I am Agnostic. What happened??

by horrible life 23 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • trevor
    trevor

    I don't get this be a MAN. DO Something!!!! & BE THE MAN OF THE HOUSE.

    I thought that being a man now meant treating women as equals and not taking charge of their affairs.

    I am confused. Perhaps your husband is?

  • horrible life
    horrible life

    I peeked in, before I left, and I understand the man thing. But, last month, their daughter told her friends, that my daughter was looking up on the internet how to make a bomb. That she is a slut.

    The mother, has been going around town, saying that I am bi-polar.

    The list goes on. I asked a neighbor to help with a resolve to this, and to help us, not be friends, but to make peace, through scripture, haha, and prayer, he asked her, and her husband called me up, and said nobody wants to talk to you, or your daughter.

    on, and on, i could go, but I have to go to work. My husband will sit back, and watch as my daughters and my reputation, go down the tubes. I truly believe, that if he would have just called after the first couple of incidents, and told her husband,

    "hey, lets get our wives to stop talking, and bad mouthing each other, and our girls to leave each other alone' this would have all come to an end. The thing is, I have told my daughter, since day ONE, not to talk about them, to anyone. That was the agreement between the 4 parties, when the girls started fighting. Then the mother gets pissed at me, for something, and it has escalated to this. I have still informed myself, and my daughter, to be the better people in this, and not talk about it to outsiders.

    Instead, it festers, and her husband gets in on it. and my husband is oblivious to anything. I can tell him a story, about what happened, and the next hour, he has it twisted, into some other story, and I think he is a complete idiot!!!!

    Then he will say, in a strong voice, "I will take care of it"". When I get home, he will have forgot, or he didn't have time. He remains a bump on a log.

    No I don't follow him as the head of the house, because he has always been passive, Maybe I need to take lessons, but I can't see how he can let other people hurt his daughter. She has been hurt emotionally and mentally through all of this, and could have been hurt physically the other night racing home.

    Later, I have 50 miles to work.

  • Slappy
    Slappy

    Just a suggestion. Jesus said to turn the other cheek (as agnostic, take that as you may). Now I can't pretend to know what you're going through, but when I've been in similar situations, I found it best to let others do/say what they will about me or my family/friends. Also, if people have to stoop to name-calling, then I think you've already won. If it continues on much longer, and you remain detatched from it, then others will start to see those people in the light of who they really are: vindictive, immature, baseless, and bitter. Also, it has been my experience that when people behave in such a manner, it's because they are trying to cover-up something that they have done, so they try to put the attention on somebody else so people will ignore what's going on in their life.

    However, don't be detatched from your daughter...that would be very bad. The two of you, with God, will be able to withstand anything.

    If you keep letting the drama get to you, then you will only get more and more confused, and nothing good has ever come from that...in my experience.

    Also, if you act like nothing is going on, which isn't easy by any stretch of the imagination, then it will confuse the hell out of whoever is causing problems. IMO, that's when things will start moving your way.

    To further what has been said about meditation, which I agree with, as long as you can bear in mind that when you're angry (or any strong emotion for that matter) your ability to reason rationally is zero to none. It's not that anger is bad--it's highly justified in certain cases--it's just that it has an adverse effect on rational behavior, and can take a bad situation and make it infinitely worse.

  • horrible life
    horrible life
    It's not that anger is bad--it's highly justified in certain cases--it's just that it has an adverse effect on rational behavior, and can take a bad situation and make it infinitely worse.

    Slappy, I have alot of experience in the above!!! I will go on Amazon tonight, and find some meditation books.

    Slappy, who are you?? Have you ever been a JW? There is something about your post to me, that had an expensive taste to it. A wiseness, that only a handful of the old-posters here have. I then glanced at your other posts. I found you very wise indeed, and educated.

    I don't know if others have noticed you or not. You are very new, and I feel, like you could help or expand the minds of many on this board. No, not just with their personal problems, (like mine, LOL) but in understanding life, ex-JW-ism, give another side of biblical scriptures, etc..... Don't know if anybody has welcomed you yet, but I will start a new Topic, and please tell us about yourself.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    HL, sorry I missed your post earlier. When I first read this...

    I read about Jesus love for all, and about husband and wife getting along, to make a happy family. All of the sudden, I was calm, and I really didn't care if the director called, and piss on her. This all happened in a span of less than 10 minutes.

    ... I thought, "OH MY GOD !!!! HL DIED AND IS POSTING FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE !!!!!"

    Then as I read on, it appears that you are still mostly alive... which is good, but I was really hoping you could post to JWD from beyond the grave and tell us whether the soul is immortal or not. Maybe even get a one-on-one interview with the man upstairs or the other guy... depending, you know. But I digress.

