"Go and get yourself ADOPTED THEN!!!!!!"

by Jez 29 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Jez

    My 15 year old phoned her JW father tonight. A relationship between the two does not exist. (I have touched on the reason why in other posts regarding both my children). Anyways, she called to tell him that she found out that he is contacting her school to get her report card and she wanted to know why he just didn't ask her. He said because he has rights. She said that they do not have a relationship, so why go around her like that, that she doesn't want it, it is none of his business etc....

    He says that it is not his fault, it is hers that they don't have a relationship. She says that everytime she tries, he is a total ass. He screams that no daughter of his will talk to him like that. She says that she is not his daughter, she is _______'s daughter (her step-dad). He yells,

    "Then WHY do I have to pay your way? Pay for yourself then?" (he gives $300 a month for support)

    She says, "Fine, I WILL"

    He says, "You must not forget the truth, everything I taught you."

    She says, "How about I find my own truth?"

    He says, "There is nothing out there, there is nothing except the truth."

    She tells him to stop it and leave her alone. He yells at her, "THEN GO and get yourself adopted out!" Well, that ended the conversation, she hung up after swearing at him.

    Afterwards, we talked about it, and she said, "You know, if he really cared, he would not say those things." My husband, her stepdad is going to now try to adopt her. If he signs her over, the deal will be that he can stop paying child support. I think that is what he really wants anyways. It is all about the money.

    Great JW isn't he? (He defines himself first and foremost as a JW, so I will as well.) Great teaching they do!!! Greatest fathers in the world!!! Way to hold your tongue!! Way to not let any abusive speech come from your mouth!! Way to get to your child's heart!!! Way to show love as your identifying mark!!


  • misspeaches

    ((((Jez & daughter))))

    What a heartless bastard. Sounds like your daughter has a step father who genuninally cares for her. You are lucky enough that she recognises this.

    I hope that all your plans suceed and this arrogant man can stop being so cruel to an innocent young girl.

  • mouthy

    Jez!!! I bet your blood boiled... What a rotton Father!!! Thank God she has a good step Dad...
    Imagine selling your kid for 300$ a month.... (((((((HUG)))) To you all 3...You ,the step Dad & Daughter .

  • lisaBObeesa

    I am so sorry.

  • Jez
    Imagine selling your kid for 300$ a month

    Ouch, I never thought of it that way, but that is exactly what it is.

    My daughter phoned my husband right away, (he was at work) and told him, he was LIVID. He said he was so sorry and that he is fed up. He said he will start the process on Friday. Told her that he loved her and she is his little girl.


  • Super_Becka

    Even if her biological father is a total jackass, it's good to know that your daughter has a step-father who loves her as his own and treats her like every daughter deserves to be treated, with love and respect. She needs and deserves that kind of love in her life. A relationship between a mother and her daughter is special, but the relationship between a father and his daughter is a different kind of special, and your daughter deserves to have that in her life. No girl should be without a father, and it sounds like her step-father is ready and willing to step up to the plate and be that man in her life. I'm so glad for her. :)

    As for her biological father, if that's the way he treats her, then I think it's in your daughter's best interests to just cut him out of her life completely, she'll be much better off that way and it'll be his loss, not hers. He doesn't deserve to have someone like her in his life. And your daughter deserves to have someone so much better in her life than him.

    I hope everything works out for you, your husband and your daughter. I wish you all the best!!

    -Becka :)

  • theinfamousone

    wow im so sorry she and u have to go through this... i know what its like to have a father like that.... JWs do not teach men to be fathers, they teach them to be power hungry control freaks... thats why he treats her so badly, because he no longer has control... im so glad she has you and her step father... i wish i had people like the two of you to take me in.... REMEMBER WHAT YOUR TRUE FAMILY IS, and thats what you have now...

    the infamous one

  • Satanus

    He sounds like a jerk, but, i would like to hear his side of the story.


  • diamondblue1974

    Sorry you are having to go through this Jez...its disgusting that he can react in such a way...theres an old saying that any idiot can be a father but not every man can be a Dad!

    Its good your Daughter has a father figure in your husband.


  • Jez

    Thanks Becka. I am glad that she is of age to choose for herself and can’t be forced to see him. I just worry about the youngest one now though.


    wow! what a fucktard!!!! im so sorry she and u have to go through this... i know what its like to have an ass hole for a father.... JWs do not teach men to be fathers, they teach them to be power hungry control freaks... thats why he treats her so badly, because he no longer has control..

    LOL, fucktard, that cracked me up. You are bang on about the control. It is exactly what you said. And thank you for the offer of violence.


    He sounds like a jerk, but, i would like to hear his side of the story.

    I know, when I write to vent, sometimes I think of that aspect. It is always better to know both sides. All I can tell you is that no father should ever say those words to a daughter who he is truly concerned about and loves. It is aimed straight for her heart and always hits. He knows exactly what he is doing. A 41 year old man that says things like that to a 15 year old, has major issues. Secondly, his behaviour is not new, he easily loses control. I lived with that for 15 years. He was finally arrested and eventually convicted for abuse, utter threats and harassment. This is the second time he has told her to get out of his life then and get adopted. When she tries to go to his house (in the past) he tells her that she is welcome BUT she MUST attend all meetings, if not, he told her, "then I don’t want to see you."

    Regardless of what my 15 year old dishes out to me, there are some things that I would never ever say. He says whatever pops into his little JW mind.

    Thanks Diamond. I just wish it would stop. I can't wait sometimes until they grow up, and that is horrible because I am rushing their youth and not just sitting back, enjoying them growing up.


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