I think the pain and hurt I feel now is more for him, he's in his own world of misery and doesn't even know it.
You're right. He doesn't even know it--yet. Although it seems like it, you haven't been d/f for very long. Your father thinks that by showing you tough love you will return to the fold. I am asking you to REMAIN STRONG. In about a year it will suddenly dawn on him what he has lost. Perhaps he will re-consider how he is behaving. It is possible. It does happen.
I feel for you for what you are going through. Don't beat yourself up over being depressed. You have a right to be. Please remember that, eventually, it will get better.
Like Sassy, I get treated like a disfellowshipped person by my sister, her family and my brother and his wife. It hurts. But there are a lot of other people who care about me. A few here are included.
We care. We're so glad you're here so that you can ask for support. We cheerfully give it to you. The brothers can't take us away from you. One thing they can't stop us from doing is associating with each other. I still view exjws as my brothers and sisters. The brother/sisterhood was one good and positive aspect of the org. Well, they can kick us out and shun us, but here we are: talking to and comforting each other.
Well it's now Wed. am and I've slept off the rum and Cokes. With a little help from Capt. Morgan and seeing all of your supportive messages I feel better.
Thanks so much to everyone who posted. Everyone at JWD becomes more valuable to me all the time.
So onward and upward--I'm going to live large and joyful today!
At first, it's like they take ahold of a freshly stitched chest wound and tear it back open every time they pull this crap on you. It hurts like hell and you want to scream, "What the hell is wrong with you?? I'm your kid!.. Have you no decency?"
After a while it turns into anger and when you see them coming you put your hands over your healing wound and guard it against assault.
Later, the would is healed but an ugly scar remains. It is tough and aches from time to time, but it is not as painful as before. It becomes a part of you.
It is at this point that you take your shirt off and don't give a shit who sees it or who knows who put it there. And, if any moron is stupid enough to try to grab you by the scar to open it up again, you'll tear them a new one.
That's kind of where I'm at with it. Maybe your experience will be different
(((( hugs & happy thoughts )))) for all those who need this right now!
Seems this time of year is when most of us can hit the bottom before we pick ourselves backup again. I`m soooo happy that JWD is here and can help.
Onesong-"gonna live large and joyful"!! NOW you`re talkin` dude!
Legolas hang in there!
Lisa, what a very thoughtful daughter, I hope that they are appreciating the gift and just think they can`t show it. Otherwise I agree with your daughter,let her call and ask for it back to see what they say!!
First I was afraid I was petrified Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side But I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong I grew strong I learned how to carry on and so you're back from outer space I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face I should have changed my stupid lock I should have made you leave your key If I had known for just one second you'd be back to bother me
Go on now go walk out the door just turn around now 'cause you're not welcome anymore weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye you think I'd crumble you think I'd lay down and die Oh no, not I I will survive as long as i know how to love I know I will stay alive I've got all my life to live I've got all my love to give and I'll survive I will survive
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart and I spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself I used to cry Now I hold my head up high and you see me somebody new I'm not that chained up little person still in love with you and so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free now I'm saving all my loving for someone who's loving me
*** This just popped into my noggin' when I read this. Saying "ah, you'll get over it" at this point is rather worthless. Stay strong, life will move on, eventually.
onesong - sorry for the pain you suffer at the moment. I know it well.
Just yesterday in one of the local 'big box stores' I saw two persons who were not long ago like my actual family - one was like my mother for over 35 years - the other like my fleshly sister for just as long. They looked straight ahead and pretended I was not there.
I am trying hard to train my thinking to feel pity for them - after all they are the one's still trapped by the cult. But it still hurts, huh?
Of course it doesn't bring us down, we know how it is. Please know that you are valued for who you are, and loved for who you are, despite your familiy's revelations. YOur value as a human being is NOT defined by the Witnesses, but by what YOU think of yourself. It might be not much, but do believe thatso many people have been through this and it's all OKAY! Please know that many of us have gone before you and we didn't value ourselves. We found out the truth. We are valuable human beings... and we believe in goodness and love... and we believe in YOU.
