I think Im being shunned

by purplesofa 10 Replies latest jw friends

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    There is a JW that works where I do at the hospitol.

    She brought a patient to my desk and looked right through me.......spoke to the woman next to me and went on.

    Well, I thought she might not have recognized who I was (these new glasses)

    Today I was approaching her in the hall and she saw me and looked the other way.........I waved at her and said HEEEAY! and smiled real big.....as I was passing her. She turned around and said Oh hey.

    It does not bother me personally, and now after not going to meetings for two years (only one) I should expect it.

    I have a feeling my fading out is going to need to come to a head. Word must be really buzzing around as this sister does not go to the congo I went to but we have mutual friends.

    I have had plenty of time to sort out my thoughts and feelings about the organization.

    I don't feel like I have gone apostate against Jehovahs Witnesses as much as I will never be part of any organized religion. Most are out there hailing they have the truth and be ready for mass destruction, the only way to survive is to join them.

    After researching the beginnings of Scientology I thought how can ANYONE know that and be a part of it? Not much difference in knowing what I know about the WT.

    I will not rush forward and DA myself ......Im not made to be confrontational. They can do whatever they feel impelled to do. I feel sorry that there is such constant divisions happening on the whole Planet. Everyone seems to need to be part of a club or a club expects them to conform for association.

    I will take my chances alone. I will survive with those who are open minded and loving. Willing to think out of the box. Ones that leave their options open to new ideas and people............willing to agree to disagree in peace.

    Thanks for letting me go on,

    I thank everyone for helping me to get to this place in my life. So many do not post here anymore.

    sf..........amazing isnt it?

    purps

  • Gopher
    Gopher
    Word must be really buzzing around as this sister does not go to the congo I went to but we have mutual friends.

    JW's actually are gossipping? I'm shocked - SHOCKED!!

    I came back to work at the company I left about 13 years ago, and a JW who knew me back then is shunning me now. I cornered him in an elevator and starting chatting him up, he couldn't wait to get to the first floor!! That was fun.

    Who needs narrow-minded people like that in their life? I think they're doing us a favor by shunning us.

    As far as DA'ing, would you really need to? Taking that action lets the organization call the shots on who cannot talk to you. Better to leave that grey zone open if you can, IMHO!

  • juni
    juni

    Like Gopher said - JWs gossiping? NEVER! lol

    Don't ya feel the love purps? The same happened to me too. I thought perhaps they had DFed me on the sly. Didn't think so, but the snubbing led me to believe that.

    ~ I hope she talks to you when it's concerning the patients.

    Juni

  • Pubsinger
    Pubsinger

    return the compliment and talk/look through her.

    Pointedly.

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    Thanks

    I knew this was coming. I have been fading for two years and everything has been friendly with the witnesses in my area, but I am sure since I am not attending meetings at all........its obvious I am not going to. For the most part I like the "brothers and sisters" I like most people.

    I remember talking to AlanF on the phone when I first was coming to the board. I told him I was DF for nine years and he asked me why I came back...........I said I could not stand it that 6 million people on the planet could not talk to me.

    It always bothered me and I suppose it will again.........but this time I wont have that deep guilt of being DF and I understand the org now in that I dont believe they speak for God.

    purps

  • tim hooper
    tim hooper

    Purps,

    This is their problem, not yours.

    If this nurse can't look you in the eye then it's because of her own stupid narrow-mindedness, and because you've chosen to think for yourself.

    Don't let her make you feel intimidated either; look her straight in the face, smile and ask her how she is every time you meet her!

    tim x

  • Warlock
    Warlock
    Today I was approaching her in the hall and she saw me and looked the other way.........

    That used to happen to my wife and I when we were ACTIVE! LOL!

    Warlock (feeling the love )

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    It hurts when people take action just because they feel like it. But hey, at least you know that you don't need them, right? You have a really great attitude about it and it sounds like you've come a long way. People eventually run out of things to say about the exiting experience. I can see why some people eventually decide to stop playing the games and DA to achieve closure, but a lot of other people find a happy equilibrium and make their people take action if they choose. Only you know what's right for you; go the path of least pain and confusion for you hey.

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Dear Purps,

    Likewise, I'd want those 6 million people to like me. I'm a people-person and I hate muddles and uncomfortable situations, since, at heart, I'm an idealist. But I've become more of a realist - not jaded or hard-edged - just more aware and understanding of peoples' behavior. I repeat over and over to myself the sentence [I believe it's a book title]: 'What you think of me is none of my business.'
    I'm much happier now that I'm concentrating on my own attitudes and behavior and lowering my expectations about what people supposedly "owe" me.

    Peace and love,

    CoCo

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet
    ...........I said I could not stand it that 6 million people on the planet could not talk to me.

    It always bothered me and I suppose it will again.........but this time I wont have that deep guilt of being DF and I understand the org now in that I dont believe they speak for God.

    purps

    Purps - think of it like this - six million people on this planet are being deprived of your company for ever by their own uninformed, unintelligent choice. Like Tim's said their loss.

    I personally feel really sorry that my parents and sisters are missing out on my life or getting to know me as an adult. Plus there is one friend I really really miss called Liam.

    But other than that those 6 million people mainly said nothing honest or true, nothing beautiful or touching, nothing genuine or loving or even sincere - like they had thought of it themselves (not read it in a WT publication), nothing kind or upbuilding in the whole time I knew me. They just sat and judged and repressed me. Why on earth would I want to talk to them again? All the cool ones escaped and are here and have been kinder and more loving in so many practical, emotional, honest ways than any dubs.

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