I am on the edge of a freak out ..... I think??? (page 7)

sparrowdown

It's not called a doomsday cult for no reason.Everyday is effing doomsday to them.

People that believe every new day could potentially be the beginning of the "great trib" are basically scared $hitless.

The GB have basically said "the world is going to end and we are the only ones with lifeboats, if you want to be allowed on the lifeboat do as we say".

No wonder your wife is scared, we all were once.

The GB have made a very profitable business employing the gratuitous use of scare tactics,

and people who are scared are incapable of thinking rationally.

So how can I put this...Get a grip man.

I say this in the spirit of love.

talesin

I've always found this poem inspiring. Hope you do, too.

IF

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

~ Rudyard Kipling

Ding

Assemblies and other psych up meetings all have the same theme -- guilt JWs into doing more, more, more.

The hype works for a time but usually wears off on its own after a few weeks.

I hope that happens with your situation.

nonjwspouse

Ahh DD the anxiety is a b**ch . it can cause you do do things you lok back on and think " Oh why did i do/say that?. You need paitence, calm paitence. I am not in the same situation really, but I amhavving the same severe anxiety, and depressaions. medication is a good thing for severe episodes when you need it. It is a stepping stone to getting youraelf to learn other nonm medical antianxiety methods that word for you. Concentrate right now on relieving the anxiety, finding the eercise that works for you, the foods that work for you, the routine that works for you, the things that calm you. Foe each person ist is different but there are so many suggestions of things to try.

Stay calm is so much easier to say than to do. Believe me, I've been there too. But it CAN be done.

Your wifes feelings /reaction right now, MUST be placed into a box in your mind that you can shut up and put away. Those are hers, not yours. Her sontol, not for you to control by doing anything. Life is better when there is a calm rock that continues to do what is healthy and right for the family. You are that rock. Continue to love her, speak calm and reassuring her of your love, try to talk about enjoyable things haing nothing to do with the JW.

Time......lots of time helps. Don't rush it. You are at a critical ppoint that the meetings are creating unmanagable anxiety, so stop going, and with all the suggestions here of not letting the elders or anyone else corner you. No explination other than you are praying about it and you will get back with them when you are ready. Wash risne repeat.

So many people here give good advice, but only you know what will work for you. Can you seek out a therapist? One that specialized in spiritual abuse maybe? I found one and he is really good. Hard to hear what he has to say sometimes, but very insightful and ultimatly helpful. I have finally begun to empower myself against all the stresses of my marriage.

DD You will be on my mind.

rebel8

When I was a counselor & patients would say, "I can't stand it," I would say, "Ok. Don't stand it. What now?"

cha ching

Dear DataDog.... I think the suggestion: "Just tell the elders you have health/ stress problems" is the best. Tell your wife "I cannot take the stress, I am having anxiety, I cannot go anymore for health reasons.' (and really, really, really don't ever, ever, ever talk to the elders... just start breathing hard, holding your heart, and say "I can't, I can't, I need to be alone" LOL, LOL, LOL

You will totally have soooooooooooooooooooooo much more peace when you do not go or listen. Sit outside in your garden, watch a TV show and don't feel guilty, take a walk around the block... Your head will start to clear.

Take care, and let us know how it goes. .. Cha ching

NewYork44M

Data-Dog

Is all I have to say is "been there done that and bought the t-shirt." Your expreience is one that has been replicated by many before you, including myself.

Take a deep breath and understand that you have a long journey ahead. But, it will be worth the effort.

DATA-DOG

Well, the reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. Thanks everyone. I survived my trial by fire and the RC. Tomorrow is another day.

I have taken the good advice and just ignored my wife's mad ramblings. In truth, I have not watched the new propaganda film, and I wont. After hearing the descriptions of the husband, none of that even comes close to applying! I have never been some judgmental bible thumping asshole. That makes the comparison hurt even more. I can only explain her actions as mind controlled.

Here's to the future, whatever happens!!

nonjwspouse

Good to hear DD. Calm, make your plans for your days. Advance with your work. Keep your stress level down by placing her accusations and frantic actions on the outside. You are just looking at it, relegating it to the proper place, and continuing to provide, to be there for the family. To help the children. To even help your wife with any and everything non JW. Gift her with a trip to the beach with you, or a spa day, anything to help her that has NOTHING to do with the JW. Give her little gifts, a chocolate treat, plant her some flowers. Whatever floats her boat, you will knw what that is. That is what you concentrate on, not her ranting and ravings.

( I know physician heal thyself huh?) I need to remember my own advice! I know it is hard to do. But it is nessesary.

GrreatTeacher

Good job, fearless leader.

I am on the edge of a freak out ..... I think???

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