Visiting a KH...

by ianao 22 Replies latest jw friends

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  ianao

  Hello amicus.

  In regards to my original yelling, you were not in on the convo my ex friend and I were in before I posted my message. His view were that all appostates apposed God. We had a lengthy discussion on this, and my point to him was a rehash of what I yelled on the thread, regarding athiests. Sorry I did not make that clear in my personal comments to him.

  I think you should take your JW friend up on his offer to attend a meeting. Why not? Thinking you'll be trapped into something you'll always regret is like saying that a faithful JW will become an apostate by visiting this site.

  Well, after another convo, I don't think he is going to even admit to reading this site, let alone this thread. His response to me is ALWAYS: "I don't have to. I know what they are going to say. They are appostates, and I don't give a rip about them!"

  He refuses to listen to the opinions/feelings of others, yet he wants me to come into a KH and see things for myself. As far as I'm concerned, he has erected his mental barriers, and I am pretty sure that from his point of view, I have erected my own. A sad situation really.

  I have to ask myself, "why do you even bother?". I always answer to myself, "To win the argument!". Inherently it is evil. I truly should be ashamed of myself. Even if Jonathan himself encouraged me to seek truth, he is apparently not willing to do so himself. He is the ultimate in a loyal servant. It's just too bad that he serves a man made organization. What a shame. I've never had a friend like him before.

  Signing off...
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  thinkers wife

  Dear Moody Blue,
  I just feel so darn bad for you. I feel like hugging you really hard and sitting down and having a real heart to heart. So that you could unburden your soul.
  One observation, it doesn't sound to me like you are confused about your doubts and feelings. It sounds like you are very concerned and confused about what the results will be if you act out on them.
  And you know what? No one can predict what will happen.
  I have found that since I stopped doing all the stuff you're expected to do when you are a JW, that I have so much more time to really think about the important things. One of the things my counselor kept asking me was "are you taking care of yourself". This was every week for a long time. I used to get so frustrated, because I didn't know what she meant. What it really boiled down to was, having time to truly take care of myself. Having time to think. Having time to pamper my intellect. This is something the Society robs you of. IMHO, this is on purpose, so that you don't have time to nurture those doubts, that I'll bet every single JW has. It would be dangerous to them to allow people that kind of freedom. It means they could lose someone. And that is just not acceptable to them.
  I have had problems with debilitating depression for years. You know what I think? I think it had everything to do with my abusive husband (who by the way was an active witness), and the control the religion has had over me. I haven't been to a KH for a year and a half, and guess what? No depression. Now I am not saying that not going to KH would cure your depression. But making a decision that is right for you would lessen your stress level, which definitely does not help depression. I am also not saying that if the consequences of you acting on your doubts caused you and your husband to part that that wouldn't be stressful and hard to deal with too.
  But I think right now what is really tearing you apart is not knowing what is going to happen. I know it would scare me terribly. But you can only know the results if you pursue whatever it is. You can't live your whole life in a miserable situation just because you don't know what will happen if you quit.
  The only thing is, you must be sure this is what you really think. Please don't go through all of this and then change your mind later. Make sure your doubts are real. Make sure you have educated yourself enough about the WT teaching to know for yourself whether they are right or wrong. Then make your decision.
  TW
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  thinkers wife

  Ianao,
  I truly hope Jonathan reads this forum and your lovely letter. I hope he reads some of the older posts too. Some of them really give some history about what others here have gone through.
  Again I wish I could hear any discussions you have with the "men in the congregation".
  Good Luck!!
  TW

  Edited by - thinkers wife on 17 January 2001 15:46:19