Tyrant of a wife!

by whatistruth 74 Replies latest jw friends

  • whatistruth
    whatistruth
    and no matter how much you love some one, you can't live life like that. So what is holding you back?

    What is holding me back? I DO NOT LOVE HER. Had to make that clear. I did very much at one point. But that is long gone. The fear i guess, what am i going to do for work? I own a home, what happens to that?

  • GrandmaJones
    GrandmaJones

    I will tell you the same thing that I would tell a woman in the same situation. Never, never take abuse. It never gets better. Someone who abuses you now will abuse you again later. Don't listen to "I'm sorry".

    Anybody who hits you, threatens your life, is verbally abusive, and stalks you the way she does is dangerous.

    I don't normally advise the average person to abandon a marriage except in this kind of case. The three "A's" need to be important criteria for leaving...Abuse, addiction, or adultery.

  • GrandmaJones
    GrandmaJones

    Think about this...you were looking for a job when you found this one...

    Regardless of what your home is worth, the worst that can happen is the judge forces a sale and you divide the proceeds.

    I wouldn't worry too much about alimony if you are childless and have only been married ten years. Assuming the two of you are relatively young and she has not been proven to be mentally ill (in which case you might have to keep up her health insurance) probably the judge will, at worst, give her alimony only long enough for retraining etc.

    See a lawyer, see a lawyer. He'll give you good advice.

  • whatistruth
    whatistruth

    Thanks GJ. As to the advice of many here I will speak to my lawyer this week.

  • whatistruth
    whatistruth

    I have seen a therapist on my own just to see if I am blowing things out of proportion, but he even suggested maybe the best thing to do is leave under the circumstances.

  • Hoffnung
    Hoffnung

    Ask her to open her bible and read aloud Prov 21:9,19. ... Tell her that she is more than a contentious wife, that she makes you feel like pooh, and that unless there is a complete turn in her behaviour, you are choosing the wilderness land above living with her, and that the bible is backung you up for doing so. I hope you can sit through that without her going bananas. Salomon was a great guy, and he had firsthand experience with women it seems.

  • whatistruth
    whatistruth

    Hoff. Been done and done again. She takes no blame and uses the you don't deserve respect unless it is earned. I agree with that and after 10 years of poo I deserve respect somehow. But even so, according to wt teachings she has no choice but to "obey", but i'm not that type of guy. I want to move on meet someone who is loving, kind, respectful, etc... I just have to turn the page and begin a new chapter.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    I own a home, what happens to that?

    That's why you need a lawyer more than anything. You need to protect your assets. Remember, she'll have half the congregation coaching her on how to screw you out of $$$. You need to know your rights and how to protect them, and only a lawyer can help you do that legally.

    W

  • chickpea
    chickpea

    not sure if already mentioned but you need to document
    this abuse so get something recorded...

  • free2beme
    free2beme

    DIVORCE!!! And grow a backbone! I can't believe a man would put up with that. I felt sad reading that, sad that someone would not stand up for themselves to the point that they live in fear.

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