    Sorry things are going bad right now HL. I like to meditate sometimes. I picture myself in the beautiful and tranquil rocky mountains. Wide open, clear sky. Majestic trees and colorful flowers that seem to make the entire universe stare in awe. Birds singing and wildlife frollicking nearby. Peaceful and serene, yet full of life and delight. I am there standing in a clear, clean, jewel blue lake warmed by the summer sun's rays. And there, a million miles away from the rest of humanity, I'm holding the head of that stupid bitch under the water until the bubbles just stop... and pull her up just to get half a breath and then splash, back her head goes under the water until the bubbles just barely stop... gasp, then splash, gasp, then splash. Ahhh, I don't know about you, but I'm feeling better already.

    B the X

  • parakeet
    parakeet

    B the X wrote: "....And there, a million miles away from the rest of humanity, I'm holding the head of that stupid bitch under the water until the bubbles just stop......."


    I don't think your form of meditation is mentioned in any of the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism, but I can understand its therapeutic effect. LOL

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Billytheex

    Actually, there are many kinds of meditation. If there is someone who has a mental hold on you, that kind of thing can break it.

    S

  • horrible life
    horrible life

    LOL LOL LOL My sides hurt now!!! Billy ex, I was really reading your post, trying to picture, and feel the calmness. Thank you!!!!! You don't know how much I needed that! I do feel better.

    I am so glad Satanus, parakeet, and you Billy, have a sense of humor. I guess laughter is the best medicine.

  • Slappy
    Slappy

    Maybe I should clarify on what I meant by meditation. There is what most people think of when they hear the word, that being emptying your mind of all thoughts (or finding a "happy" place) and achieving a state of relaxation/calm/tranquility. That is not what I meant. Cognizant dissident mentioned something along the lines of thinking (aka. meditating) about oneself and one's feelings. This is more along the lines of what I had reference to. The former type is all good and well, but the calmness it bestows upon one is only temporary and then one has to meditate yet again to achieve that state...I guess there is too much similarity between a buzz (whether from drugs, weed, or alcohol) and that state to make me truly comfortable. I've seen the effect of dependency in my friends' lives, and I fear and hate what it is capable of doing to a life. Not that I'm saying they are one and the same, just that they are eerily similar.

    I am fond of introspective meditation; dwelling on one's own state, feelings, why one thinks how one does, etc... This, IMO, can have a very positive effect on our lives by giving us a greater understanding of who one truly is. Peace is then only a step behind, walking hand in hand with Confidence.

    As for who I am, I'm nobody. Just one who has seen the detrimental effects that organized "religion" has had on countless lives and that none of those "religions" gives a true representation of God and His Word. It pains me to see others soured so completely that the Bible can no more be true than Santa. I honestly believe that, depending on one's persepective, different people can draw different conclusions from the same portions in the Bible. Not opposing conclusions mind you, just that some portions can be applied in different ways to one's life depending on the experiences one has undergone (experiences, not what one wants the Bible to say). For a body/group of people to say that the Bible says this, and only this, that sends off alarms in my head. That doesn't agree with the Bible (which is why I'm so fond of Romans 14). We are only human, who are we to say what is what with 100% certainty?

    I don't look to tell people what is what, but I do attempt to give them a different perspective and/or the motivation to honestly look for an answer themselves. For others can tell one how things are, but unless one searches and finds those things out for oneself, can one truly hold to them? I think not. The most difficult thing to do is to disregard whatever one currently holds to be true and make an honest and truthful attempt to understand another's point of view. Even if one ends up holding to one's original beliefs, one will have gained an understanding of an opposing belief and will have gained the respect of those that hold to the opposition, for they will have seen that one gained an understanding of their perspective and didn't brush it off as stupidity. When people have respect of another's beliefs, then people can truly engage in an argumentative discussion for the edification of all.

    If you want to know more (about me) then I can start a new topic. However, I don't want people judging what I say based on the type of person they think I am. Whether it makes them disregard what I say or embrace what I say...it doesn't matter. The message is always greater than the messenger, and to judge the message based on the messenger shows a shallowness that is detrimental in its limitations. I would dare to extend that to Jesus Himself...except that He is the message, so I am spared what many religions would view as blasphemy/heresy.

    Btw, I've completely overlooked your original question: What happened?

    Try 1 Corinthians 10:13 "...will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it."

  • cognizant dissident
    cognizant dissident

    Horrible Life: A great beginner book to learn meditation is "Wherever You Go, There You Are" by Jon Kabat Zinn. He is a doctor who runs a stress reduction clinic at a major university hospital in the states. He also has a another book, called "Full Catastrophe Living" which I have not read but I have heard is very good. His books are designed for everyone and do not have a buddhist or religious bent to them. They are about the proven health benefits one can get from meditation, both physical and mental.

    The techniques are simple, it is about slowing down, sitting still, doing nothing and really paying attention to what is going on around you and within your own body and mind. Tapping into your inner wisdom, so to speak. It will carry over into every other aspect of your life. The hard part is disciplining oneself to do it regularly.

    Cog

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