perspective on growing up in a jw family after i had my son

by limbogirl 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • limbogirl

    curious to see if anyone else can relate to this....I've been away from JW-world for many years yet really began to have a lot of issues resurface for me when I became a parent two and a half years ago. .........Specifically, I began thinking a lot about my parents raising me and I'm just blown away at the way in which they chose to fill my head with JW teachings from such an early age. I can't imagine ever teaching my little boy about wicked people, demons, Satan, destruction at armageddon and so forth at such a young age. Nor can I imagine making him sit in kh meetings for hours upon hours and spanking him if he didn't sit perfectly upright while paying attention. Much less making him go to dc's for all day meetings. My mother is always providing me with advice about raising my son which I generally ignore -- she told me recently that she hoped I would never allow him to read Harry Potter. I thought to myself, better Harry Potter than those awful wt books filled with pictures of armageddon and dead people and destruction. but that was the stuff that I (and a lot of you, too) was raised on -- I'm incredulous now as a parent that this was acceptable to my parents!!

  • daystar

    I'm with you. I've had to supress new levels of anger directed at my parents, remembering that they are just as trapped themselves.

  • loosie

    I used to be scared of the picture in the Paradise book or was it the Great teacher book? Where the demons in hell had people hog tied on picthforks toasting them like marsmallows.

    Yeah nice kids book

  • skyman

    relate to you forsure. My wife could not watch Bewiched or Herbie.... She was afraid of anything which that demons may be near. I hated the hour and hours of endless meetings. Thank God I saw the light before I did this to my kids.

  • limbogirl

    the JWs I grew up with loved telling stories about people that were demonized and then came into the "truth." these stories always scared the heck out of me and I think back to some of these tales and wonder how in the world any adult would think those were appropriate things to share with a little kid. one story was about how some newly interested person decided to burn all of their "demonic" books but the books wouldn't burn because they were possessed by demons and it wasn't until the elders prayed and said jehovah that the books burned. that story is mild compared to others that I was told -- I was terrified to close my eyes at night because the demons might come in my room. WHO DOES THAT TO A CHILD??? I could hear those stories but wasn't allowed to watch wizard of oz, bednobs and broomsticks, bewitched, the munsters, adams family and on and on.

  • mrsjones5

    My kids have the habit of telling my parents things that they like to do that my parents wouldnt have allowed me to do when I was growing up. When my parents tell the kids that they dont do that stuff (read Harry Potter, celebrate Christmas or Halloween, Boy or Girl Scouts) my kids aren't impressed. They are more concerned that grandma and grandpa dont have any fun. One time one of my son's said to me "jehovah's witnesses are boring".

  • serendipity

    My parents used to threaten us with being killed at Armageddon. They also reminded us about all the torture JWs went through in Nazi Germany, Malawi, etc. to prepare us for the Great Tribulation. Everything was fear-based. Not to mention all the judging of others.

    They were also quick to demonize everything. One night my Mom heard me calling out "Moses" while I was dreaming. She said I was under demon attack.

    As a result of my parent's techniques, I decided I needed parenting books. Thanks to them, even though I raised my daughter as a JW, I handled things very differently and emphasized love rather than fear.

  • Virgogirl

    I remember that awful orange book with the Armageddon and destruction pictures of the wicked, bodies flying and grimaces of pain and fear on the faces, They would sit me down to look at the pictures and keep quiet during the meetings or in the cargroup. There were talks from the platform about Satan and demonic everything! I was bothered by terrible nightmares as a child and would wake up shaken and screaming "Jehovah, help me!" They called them my "demon dreams." 'Oh, she's having another of her demon dreams. Nobody seemed to draw a connection to the topics of the meeting earlier that night, and my nightmares. It truly was barbaric, but considered perfectly normal to expose the children to those topics at a very young age.

  • Mysterious

    I remember complaining about a minor pain once and I was told that would be nothing compared to the Great Tribulation and I should toughen up so I wouldn't betray the brothers..

  • sass_my_frass

    I'm so happy after reading your email! I thought you were about to say 'I left The Truth but now that I have a child I am not so sure I made the right choice as how am I to give him hope in this dreadful world with no future moan moan moan'. The exact reasoning that made my mother take the dunking that would eventually destroy our family.

    You sound like you're going to be a great mother! Much love to you hon!!

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