OMG! I am 50 this year! Why am I freaking out? Anger - how do you cope?

by hamsterbait 47 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  mindmelda

  I turned 50 April 26th of last month.

  The worst part of it is my doctor keeps bugging me to have a colonoscopy. I'd rather have something shoved up my butt, thanks anyway.

  But, seriously, getting old is very scary for my husband and I. Thanks to being Witnesses and believing we had no future in this "old world" to prepare for, we didn't.

  We're both in our fifties and don't even have a savings account, worked more or less manual labor jobs, like good JWs were supposed to do while we waited on Jehovah. My husband is a plumber, which was good while building trades were doing well, but not now. He hates repair plumbing work, he was always new construction. He wants to get a technical skill job, for which he needs some training. He's good at electronics and computers. He's thinking more votech school...he has gone for auto mechanics and plumbing in the past.

  I'm trying to change my situation by going to college next fall, as I qualify for a few government grants. I've had job training for several different kinds of work, and some night school college courses over the years, but a degree in something would make a lot of difference. I'm going for nursing/psychology...I have a knack for medical, I've been told, and there's plenty of jobs available in that area where I live now.
• 

  jaguarbass

  I'm 58, Parts of my life suck and parts are good.

  I run 2 miles a day go to the gym 5 days a week, play in a rock band, ride a harley.

  If you have aches and pains, you need to go to the gym and exercise then you wont have aches and pains.

  I'm not afraid of dying. When I die, I think I will reincarnate and come back because there were some things

  I didnt get right this time and overall I like it here.

  I'm pretty sure I have been here several times before.
• 

  mindmelda

  I agree Jaguar bass. Sometimes I think we get mad at aging because we start grieving in advance about dying, which admittedly becomes more possible every year we're alive, them's just the breaks. Anger is one stage of grief. You just have to get past it, and people usually do.

  Then you move on to depression and bargaining and finally some sort of resolution. I've resolved to make the most of my last 25 or 35 years on earth, and have more fun than people should be allowed to have.

  I sing, dance, listen to loud music, and do some of the fun things I used to needlessly deny myself. I enjoy my body, my hobbies, my friend and my family.

  Reincarnation is as good as any other belief, whatever makes your hair blow back in the wind. I'm not afraid of dying anymore either. I see death all the time as a CNA taking care of the elderly. For most of the very old, it's a damned relief, its no fun being inside a body that doesn't work anymore. I always think of them as being free of all that now. I don't mind being free of the mortal shell when it's time now either. It's just the way things are, and a waste of time getting your panties in a knot over it now. On to the next thing, whatever it is.
• 

  four candles

  I was 50 in \february.....like someone said it's just a number. I feel like a 25 year old....................................................................................................

  I won't get a 25 year old but one can dream!!!
• 

  straightshooter

  At 56 I realize that I cannot go back in time to live life differently. But I can do what I enjoy for the future instead of trying to please the WTS. Do the best that you can with what you have.
• 

  Old Goat

  I'd be happy to tell you how I coped, but I'm not sure I remember 50 at all. It doesn't get better, it gets worse. My only problem at 40 was some butt-spread. My hair started thinning at 50. At sixty I started to hurt constantly. Now ... sometimes i remember to tie my shoes ... I can hardly wait for 80. So near, so much fun, such adventure, such aches and pains! Quit yer whinin' buster! You're a spring chicken.
• 

  cult classic

  lol @ Old Goat - Now that you're older you see the past in perspective?
• 

  Damocles

  For me, its all about each day. I have a failing in thinking too much about the future so that I can't enjoy the present. Don't have much of a problem with the past. Sure I stayed a dub too long, but it wasn't wholly bad. No its too much living in the future that is my bane and at 60 there is not as much future to obsess on.

  I try to enjoy the good things of each day. Of course, there are the rare perfect days and the rare perfectly shitty days, but mostly its a mix. Right now the roses, iris and peonies are blooming gloriously. The bay magnolia puts a sweet odor on the whole yard not to speak of the honey suckle. The dog is asleep by my feet. I am well fed and enjoying a glass of rum before bed. Its a good day.

  You know if you string together enough good days, you may come up with a good life.
• 

  purplesofa

  got this in an email today, had to share it with you!

  $5.37. That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me. I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid with the Elmo hairdo said the harshest thing anyone has ever said to me. He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount." I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully. I stood there stupefied. I am 48, not even 50 yet? A mere child! Senior citizen? I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with Elmo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil. Old? Me? I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile. Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of me, like I could be that easily distracted! What am I now? A toddler? "Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?" I stared with utter disdain at the keys. I began to rationalize in my mind. "Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!" I turned and headed back to the truck. I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn. What now? I checked my keys and tried another. Still nothing. That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror. I had no purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror. Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the back seat. Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut on the dashboard. Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle. Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found. I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the restaurant one final time. There Elmo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world coming to?" All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in here?" At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security benefits. Elmo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by mistake." I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized. She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this all the time." All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40. Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast. As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blankey. The good news was I had successfully found my way home.
• 

  ziddina

  Aw, Purple Sofa, that's a somewhat sad email!!!

  Hamsterbait, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

  

  Ooooh! So many neat icons to choose from... (heh, heh...)

  Alright, I'm not afraid to admit I'm a "Star Trek" nerd...

  

  Oh! And check out the thread, "CoCo's Art". Meandering through an online art gallery might make you smile...

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/social/entertainment/194011/1/CoCos-art-Cause-I-wanna-be-able-to-see-it-all-at-once

  Zid