My life is going to have a BIG change soon

by Mulan 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    Most of you on this board know my husband and I have been caring for my aged parents for many years. Mom is 91 and is in assisted living now, since November, when we could no longer fill her care needs. (My parents have been divorced since 1969 so we weren't separating a married couple, in case you wondered)

    Dad (90) told me a few months ago that he wanted to go to assisted living too. I was sure he was missing the companionship of Mom, and let it go. Recently he has been talking about it again, and told me to get things started to move him. So I got the papers filled out, collected all the data they wanted on him, and put his name on the waiting list at the same place where Mom is, thinking it would be a few months. I put his name on the list two weeks ago. They called yesterday with an opening, and there is no reason to turn it down. I had requested the second floor, where the dining room is, and a room facing the front of the building for the most daylight (Dad is nearly blind). The room (a studio apartment) is on the second floor, facing the front of the building, absolutely perfect. I told Dad and he is looking forward to the move now. I am sure he is mainly wanting to give us our life back, but I insisted that he is welcome here always, but he said it was time to move. He is afraid he will need more care soon.

    So, in two weeks we will move him.

    Dave and I will be alone again, for the first time in almost 41 years. I have mixed feelings but mainly am excited about it. Privacy again. We can skip dinner if we want to, or go places without making arrangements for Dad. It will take some getting used to for sure. Our lives have been revolving around them for so long, it's been like having kids again. Dad was living here when our last child got married, so we have only had the first 11 months of our marriage alone. That was a long time ago.

  • copsec
    copsec

    You can run around the house naked again! Lol, no seriously Mulan, that is great. You will get to re-discover one another all over again.

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    Mulan, i cared for my mom after my dad's death for many years. Even after putitng her in a nurisng home it was still a lot of work. I did her laundry and of course visited her. My jw sibling did nothing. It did give us some privacy, but we still had a lot of obligation.

    oh yes, now my hubby can walk around in his shorts. That makes him smile.

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    I have to do that too, Wednesday, but it's not a big deal. The place will do the laundry, but they charge extra. Neither of them have much laundry to do, so I don't mind. Since they will both be in the same place, it will be easy to visit for the whole family.

    By the way, Weds, I got your mail yesterday. Many thanks.

    You can run around the house naked again!
    Dad is blind..................he walked in on me as I got out of the shower one day, and didn't have a clue. He thought I was putting on my makeup. Ever since that day, I don't have to hide when I'm not dressed appropriately. He has some peripheral vision, but it's weak too. His vision is like a thick cloud over his eyes, so only dark colors show through the fog. He recognizes the dark haired family members, but not the redheads and blondes.
  • Princess
    Princess
    You can run around the house naked again

    I guess we'll have to start knocking!

    I'm really happy for everyone concerned. It'll be so nice for grandpa to have so many people to visit and interact with along with group activities on a daily basis. He won't have any reason to be bored anymore. You and dad will just have so much freedom again after so many years!

  • blondie
    blondie

    Mulan, it almost sounds like a parent when the last kid moves out.

    As to running around naked, make sure you aren't giving the neighbors a free show.

    Blondie

  • Mulan
    Mulan
    I guess we'll have to start knocking!

    Nah!!

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    ...I thought you were going to announce that Princess and the boys woould soon have another sibling...

  • ball.
    ball.

    Mulan, all the best with your change of life. I live a single way of life. I guess you have gained a lot over the years from your experiences. Sometimes I think about all the different lives we all lead, I find it amazing. We all here have much in common with exiting the borg, but still lead very different lives. As I have not had the experience you have with the older generation, your post made me think a lot about growing older, something we were not taught to think about as witnesses.

  • wednesday
    wednesday
    By the way, Weds, I got your mail yesterday. Many thanks.

    mulan, my hubby has not stopped playing that tape since it arrived. U guys really made his day.

    thanks so much to u too.

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