I am an ex JW. I am 55 and my parents became dubs when I was 4 1/2 years old, so it was a lifetime for me. My husband was a Seventh Day Adventist (very similar) and his family became dubs when he was 15. We have been completely out for nearly 4 years. It was about this time of year, in 1997, afer I finished reading Crisis of Conscience, that I told my husband I would never go to the KH again, and neither of us ever did. We went to the book study for another few months, since it was at the home of some good friends, who are STILL good friends, because they made us feel welcome, and they wanted us to be there. They knew what we believed, and never betrayed us. He is an elder too!
Hubby had been doing private research since 1991, and I finally saw what he had been telling me, in 1995. We decided to gradually fade out, and not be df'd. And it worked. Hubby resigned as an elder in July 1996, and we just very gradually stopped doing everything. I turned in fake field service reports for about two years, to keep them from making a call on me.
Our daughter, Princess, and her husband saw it all about the same time, without any of us discussing it together. That is a true story!! They quit in the Fall 1996, and didn't go again. So they left first......not df'd either. Our eldest son quit about two years ago, but had been fading out too. His wife is just now seeing it all too. We are treating her gently, and not getting too excited about it. Our second son, was df'd twice. At age 28, he got reinstated and never went again. He got married 4 years ago to a woman who was never a dub. Our youngest son, left after we all did. He was in High School, and being used in the congregation a lot. He overheard some gossip about us, and walked out of the KH, in a rage, and never went back. When he started college later that year, he met a girl, a pastor's daughter, and began dating her, and joined her church. They were married yesterday. He is very happy in that church, and that's okay with us.
Are we happier now? Definitely. No regrets. NO WAY!!!!
Marilyn (a.k.a. Mulan)