Ever had a close friendship end with out really knowing what you did wrong?
It seems like, I have lost a good friend, not sure why, I guess that part is really bothering me right now. I wish I knew what went wrong.
DL76
End of a Friendship
by Dragonlady76 28 Replies latest jw friends
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wanderlustguy
God yes, right now.
Had a really good friend remind me...you know you didn't do anything wrong, don't let someone else make you a victim, they just weren't what you were led to believe they were.
I know it hurts like hell, God I know it, but you have to get pissed off because not telling you what is going on show a total lack of value for your respect and what you once were as friends.
You are better than that, we all are.
(((DL76)))
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Golf
Questio
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Billygoat
(((((DL)))))
I'm so sorry hun. I've been in your shoes before...and yes, it's very frustrating and hurtful. But then again, I've been in the other person's shoes too. I've cut off friendships because I was too immature to face them and tell them what they did that bothered me. At the time facing the conflict seemed more painful than losing the friend. I was so dumb. I've not done that in a long time, but we all have our past right?
I hope maybe you could approach the person and try to square things away. At least then you'll know you've done all you can do to salvage the situation.
Good luck!
Andi
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Golf
Question, that's a friend? I have many acquaintances not friends.
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Legolas
Yes I did it to someone last year, do you still go to meetings? do they? when I did it the person new my excuse why I wasn't going to meetings, but then I started smoking so to keep the congo 'clean' I stopped talking to JW, I still thought it was the 'truth' and didn't want to be disfellowshipped so I didn't talk to anyone, till a sister phoned me and left an interesting message and I got back to her and she told me of the Un thing thats when I stopped feeling guilty!!!! And my family and myself disassociated ourselves last month.
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BrendaCloutier
Yes, I have.
This friend "A" was going through a tough time with being layed off of a long-term job. I told her that I sincerely loved her and wanted her to know that. That was the last she spoke to me.
We -3 of us- had planned to go to an AA picnic together, I suggested we go early and anchor a spot. Friend "B" called me back a couple days after making plans when friend "A" was on vacation, and told me that they didn't want to go to the picnic with me! I asked why and no answer was given except that they wanted to do something different. I told B no problem, it was just a suggestion and I wasn't married to it, but no, they didn't want me to go with them. I was devastated!!!! I ended up going by myself and volunteering at one of the hotdog stands. I didn't have fun, and cried a lot that day. I did, however, make some new friends.
I wrote A a letter asking her what I had done wrong, after having called her several times and having her either hang up on me the moment she knew who it was, or just not answer.
She finally wrote me back a couple months later saying something to the effect that "I don't want to resume a friendship, have a nice life".
That one blew me away. The arrogance of it.
Well, I learned a valuable lesson: I did what I could to find out what the situation was that I may have needed to amend, but sometimes others egos won't allow them to. This insight was with the help of several people I knew and respected, and a therapist I had been seeing for domestic violence recovery.
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JH
(((Dragonlady 76)))
I have a very good friend right now, and I want it to last forever
In the past I had one way friendships. They were glad to see me, but never took the time to phone me or come over, but were always glad to see me when I went over to their place.
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BrendaCloutier
(((( Dragon ))))) I am so very sorry for your loss.
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Dragonlady76
Well, I learned a valuable lesson: I did what I could to find out what the situation was that I may have needed to amend, but sometimes others egos won't allow them to. This insight was with the help of several people I knew and respected,
Brenda,
This is good advice, Thanks. I just hate the fact that I don't know what I did or what the other person did that would merit a total abondonment of a good friendship. Don't we at least owe others some courtesy in this?......If it was to much to face them in person why not write them a letter, at least then their would be closure.
DL76<-----feeling