Disfellowshipping Offense

by Had To Go 37 Replies latest jw friends

  • LV101
    LV101

    tell him that worshipping at the watchtower is satanical and he's gullible/stupid.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    That's some husband you got there.

  • Scully
    Scully

    You weren't there to worship. You were attending your sister's wedding. Your husband is a controlling jackass.

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    NewChapter & Grandma Jones are the only ones with accurate information. Your husband it totally wrong. Tell him to keep up with what the WT says. (Don't you hate people that are so blatantly opinionated and don't know what the hell they are talking about?) It is a conscience matter to go to a church wedding, just don not participate in a Mass or religious rite. It's not wrong and you do not have to be repentant about anything. You don't need the elders' manual........see the following WT article:

    WT 10/15/2007 pg 27-29 -- 10 There are many families in which one mate has become a Christian but the other mate has not. (1 Peter 3:1; 4:3) This may present various challenges, such as when there is a wedding or a funeral of a relative. Imagine the case of a Christian wife whose husband does not yet share her faith. One of his relatives is getting married, and the ceremony will be in a church of Christendom. (Or a relative, maybe a parent, has died, and the funeral will be in a church.) The couple are invited, and he wants his wife to accompany him. What does her conscience say about attending? What will she do? Imagine these two possibilities.

    11 Lois reflects on the serious Bible command, ‘Get out of Babylon the Great,’ the world empire of false religion. (Revelation 18:2, 4) She once belonged to the church where the wedding is to take place and knows that during the ceremony all present will be asked to share in religious acts, such as prayer, singing, or religious gestures. She is determined to have no part in that and does not want even to be there and be under pressure to break her integrity. Lois respects her husband and wants to cooperate with him, her Scriptural head; yet, she does not want to compromise her Scriptural principles. (Acts 5:29) Hence, she tactfully explains to her mate that even if he chooses to be there, she personally cannot. She may mention that if she attended and refused to share in some act, it might cause him embarrassment, so in that sense her not attending might be best for him. Her decision leaves her with a clear conscience.

    12 Ruth faces virtually the same dilemma. She respects her husband, is resolved to be loyal to God, and is responsive to her Bible-trained conscience. After thinking about points such as the ones Lois considered, Ruth prayerfully consults “Questions From Readers” in The Watchtower of May 15, 2002. She remembers that the three Hebrews complied with a command to be where idolatry would occur, yet they kept their integrity by not sharing in an idolatrous act. (Daniel 3:15-18) She decides to accompany her husband but not to share in any religious deeds, and she is acting in harmony with her conscience. She tactfully but clearly explains to her husband what her conscience will permit her to do and what she cannot do. Ruth hopes that he will see the difference between true worship and false.—Acts 24:16.

    If you are going against your husband's wishes (headship issue), that may be another matter, but feeling obligated to go to a family wedding/funeral in a church is NOT a disfellowshipping offense.

  • alias
    alias

    Isn't it just crazy that we even need to have a conversation like this? I remember following the lead of my parents and NOT going into a church for my (non-JW) aunts's service when she died, and sitting out in the car with my JW family while others went inside to pay their respects. It felt wrong, so wrong.

    That we can't act with our own conscience in these matters is just mind blowing. Having a hubby turn you in is even worse.

    looking in the mirror,

    alias

  • NewChapter
    NewChapter

    You know, but when that 2007 KM came out, I remember some thought it meant it was no longer a conscience matter! I remember someone reasoning with that 2007 KM to say her son had done something wrong by attending a church wedding. Another person used an even earlier publication to reason that her son had done something wrong in attending a wedding. I always marveled at this. We already had SOOOoooo many rules, and we would beat each other and make it harder. It used to irk me so very much, but was a losing battle. Perhaps your husband hears the same tone when he reads the literature.

    You don't have to answer this if it is too personal---but do you think he may be using your religion to control you? I had that happen to me. Everything became a theocratic issue. Could he feel like you usurped his headship, and now he'd like to get the power of the elder body behind him? Aren't you happy that this won't affect you nearly as much as he might think it will?

    NC

  • Jim_TX
    Jim_TX

    I suppose your husband has never gone to an event like a football game in a stadium. Where they have the national anthem. If so, was he there to participate in the anthem, or enjoy the game? Kinda stretching... but a similar situation.

    You weren't there for the church - or church service - you were there for the wedding. Period.

    Just casually, you might mention to your husband that turning you in to the elders is a divorcing-offense.

    Regards,

    Jim TX

  • bottleofwater
    bottleofwater

    It's because a ton of them are masochists.

  • Gayle
    Gayle

    I thought as long as you don't do worship of prayer or songs/hymns, then it is a conscience matter.

  • NewChapter
    NewChapter

    It's because a ton of them are masochists.

    I think there is something to that. Also, ask any sister who is not "scripturally free". You'll learn that she is reminded of that at every corner. I got told that SO much, and like, I already knew that. For some reason, they loved to point it out. I suppose it made other sisters happy that there was not so much competition for the 3 eligible brothers per circuit.

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