It doesn't matter what critics think of the organization, it's the one who has been disfellowshiped who is shouldering the perceived shame. It's like being fired from a job. No matter how critical people are of the company or agency, and no matter how bad the A-holes are who run it, there's still the stigma of rejection. I had a good friend who worked for a very large intelligence agency in northern Virginia. Regardless of how reliable the things are (or aren't), polygraphs are used regularly to gague one's loyalty. My friend was an analyst and shared the office with a guy he'd become friends with -- a fellow analyst. He asked the guy if he wanted to go to lunch one day and his friend replied no, he had a routine polygraph check he had to go to. After lunch, my friend returned to his office and, to his great astonishment, found that his co-workers desk had been completely cleaned out. The guy's case files were gone, as was his personal belongings.
I know quite a bit about how polygraphs work, and more importantly, how polygraphers work. It's pretty much a game of bluffing. The process of having your loyalty questioned in the way it is cannot be described as anything but degrading. You're told you failed when you passed and you're grilled about the stuff you allegedly left out. It's very accusatorial process, and if you're outbluffed, you lose the game, you don't even get to go back to your office to clean out your things; it's all done for you and, of course, no one from the agency is allowed to contact the person, even socially. For all intents and purposes he's blackballed, even if he's totally loyal. My friend left under a dark cloud a few years later and was later featured in one of Paul Harvey's "Rest of the Story" episodes.
Even though he was convinced he held the moral high ground in his own situation, it was devastating for him. I don't know the details, nor have I ever asked him for them, but I did see the effect being fired had on him. In many ways, being disfellowshiped from Bethel is even worse. Not only are you rejected professionally, but spiritually. You're also held up to ridicule, something the ancient church NEVER would have done. Believe it or not, it taught love and compassion and sought to bring people back into the fold. Jesus was very quick to forgive. It was in his nature, and having died for our sins he had a right to forgive. "I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive," he said, "but of you it is required to forgive all men." One of the reasons I would reject the leadership of the Bethel organization is that they do not forgive. There is little compassion, only judgment. The woman who committed adultary and whom Jesus forgave, would undoubtably have been stoned by the GB!
I've heard many such stories from you guys, and it seems the elders are many times just itching to make someone an example. It's the mark of a manmade organization, in that manmade organizations will always reflect the doctrines of man, not God. I can't imgaine Christ ever shunning anyone. In fact, he seemed to actually enjoy being around sinners whose sins were burdens to them. And, as I indicated, he was quick to forgive anyone who asked. Thus, if YOUR church doesn't reflect that internally, you need to examine the path you are on. In the meantime, I'm sure this fellow who was disfellowshiped is suffering on many levels, professionally and spiritually. This isn't the time to give him the silent treatment, but to show compassion and love.
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BTW, has anyone ever published stories reflecting the greatness and compassion of GB members? Has anyone ever written articles saying, it's been my privilege to know and work with these men for years, and I can attest that they are men of God! They treat the gardeners and the janitors with the same respect and love they do for each other! If the answer to these questions is no, then the Holy Spirit isn't with them.