugged. but you know, i still cut myself. it doesn't mean you want to really harm yourself, it just means you want to escape for a bit. the pain comes back worse than before, but like any addiction, you keep doing it because the relief is, for a few moments, beautiful.
i am trying to get out of it, and the Awake actually has some good things to say about the sitch. but really, they have no f-ing clue what in the sam-hell they are talking about. i find that writing, or painting or playing the guitar helps me avoid it, on good days. it gives me a release that i can be proud of, instead of ashamed of. but on the bad days, ya, i still cut myself. i am not defending it. just explaining it.
technically, if there were such a thing as a spiritual paradise, witnoids would not be cutting themselves. but since no such place exists, it makes sense that there are a whole spectrum of cutters, including witnesses.
depressed apes. who would expect different?
TS
