exJW Psychology 101--Keeping Your Cool While Fading

by Billy the Ex-Bethelite 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • cha ching
    cha ching

    After reading many experiences, and looking at my own experiences, I really do think that this "general approach" is the best.. Less detail = less arguing. Human emotion for right and wrong will connect with human emotion..

    I found two things they understood clearly. These were that WT policies on education and handling cases of child molestation are wrong...... Perhaps two other things also worth mentioning are that at some moment in our conversation, they stated, "well, the brothers are imperfect, there will be some mistakes." I was waiting for those words and it was my green light to repeat them, "yes, I know very well that they are imperfect, and I cannot pretend that they are perfect." And later repeated them again, "well, the brothers are imperfect, there will be some mistakes. So there's no point in arguing about what is printed in the Watchtower, because it could easily be another mistake and be completely changed in an upcoming article."

    .... Also, using their own words and thoughts (because you DO hear "they are just imperfect men" ALLLLL the time) and "there will be some mistakes" (so why do we believe them?) They really can't say A..N..Y..thing..... Otherwise, there IS no excuse, right?

    Let THEM be the ones having to explain...

  • williamhconley
    williamhconley

    Thank you Billy for you post.

    People automatically tend to minimize what a person says when they are saying it when yelling or making accusations even when true.

    Calm rational questions or conversation is generally the best way to go. If you have the facts on your side or substance on your stance you should not ruin it by delivering it with anger and rage.

    When dealing with injustices in the JW world or standing up against a body of elders staying calm and articulate without giving in to fear will scare the hell of lying corrupt elders and their busybody false accusing wives.

    W.H.Conley

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